Melanie Tonia Evans

Evolutionary Trends For 2017 And Why It’s Time!

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  What a year 2016 has been and I don’t think any of us can believe how fast it has gone. Doesn’t it just feel like a few short months ago it was last year’s Christmas? Each year is slipping away faster and faster. This brings me to the first of two points that I would love to investigate with you in this article. Time. The other topic I wish to discuss with you is a theme that I have seen come up over and over again – with women I know, women in personal healings and also consistently throughout the Community. (more…)

 

What a year 2016 has been and I don’t think any of us can believe how fast it has gone.

Doesn’t it just feel like a few short months ago it was last year’s Christmas?

Each year is slipping away faster and faster.

This brings me to the first of two points that I would love to investigate with you in this article.

Time.

The other topic I wish to discuss with you is a theme that I have seen come up over and over again – with women I know, women in personal healings and also consistently throughout the Community.

The Difference Between Judgement and Discernment

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  As we grow and become more involved in our own personal-development, we may battle with understanding how to deal with those things we feel passionately opposed to. The following are common confusions ... When is negative emotions ours to deal with and not ours to deal with? When it is okay to know our own minds and rights and be in opposition to something? How can we be effective in our missions and causes to make our own life and the world a better place? (more…)

 

As we grow and become more involved in our own personal-development, we may battle with understanding how to deal with those things we feel passionately opposed to.

The following are common confusions …

When is negative emotions ours to deal with and not ours to deal with?

When it is okay to know our own minds and rights and be in opposition to something?

How can we be effective in our missions and causes to make our own life and the world a better place?

The 5 Stages Of Forgiveness

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  A lovely friend of mine Sylvia inspired me, in her reply on one of my Facebook posts, to write this article. "Forgiveness" is such a hot topic … and within the self-help, psychological and healing industries it is a widely acknowledged term. It’s also a very confusing and misunderstood topic. The deeper implications of forgiveness and the personal freedom it achieves and why it achieves it, are not necessarily examined, talked about or accepted. And there are many people who may have believed they have "forgiven" – who have done it conceptually, yet have not experienced a true shift in their heart and being. I know what this was like – before my profound personal journey of narcissistic abuse recovery, where I had to actualise True Forgiveness to save my life … (more…)

 

A lovely friend of mine Sylvia inspired me, in her reply on one of my Facebook posts, to write this article.

“Forgiveness” is such a hot topic … and within the self-help, psychological and healing industries it is a widely acknowledged term.

It’s also a very confusing and misunderstood topic.

The deeper implications of forgiveness and the personal freedom it achieves and why it achieves it, are not necessarily examined, talked about or accepted.

And there are many people who may have believed they have “forgiven” – who have done it conceptually, yet have not experienced a true shift in their heart and being.

I know what this was like – before my profound personal journey of narcissistic abuse recovery, where I had to actualise True Forgiveness to save my life …

Does The Thriver Model Place The Blame On The Victim?

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Is the Thriver Model of taking 100% personal radical responsibility one of “victim blaming?” Occasionally people tell us it is … And there are times when I have received some very angry messages from people who are infuriated by the idea that we have to take any responsibility for the abuse we suffered. I felt that it was time to write an article about this, and deeply look into it, and also to invite a discussion here after this is written. (more…)

Is the Thriver Model of taking 100% personal radical responsibility one of “victim blaming?”

Occasionally people tell us it is …

And there are times when I have received some very angry messages from people who are infuriated by the idea that we have to take any responsibility for the abuse we suffered.

I felt that it was time to write an article about this, and deeply look into it, and also to invite a discussion here after this is written.

Raising Consciousness After Narcissistic Abuse – The Difference Between Victimisation and Thriving

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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For those of you on my Facebook Group you will have seen that I have been sharing a 10-part series. The article and radio show this week is about a “mission” … it really is. It’s about truly defining what I am most passionate about and what this calling to help change lives is really about. A little over a week ago I had an awakening within me that was so powerful there was no ignoring it – and nor the “information” that was inspired within me. In know whenever this happens that there is something so much greater than myself pulling the strings. (more…)

For those of you on my Facebook Group you will have seen that I have been sharing a 10-part series.

The article and radio show this week is about a “mission” … it really is.

It’s about truly defining what I am most passionate about and what this calling to help change lives is really about.

A little over a week ago I had an awakening within me that was so powerful there was no ignoring it – and nor the “information” that was inspired within me. In know whenever this happens that there is something so much greater than myself pulling the strings.

How to Deal With Your Emotional Pain The Right Way In Order To Grow and Expand

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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This article is very important, and it is about some profound realisations, as a result of my healing journey. Primarily this article is about how intense our emotional pain is, how it feels like is taking us out, and how to deal with that. We all know  emotional pain can feel all-consuming, and be very hard to handle. Hence why we have tried so hard to run away from our pain,  because we feel like it will eat us alive if we collapse into it. (more…)

This article is very important, and it is about some profound realisations, as a result of my healing journey.

Primarily this article is about how intense our emotional pain is, how it feels like is taking us out, and how to deal with that.

We all know  emotional pain can feel all-consuming, and be very hard to handle. Hence why we have tried so hard to run away from our pain,  because we feel like it will eat us alive if we collapse into it.

Shouldn’t We Make The Narcissist Accountable?

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Truly…I hear this question all the time… Even people on the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program can agonise with this question. This is how they present it to me… “Melanie please tell me WHY I shouldn’t hold him / her accountable!” and, "WHY shouldn’t he / she PAY from what he / she did?!” (more…)

Truly…I hear this question all the time…

Even people on the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program can agonise with this question.

This is how they present it to me…

“Melanie please tell me WHY I shouldn’t hold him / her accountable!” and,

“WHY shouldn’t he / she PAY from what he / she did?!”

The Futility Of “I Will Be Happy When…”

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Life is full of many incredible ironies, and the more we get to understand how life really works, and Who We Really Are, we can begin to understand what does serves us is not what we have been programmed and conditioned to think. The operative work in the above sentence is ‘think’. The information in today’s article is a sharing of my personal journey and the path I am connected to presently. This path fascinates me and excites me beyond anything I have ever felt and experienced emotionally and vibrationally before, and I am literally stunned by how pure and simple it can be. (more…)

Life is full of many incredible ironies, and the more we get to understand how life really works, and Who We Really Are, we can begin to understand what does serves us is not what we have been programmed and conditioned to think.

The operative work in the above sentence is ‘think’.

The information in today’s article is a sharing of my personal journey and the path I am connected to presently.

This path fascinates me and excites me beyond anything I have ever felt and experienced emotionally and vibrationally before, and I am literally stunned by how pure and simple it can be.

How To Let Go Of Blame And Claim Your Personal Power

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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It is so easy when we have been hurt to move into the normal human response of ‘blaming’. “Something feels wrong, and someone has to be responsible for this wrong feeling.” We then quickly move into blaming. Please understand that by ‘blaming’ I mean believing: “I am in this circumstance because of what someone else did. What they did was wrong/immoral/etc.” (more…)

It is so easy when we have been hurt to move into the normal human response of ‘blaming’.

“Something feels wrong, and someone has to be responsible for this wrong feeling.”

We then quickly move into blaming.

Please understand that by ‘blaming’ I mean believing:

“I am in this circumstance because of what someone else did. What they did was wrong/immoral/etc.”

Holding On To Resentment Makes You Powerless

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Most of us know what it is like to feel angry, resentful and even to have strong feelings of hate towards someone. These feelings may only last a short time, or you may have been carrying these feelings for years. By holding resentment towards other people you are effectively shifting the blame onto someone else. “The reason for my unsatisfying experience is because of his or her actions.” This stifles the healing process, because when we make it someone else’s job to provide us with love, support and safety then we have to wait for them to fix it for us. This leaves us powerless… (more…)

Most of us know what it is like to feel angry, resentful and even to have strong feelings of hate towards someone.

These feelings may only last a short time, or you may have been carrying these feelings for years.

By holding resentment towards other people you are effectively shifting the blame onto someone else. “The reason for my unsatisfying experience is because of his or her actions.”

This stifles the healing process, because when we make it someone else’s job to provide us with love, support and safety then we have to wait for them to fix it for us. This leaves us powerless…