In Part One we discussed some of the templates for Quantum Realities … the theories that at the Quantum Level “there is no outside”, and “we are powerful Creators as per the levels of consciousness we are connected to Life at.”
These revolutionary models allow us to move out of the victim perspective of “Life is happening to me”, into the Quantum Creator Level of “Life in my experience is unfolding through me.”
The Quantum Model of radical personal responsibility shifts us into the driver’s seat in life, and what I am sharing with you today goes into greater detail about that.
During this article, Part 2, I will give you more information and more research topics to allow you to explore Quantum concepts at deeper levels for yourself.
The Quantum Promise
The irony of the Quantum Journey is this – the people I know who have discovered Quantum information were generally living “radical personal responsibility” a long time before they started searching for Quantum Truths.
My friends, colleagues and other evolving people generally found their Quantum Journeys through adversity and even necessity – because of the breakdowns in their life which caused them to strive for a different way to live as a result of their old life formula no longer working for them. These people researched Quantum Truths as an extension of the spiritual / self-development journeys that they were already on.
There is a very interesting aspect of “consciousness” that we should know. When we are at certain levels of consciousness we can absorb information that matches those levels. Levels beyond that will not resonate with us. Yet when we have an intention to expand our consciousness and start efforting towards growth – then we are open and receptive to expansion into new paradigms and ways of being that exceed levels where we were previously operating.
Victim consciousness does not allow for such growth – because we hang on to and even fight to justify our painful, traumatised and stuck positions.
It is only when we have had enough of victimisation and are willing to give it up, that we will even be open to Quantum Truths, let alone be able to actualise them in our lives.
When you are ready to embrace and activate Quantum Truths is when you are already consciously living them even if you don’t know that you are … because the gateway to these orientations is “spiritual” and not “scientific”. People live it through experience rather than try to mentally construct and hold on to it as concept.
Quantum Truths are not a logical, left brain orientation. They are deeply felt as Unity Consciousness – an understanding that our subconscious is interconnected through e-motion (energy in motion) to the creation of our Life.
My own personal Quantum expansion was through a spiritual journey that learning about Quantum Realities only confirmed. Quantum information resonated very deeply with me because I had cleared enough trauma out of my body to cellularly recognise it as truth.
What is exciting is, we are in an incredible time where the bridge between spirituality and science is dissolving. Science is starting to confirm things that ancient spirituality has been teaching for centuries.
In fact all divisions now have a chance to dissolve – namely the crippling separation and wars between men and women and different races and religions. This can only begin with healing the fractures we have all suffered within our own beings – the feelings of dire separation we have suffered with our Higher Power, ourselves, each other and our world.
The human race has lost touch with the connection of all living things, with the soul ecology of community, interrelatedness and society and how one part affects the whole.
Modern day models are about “separation” – separation from each other and separation from personal responsibility. They deem the mind and body as separate, the emotions and body as separate and a total separate ecology where symptoms are attempted to be treated whilst parts of the whole are either completely ignored or damaged in the process.
Instant gratification is the name of the game, with no care or responsibility to the long-term wellbeing of anyone or anything.
This victim, entitlement, separation, judgement consciousness … where we have been disconnected from our own inner being, as well as our power to heal ourselves and create personal reality, or connect healthily with each other and the ecology of our planet has not done any of us any favours.
Thank goodness finally, finally we can merge our left and right brain hemispheres, integrate our conscious, super-conscious and sub-conscious, become whole, heal ourselves and then our world.
I believe the answers lie in understanding what Life really is at the Quantum Level – and applying the truths that will set us free.
The promise and hope of Quantum Truths is that again we can come home … home to the responsibility and power in our own body to show up as healthy and integrated people who co-exist healthily with ourselves, our planet and each other.
Something needs to change and Quantum Realities have the answers.
I believe this with all of my heart.
The Quantum Model is Not New – It’s Ancient
The ancient teachings, the more you research them, speak of nothing but Quantum understandings.
One of countless examples is where tribal societies used to adopt the principle of a mother and father purifying themselves mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually before conceiving a child.
Epigenetic Science now confirms that a child’s emotional and physical predispositions, and the formation of an embryo’s brain is absolutely made up of the “consciousness state” the parents were at the time of conception.
Many spiritual students know of the books written by Don Miguel Ruiz. One of the most famous spiritual books (in my opinion) of all times is his book The Four Agreements. Another of my favourite ever spiritual reads of Don Miguel Ruiz’s is The Mastery Of Love.
Don brings forth the wisdom of his people, the ancient spiritual messages from the Toltecs – people of Southern Mexico who came together to study at Teotihuacan the ancient city of pyramids outside of Mexico City.
Toltec knowledge arises from the same Unity Consciousness of truth as all the esoteric ancient traditions do from all around the world.
Unity Consciousness is the Quantum Model – meaning the interconnectedness of all things.
The Toletc message is one of being The Creator. The principle is that our Life experience is a “dream” that we are “dreaming” (creating), and if it is created with Love the dream becomes a masterpiece and if created with Fear the dream becomes a nightmare.
The Toltec tradition is Quantum – because the belief is “You create yourself, whatever you believe you are. You are the way you are because that is what you believe you are.”
In among some of the profound incredible teachings in this book is this passage – “We wear a social mask because it’s too painful to see ourselves or let others see who we really are. And the denial system lets us pretend that everyone believes what we want them to believe about us. We put up these barriers for protection, to keep other people away, but those barriers also keep us inside, restricting our freedom …. When you are aware that everyone around you has emotional wounds with emotional poison, you can easily understand the relationship of what the Toltecs call the dream of hell.
Hell is a place of suffering, a place of fear, a place of war and violence, a place of judgement and no justice, a place of punishment that never ends. There are humans versus humans in a jungle of predators; humans full of judgement, full of blame, full of guilt, full of emotional poison – envy, anger, hate, sadness, suffering.”
Essentially the journey of healing according to the Toltecs is about freeing ourselves at the level of causation – meeting the poison of our wounds and dealing with those wounds so that we can transform who we were being, in order to free ourselves to become Who We Really Are – which is Love.
This is the same Quantum message Mahatma Gandhi spoke when he stated, “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”
This is the Quantum Model of taking 100% personal responsibility, one person at a time, to clean up our own side of the fence – meaning the poison we have been carrying in our own bodies.
One of the most profound books you could ever read about the origins and truth of “narcissism” and “victimhood” is Wetiko.
Again this book is absolutely Quantum, just as it is all about ancient wisdom. In an identical framework to the Toltecs wisdom, Wetiko describes a “psychic sickness” referred to by Native Amercians. This is the identical concept to “the poison inside humans” recognised by the Toltecs.
As Paul Levy, the author of Wetiko, states … “Humanity has fallen prey to a collective psychosis which I call malignant egophrenia. Indigenous people have been tracking the same “psychic” virus that I call malignant egophrenia for many centuries and calling it “Wetiko,” a Cree term which refers to a diabolically wicked person or spirit who terrorizes others.”
Professor Forbes, who was one of the founders of the Native American movement during the early sixties, says “For several thousands of years human beings have suffered from a plague, a disease worse than leprosy, a sickness worse than malaria, a malady much more terrible than smallpox. Tragically, the history of the world for the past 2,000 years is, in great part, the story of the epidemiology of the Wetiko disease. Wetiko/malignant egophrenia is a “psychosis” in the true sense of the word as being a “sickness of the soul or spirit.”
Both Levy and Forbes are both describing the same illness of the psyche, soul and spirit that has been at the root of humanity’s inhumanity to itself.
What Wetiko is relating to is this: the sickness of ego – unconsciousness, which is all about not taking personal radical responsibility, and the denying and self-avoiding of inner traumas and then projecting them at others.
This is the exact states of narcissism and victimhood which is deeply interconnected as two sides of the same coin, and this unconsciousness gets passed on through abusers to abused, and it spreads like a disease through offspring, and has become an epidemic of terrible proportions throughout humankind.
What is the way to heal the spreading infection of Wetiko? The only answer, and the book Wetiko talks about it specifically … is the Quantum Model of radial 100% personal responsibility.
Meaning the healing of one person at a time to become virus free and awakened with this total understanding – If the wounds are within me they are mine. No-one else is responsible for them because they are mine. No-one else has the power to heal them for me. I DO have the power to evolve beyond them.
Then that person no longer becomes a contaminant carrying the Wetiko virus and passing it on to others – which is what narcissists and people mired in victim consciousness do. In stark contrast the people who are no longer in the trance of unconsciousness break free of the virus and start generating healing for the virus throughout the world.
Nothing less than the Quantum Healing Model can achieve that.
The Most Radical Quantum Model I have Ever Heard About
A Quantum Truth, as I discussed in Part One, is “there is no outside” … meaning that we are a generative force of our own personal experience.
What I am about to share with you is well worth researching if you have never heard of Ho’oponopono – an ancient Hawaiian spiritual practice.
Ho’oponopono as a healing technique, is the most radical personal responsibility Quantum Practice I can think of.
How Ho’oponopono became exposed to the world is because a Hawaiian therapist, Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len, cured an entire ward of criminally insane patients without ever having any direct contact with them whatsoever.
This was documented as fact.
This story was picked up by many people. Joe Vitale a well know spiritual teacher heard about it and co-wrote the book Zero Limits with Dr. Ihaleakala which spread word of the asylum’s miraculous healing and Ho’oponopono even further.
The entire basis of Ho’oponopono works like this … “There is only me in this entire experience and if something enters my experience (even as mere information) then I am responsible for it.”
Understandably, even the most spiritual people on the planet who take radical personal responsibility could struggle with accepting responsibility at this level. Certainly people who are not into any sort of Quantum understandings may believe that Dr. Ihaleakala’s belief that he himself was 100% responsible for the insane criminals being insane would think this man is crazy for taking “the blame” for these people’s insanity.
But that responsibility is exactly what he took – he spent every day that he worked in the office of the asylum going over the patient’s files saying over and over, “I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you.”
The truth is what he was doing was healing these patients by healing himself.
The Ho’oponopono belief is “We are all One”, and “If I heal me in regard to you – then I heal you.”
Please let me say as a warning I do not agree with people trying Ho’oponopono on narcissists. In all of my experience with being intimately connected to thousands of cases of the huge wakeup call of a narcissist in your Life, I know this – narcissistic abuse is a soul contract for you to leave abuse and to learn to love yourself.
It is not about healing that other person … and the people who have tried to make it about that, rather than heal themselves, always pay a terrible price.
I did a ThriverTv episode on this exact topic.
In Dr. Ihaleakala’s case, he certainly was not under siege or having his original wounding battered to bring forth the soul lesson of recovering his own being. The interaction with the patients via their files, rather, was an opportunity to up-level matters with the use of Ho’oponopono.
This example of radical personal responsibility shows us a profound Quantum Model of interconnectedness.
Practitioners of Ho’oponopono believe that the steps of Repentance “I’m Sorry”, Forgiveness “Please forgive me”, Gratitude “Thank you” and Love “I love you” are forces of amazing power, that call the Divine to move through us as us.
Now let’s do a deeper dive into some Quantum Concepts.
Specific Quantum Findings
This may be the part that you have been waiting for if you wish to get Quantum logical and factual proof.
To be honest with you this is the place where my eyes can glaze over. I have attempted over the years to read deep scientific research, which I find very heavy and not appealing to my more right-sided feeling and intuitive brain (which I promise is not how my brain used to be before up-levelling myself).
For years now I prefer less time researching and more time living in Quantum Ways – which simply means releasing traumas and negative emotion out of my body and then being more and more free to grow, express and channel love, inspirational and radiance through my heart, being and life.
That to me is as Quantum as needed, because everything that has been wonderful, miraculous and incredible in my life has come from that … and I have healed states and ways of being that I never could have if I hadn’t made room for the great stuff by getting the trauma out of the way.
None of that could have happened via “research”. I know that every moment I spend focused on trying to learn about my wounds is a moment denying myself my own self-partnering and love and the straightforward process of up-levelling them – which is releasing them and replacing them with the Infinite Wisdom and Healing of Source (the Quanta Freedom Healing method).
Having said this, I discovered Quantum information along my growth path that did excite me, because it wasn’t “heavy” and it totally confirmed what I already felt and believed deep within me.
Keep in mind that with every debate and theory that does not have real physical evidence (how can consciousness or the unseen world be physically and absolutely measured?) can be argued, and there will always be theories and opinions to disprove anything … especially within communities and groups where old paradigms are not easily given up.
This is why I deeply believe Quantum Realities – relating to the consciousness behind the creation of everything – are much more verifiable when applied and lived.
Please find the following information which, no matter how many people try to debunk it, IS revolutionising and shaking up the old science models.
The Double Split Experiment
The first information that many people come across in regard to Quantum Understandings is The Double Split Experiment, which was the big discovery that opened the world’s eyes to Quantum Mechanics. This was documented in an easy to understand fashion in the movie What The Bleep.
To me the most important thing about the Double Split Experiment is the realisation of the “connectedness” – the “Oneness” of ourselves and The Universe, and how our own consciousness interplays with people and situations.
This leads me on to share with you information about the “holographic” nature of things.
Life As a Hologram
Indigenous people’s version of Quantum (unseen) Reality was that we are “dreaming” up our reality – that the truth is there is only our own “consciousness” creating what we “see” and “experience” around us.
Scientifically physicists are researching the concept of the Universe as a hologram.
Spiritually speaking, the belief of our life as a hologram means that in every person and encounter a part of ourselves is super-imposed in it. In effect we are always meeting an aspect of “self”.
Absolutely, in the context of healing from narcissistic abuse, I have discovered that when I have up-levelled the parts of myself and my wounds that related to the fears, past traumas, limitations and judgements that narcissists brought up for me, I broke free from abuse and all the symptoms of it.
During this evolution of my own self I have 100% recognised that the wounds of myself and narcissists were in many ways totally a match … the narcissists was projecting back to me and hurting me with my own fears of abandonment, rejection and not being loved that narcissists carry as well.
What I adore about the holographic nature of things is how our consciousness is superimposed through all space and time in the entire hologram, meaning that if we make a change in our own consciousness we can positively affect the whole as well.
I have seen so many times that when parents (as an example) up-level themselves, other people in their family start to get well also.
Eoin Finn my favourite yoga teacher says, “I really believe you can change the world by getting into a hammock”, and I totally get why he says that.
Often we are invested in “doing” whilst trying to combat something, rather than aligning with and starting to experience the power of the unseen world, consciousness and the holographic nature of things. Once we do realise this power we start getting very interested in working a shift in our consciousness first and foremost before engaging in “doing”.
Gregg Bradden talks about the Universe as a Hologram in helpful ways in this short clip.
Now, to take a deeper dive into “connectedness” of all things, I’d like to share with you some information about the Quantum Entanglement Theory.
The Entanglement Theory
Einstein called this “spooky action at a distance”. This is about how subatomic particles separated by even billions of light years can be “entangled” and when a change is made to one particle, then the other one will simultaneously reflect that change.
These changes are taking place at some level of consciousness that is not information carried at the speed of light. They happen much faster, and perhaps simultaneously regardless of the distance separating them.
If we believe in entanglement theory then we can realise that entanglement between individual cells and even humans can take place where one person’s state (consciousness) is directly affecting another. Even if these two people are separated by physical distance and have no physical contact whatsoever.
In recovery from narcissistic abuse, I have absolutely seen so much proof of energetic/emotional entanglement, as well as experienced it personally myself.
When people who have been narcissistically abused up-level their consciousness beyond the previous “matching” (entangled) woundedness to a narcissist, the psychic draining and affecting of energy leaves, and the person breaks free from the crippling psychic vandalisation (the feeling like the narcissist is alive in your being) and recovers.
I have discovered that this freedom from entanglement is not truly achieved by physical choices of separation, it is generated rather from a direct up-levelling of one’s own consciousness.
For more information regarding entanglement, this short video may help your understanding.
By working with Quantum Truths, which necessitates working directly on our consciousness, we not only have the ability to release ourselves from entanglements that are not serving us, we also have the ability to unleash the connections and creations to what does – the positive and empowering things, situations and people that we never previously had access to.
This can be understood within the next Quantum Theory …
Superposition
Superposition refers to any topic in our life existing as a wave function until we bring our consciousness to it, and then we collapse down the wave function (multiple possibilities) into what we know as a “physical manifestation” – namely physical particles.
If we accept this theory as real it means that we have a literal “mural” of everything available to us – multiple possibilities simultaneously available in The Field (Life) that we can align with. What we will align with is in accordance to where our consciousness is on these topics.
This is what is meant by “where our attention goes is where energy flows”. Therefore if our attention is on pain and fear we “choose” the quantum possibilities that match that state of consciousness and these are the events that will collapse down out of the wave function of infinite possibility to become real events and people in our life.
Just as such, if we have self-partnered, worked at healing ourselves and up-levelled our consciousness to one of love, authenticity and showing up as a whole person instead of a wounded one, we are much more likely to collapse down (manifest) supportive, nourishing and flourishing (loving) events and people from the infinite wave of possibility.
To understanding Superposition more you can watch this clip from What The Bleep.
Becoming the “Space” of Creation
The following concept is something that you can really only breathe in and feel .. and I invite you to do this with what I am about to share with you.
Those who are working with Quanta Freedom Healing will already know exactly what I am talking about here.
To me, one of the most important parts of Quantum Understandings is to emulate the wellbeing of “space”.
Atoms are made up of 99.999999% space, and in that space is the freedom and wellbeing of consciousness … known as God or Creation or Lifeforce or our Highest and Best Potential (whatever your understanding of a Higher Power is).
I believe with all my heart that this “Higher Power”, this stream of consciousness is well-being and pure, positive Lifeforce and it is only our wounds and limitations (density) that are keeping us separated from it.
The truth was, no-one taught me that concept – it was deeply experienced. What I discovered is the more and more I cleared toxic density out of my body, the more and more I had the somatic experience of my cells opening up into the freedom of having more space within them.
What I am referring to is the releasing out of my subconscious the toxicity of pain, fear, judgements and the traumas I was holding.
The more I did this, the more room there was to have organic wellbeing, love, joy and freedom flowing through me.
Then the more space I had in my thoughts to just be, and the more room there was inside me for inspiration, knowing and wisdom to arise.
And the more I felt free – free of my old constrictions, fears and physical, mental and emotional limitations – and the more able I was to enter and be in the world without fear simply as pure love and joy.
I realised that the constriction, shutting down, closing off and protection had just been trapping the density inside me – poisoning me and not allowing the “space” for organic God / Creation / Source / Wellbeing / Lifeforce to flow through me.
Truly … we are made of the same stuff as is everything in this physical Universe, and for more information on this you can watch this wonderful presentation by Carl Sagan.
My belief is that we are supposed to be at one with the Universe, one with the “space”, infinite possibility, wellbeing and joy – and that is impossible when we have density and fear trapped inside us clogging us up.
I believe that this is the template of Oneness and Unity Consciousness that we can all become one person at a time, because at the coded DNA level we already are this – it is just the False States of density, fear and judgement that have separated us from this truth.
To me “truths” are embodied (not just tried on as mere ideas) by creating space in our bodies when we clear the toxic junk (trapped painful emotions, traumas and beliefs) and get them out of the way. That is when the true understanding of ourselves, the Universe and Life simply arises from within.
This is how virtually all my information has come to me … in a deeply organically felt way. It is the same for so many others on this path, because it is coded within us to begin with – we just need to be at the level of consciousness to re-member Who We Really Are.
Then it is organically so.
The Quantum Way to Heal From Trauma
When we go Quantum in relation to healing from narcissistic abuse, we step out of the Life orientation of trying to sort ourselves out logically, and we drop into a much deeper level – the subconscious – which is connected at wave function to everything in the hologram.
We were always taught that our logical mind is where our Life is taking place. Modern Science and Epigenetics now explains to us that this is not the truth.
I want you to think about this – our subconscious is in charge of the literal trillions of chemical processes our body is involved in every second of our life. Processes that keep our organs working, cells reproducing, our hair growing, our eyes seeing, and countless other tasks.
None of this is any “knowledge” that our logical mind understands, let alone knows how to do.
You see the subconscious is the power machine … it is Universal, it is connected to All That Is (the Entire Field), it is timeless, and it just “does” whatever it is programmed to do – creating, giving birth to and drawing all the necessary components from life (situations and people) to fulfil its programming,
It has no sense of “right” or “wrong”, it just does what the programming tells it to do unconditionally.
There are ways to know if our Super Conscious Mind (our Highest and Best Potential) and our Conscious Mind (what we would like) and our Subconscious (Internal Operating System) are aligned.
When they are we feel “clean”, “alive”, “spacious” and “free”, and we have no need to control the outcomes of Life.
In this state of alignment we live without fear, and our Life works by starting to break into new desired ground that our previous mis-alignments were keeping us separated from.
This is called “breakthrough”.
In stark contrast, when our subconscious is manufacturing evidence of beliefs that are not aligned with our Super Conscious and our Conscious, we feel traumatized, depressed, anxious, fearful of life, obsessing about our past, and worried about our future.
We try to “think harder” or to “change our thinking” to try to change what we are “feeling”, which only leads to more obsessions, more struggles, and more self-sabotage.
Narcissistic abuse is the absolute experience of THAT, which we all know so well.
This is called “breakdown”.
If we think that our logical mind is in charge of our life, we really need to think again. It isn’t, because our subconscious operates 40 million nerve ends per second within our brain centre, and our conscious mind is only operating 40 per second.
Our mind is only ever a servant of what is already existing as our subconscious programming – for good or bad.
Bruce Lipton’s findings are that by 35 years of age, 95% or more of people’s lives are on a predestined trajectory regardless of what they “try to think”. Because our mind with it’s teeny 5% power over a 95% powerful subconscious machine is like trying to beat an elephant with a mosquito.
When we go Quantum we realise our thoughts are wrapped around exactly what our subconscious programs have decided is real for us. For example we will think negatively about love, or money or ourselves if our previous instilled beliefs have trauma on these subjects.
Traumatic Inner Belief System Programming didn’t happen “logically” … none of it. The greater majority of it happened before we had any logical developed sophisticated brain (12 years of age). It was all created from our emotional feelings.
The subconscious takes in powerful emotional data, and then makes the belief in accordance to the emotional assessment. These beliefs are formed by E-Motion (Energy In Motion). This is how our entire life is created, and logical thinking has very little impact on emotional belief systems, especially those which carry high emotional (traumatic) content.
I want you to “feel” these statements …
“I think traumatised” …
“I think abandoned” …
“I think devastated” …
Of course that sounds ridiculous! There is a total disconnect with that!
Of course the word “think” is meant to be replaced with “feel”!
Thinking is not the language of the emotions, and was not how belief systems were formed, and is never the solution or the way to reprogram them.
When we go Quantum we start “feeling” and getting inside our bodies to self-partner with our emotions and when we start working with subconscious reprogramming tools we have the ability to bypass the logical filters and get to the truth of the wounds inside us.
We cannot heal what we are not prepared to feel (meet), and once we self-partner and have the right tools to work with, we can transform ourselves in Quantum Ways beyond description.
To Simplify What I Believe
Quantum Truths and Holographic Realities are: we are all One.
There is no place at the wave function level where you start and I stop.
We are all made of the same stuff.
We are all a part of Creation.
If we all cleared up our trauma and had this knowing of Oneness deep in our cellular DNA we could never harm another, because we would know that is only harming ourselves.
We would also stop pointing our finger outwards at other people trying to change them, knowing the only change we can ever make is ourselves.
No economic, political or societal punishment or reform will ever heal humanity … only a shift in consciousness ever can.
Because damaging behaviour happens as a result of painful beliefs – hurt people hurt people.
Negative beliefs happen as a result of trapped trauma creating those painful beliefs.
Until trauma is released from people’s beings and humanity one person at a time – hell on earth continues.
Imagine a world where every human being took personal evolutionary responsibility at this level … working at healing themselves from their own trauma.
Then we would all live our lives free of fear, pain and judgement as an expansive, free self and no longer as a small limited, closed down self.
And we would no longer protect, defend, harm, attack, hide, horde or damage.
We would generate healing, wholeness, and Oneness to humanity and to our world.
And we would know that every time we free a part of ourselves, we assist in freeing all other related parts within the hologram.
We would create heaven on earth.
That’s the Quantum Model of Healing.
It’s possible, it’s real … we can make it happen …
Together.
I’m so pleased that I went with this desire to share Quantum Information with you, because I know many of you have been asking for it!
I have thoroughly enjoyed the challenge of writing this 2 part series and I look forward, as always, to answering your questions and comments.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Hi Sofia,
it’s my pleasure 🙂
Mel xo
Dear Melanie.
Here is me, walking along listening to the radio cast of this blog, in the dark with my dogs . . . responding aloud with cries of oh! and ah! and such. Two of the books you mentioned recently passed through my hands. I can hardly wait to get them now and read them. Also, I can hardly wait to get home tonight from work, re-listen to this article while I walk my dogs, then come home and read the article and watch the video clips you have attached.
Thank you, dear angel, for all the research you put into this and for healing yourself and passing along all this truth and hope for us! You are an amazing teacher!!
Love,
Renee(Renfree from your Thriver Community)
Hi Renee,
I love that this article has resonated with you.
How fabbo these books have made their way into your life … sooooo worth reading!
You are so welcome Renee, and I love that we can share this incredible journey of growth and liberation together.
Bless you dear one.
Mel xo
Melanie,
thanks you. This is so really interesting, although a bit scaring for me (probably due to my own traumas). You are totally right, I’m that kind of person that wants to figure out with logics, I do that so much. Not to speak about entanglements…It’s like every person I meet leaves a fingerprint on me, let alone the Narcissist, 1 year NC and I don’t even “think” or obsess about him anymore but I can “feel” him like he’s s a ghost.
I’d like to answer you some questions..
While reading this, I wondered…What is our Left Brain for then? It resonates with me that we over-use it, but if everything is up to the Unconscious, then what is the purpose of the Logical Mind?
Also, how can one access the subconscious and change it if it is so unaccessible and powerful? How do you “hack” it if you can’t do it with the Logical Mind?
And lastly Melanie, a question that means the world to me…If Reality is a hologram, what is Real and what is Manipulation? What is Authentic and what is Delusion? Can we really tell? Can really a “Truth” exist without judgement of what is good and bad? How can we tell when we’re deceiving ourselves if nothing is real?…
I always find myself wondering if what I feel is “real” and true.
It is an amazing opportunity that I can talk about this things with someone. I have been asking this questions to myself for so long and it isn’t really stuff you can talk with people Thank you!
xx
Sorry for my mistakes in english, it’s not my first language xx
Hi Lucy,
I relate, I promise I too used to be so “in my head” … and yes letting that go is scary at first, because we think all of those thoughts and defenses “trying to work it all out” keep us safe – when in fact they don’t – they just keep us trapped in anxiety.
And it’s so interesting that when we are trying to work out “the outside” and “everyone else” in order to feel safe, then we are always entangled up and never free to just “be” ourselves.
I love your questions and I am happy to answer them!
Ok re our left brain, we have one so that we can think, plan, take in data and create and organise our lives and progress forward.
The left brain is free to do its thing healthily when not ruled by the subconscious programs of trauma. Then it is an “aid” that is about “Creation” and not stuck in “trying to Survive”.
In other words it can be put to use as expansion, inspiration and love when the subconscious is clean and free of wounding – and not until.
Regarding accessing and reprogramming the subconscious, the tool I developed to do so is Quanta Freedom Healing. You can read up on it here: https://www.melanietoniaevans.com/services/quanta-healing-explained.htm
QFH is the 10 step formula in the Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program (NARP) https://www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp and the reason why there have been so many successful Thriver Recoveries in this Community.
For your last question … there is no “real” absolute. Ten people could watch one scene and all have a different version of “reality”. If we are waiting to be “told” what is real or not we are a victim to life.
What is real for us Lucy is always going to be in accordance with our beliefs and perceptions of life. So therefore if we are suffering “realities” that are not pleasing we need to change our inner program on those topics.
This is where we get to be The Creator – we can decide and program, heal and develop what we wish our reality to be.
When we “be” it – it will “come”.
(It was always doing this anyway…)
That is what the true meaning for “becoming” something is.
So really Lucy – there is no right or wrong – there is only what is or isn’t serving us in relation to the Life we want to live.
And when we start living life in alignment with releasing trauma out of our body and bringing in Source (space) to replace it – we simply start living organically as our highest and best selves.
Especially if we are prepared to self-partner and confront those parts of ourselves that suffer negative emotion, constriction, fear, defence, envy, resentment and all the other uncomfortable painful feelings that are signalling that we are not living a True Self state.
THAT is all we need to listen to and work with – the up-levelling of those.
Then we start to feel in our bodies somatic peace, solidness, warmth, love, inspiration and all the good stuff – that is our True Self state without our trauma.
That is no more “real” than False Self states … misery, depression, hopelessness – they are just as “real” if we are experiencing them ..
But which version of real do we want to generate within ourselves?
I hope this has helped Lucy … and please ask any more questions that you may need to.
Mel xo
Thanks Mel,
I have really appreciated this dialogue with you and I really do appreciate your vision of things. I have watched lots of your videos this days and I loved “What is self love?”, I linked it to my teenage sister -since we didn’t get much of self-love classes from mom and dad…- I loved the idea that evolution is a right, not an obligation…Sometimes we just skip to wanting to fix others to wanting to fix ourselves And that’s the problem I have with lots of self development …You know what, I found myself in bed crying the other day feeling..”I don’t want to fix myself!! I want just be without torturing myself with “what I should be”…
This exchange has really been food for thought these days and ironically made me realize how much I think and how stupid that after the Narc I try so hard to figure reality (in general) instead of letting it be, as if that’s gonna heal me…The thing is , when I am wondering stuff like : is there any “out there” or not? Does reality exist? Was our love ever real? What am I “supposed to do” in order to change?” That’s only partly my curiosity and partly a “survival program” as you call it, a lot of it is about not accepting Life – even myself- as a mystery. It is about not validating what I feel and needing a “theory” around it.
So, thanks for crossing my path…And yes, I will ask more questions in the future, I always have plenty of them 🙂
With much love,
L. xx
thank you Melanie !
Hi Becky,
you are so welcome 🙂
Mel xo
Thank you Mel. You blow me away with your knowledge and understanding. I’ve read so many of these spiritual books but you have brought all the pieces together so it totally clicks. I understand now why I could never manifest anything good with law of attraction. How could I when I was full of self loathing. I truly believe you should write a book for the masses of people who are now ready to know this. You make it so readable and easy to understand. I see this as another big seller in the vein of Rhonda Byrnes The Secret. She wasn’t writing anything new but it was presented and marketed in such a way that it opened the door to give millions of people knowledge about spirituality and the truth. I think your work would help so many not just the narcissistic abused and help create that new world faster. Many many thanks.
Hi Dee,
you are so welcome. I am so glad the pieces came together for you!
Thank you for your lovely comments and I would one day love to help not just those who have been N-abused to break free from their pain and limitations, and help the birth of our New World.
Mel xo
I also meant to say you are an earth angel Mel. I only started on computer and web late August as I had no confidence. It was spooky how I stumbled across your website but that was Divine intervention. I know when I’m reading the truth as my body almost vibrates with resonation. I started the programme in Noveber and already feel much improvement. Yesterday I felt different then realised my God I felt happiness. Long long time since I experienced that. You’ve saved my sanity and my life. I was dead inside and thought I was nuts. Xx
Oh Dee,
I am so thrilled NARP has helped you so much. Divine synchronicity is gorgeous.
Bless you!
Keep up the great work 🙂
Mel xo
Wow!!!! Thank you so much for putting this info all together- it feels like quantum physics “clicked” in my mind. Brings new meaning to “perception is reality ” . The concepts of superposition and entanglement makes so much sense. What I’m thinking is that our past negative experiences created entanglements, and our unconscious self has a focus there that collapses the wave, making those issues our reality. So, when quanta healing occurs, those entanglements are released, the waves flow, and along with the waves come God/life/ all possibilities. I’m blown away with quantum thoughts! My concept of reality has radically changed. Reality is the ultimate superposition, and since we are all one, we “see” car, blue, trees relatively the same way. Individual entanglements impact everyone, in both the physical and non- physical levels. Imagine what will happen when more and more people wake up, the entire network of perceptions will change. So. Cool.
Hi Michelle,
you are so welcome! I so love how you have encapsulated this – I don’t know if I could have put it better myself.
So, so true that when we change our inside programming then we do break free from unhealthy enmeshment and collapse the wave down completely differently.
Yes, agreed Michelle how cool it will be when people are no longer making perceptions out of damaged filters of fear, pain and judgement.
If will be a different and healed world.
Mel xo
Hi Melanie, I am so grateful for this information. I live in such an unconscious environment, however I have transcended that very environment beginning with N abuse and ending with Quantum Freedom Healing. This information allows me to take it to the next level. One thing I am aware of though, is I still think of the N and specifically in this way. I want him to know how well I am doing and what he missed out on. It’s been 4 years and I have had no contact. I am thriving…thanks to you and your program. My question is…what weed do I need to pull out to get rid of my need for this vengence I am seeking. Why do I still think about him?
Hi Annie,
That’s great that you enjoyed this article series.
I am so pleased you have been working with QFH and are now taking your journey to higher consciousness.
Annie, as with all our wounds and states that we know are limiting us and causing us pain, this is matter of deeply going into that wound inside you – tracking it through your body and releasing the energy of its origin and replacing it with the Source replacement.
Module 1 work, and / or use the Goal Setting Module and set up “the resolution and healing of this issue” and then dig out all the wound and the resistance to that goal in your shifts.
Then you will be free of it.
Truly .. that is all you have to do!
I hope this helps.
Let me know how you go …
Mel xo
this article has taken me several days to get thru, watching the vids n other vids those vids “recommend” plus thinking about it. good distillation of all those concepts.
enlightening.
Hi Helen,
I am so glad you found this enlightening! And so great that you took the time to absorb this info …
Mel xo
You’re an angel on earth….and I’m so grateful I found you and your resources. For the past several days I’ve been watching your videos and reading your articles and resources till the wee hours in the morning. I feel like I’ve really found a place I can call home as I sort through narcissist abuse I’ve experienced, past and present. An N father, a passive aggressive and complacent mother, a past N friend, and a current N friend.
I do see how we continue to attract to us what we have yet to heal in us. I know exactly where my inner wounds come from, and I embrace that those wounds are a part of me and yet as an adult I want to grow out of that inner-child place to a place of self-love and self-care and wellness. I look forward to the journey here. I wanted to let you know that this 2-part article was fantastic!
In the meantime, I could use short-term advice regarding a decades-long friendship of mine. Through the years, we didn’t see each other too often, maybe once a month or every-other month or so. During the past two years we’ve spent a lot of time together due to changes in our work and personal lives. I’ve spent a lot of time around her family, and her extended family. Lots of time. Let’s just say what I came to discover wasn’t pretty. The internal family wrath of my friend found a new and sitting target—a middle-aged woman who hadn’t yet healed her own childhood wounds from the inside out—me. Not knowing any better, I became the fixer. I focused on her, instead of myself. You can guess where this went so I’ll fast forward to now. I’ve experienced lots of narcissist aggression and it’s escalated in recent months. By the way, I have 5 other women friends with whom I have very healthy relationships of mutual trust and respect. Thankfully.
Everything I’ve researched has focused on what narcissism is, but until I found you I found little information on how to handle it. I have to get control of me and that’s exactly how I found you!!! Thank God. The anxiety I’ve felt has been intense. I know it will shift with my own personal accountability and ongoing journey of self-knowledge and healing. But what do I do with my friend in the meantime? Do I just go no-contact? Do I have an exit discussion?
I feel like letting her know “I’m moving in a different direction and aligning with people who have shared values and needs in friendship, and we don’t have that. And with all the self-love in my heart, I’m choosing to honor my own needs, and I set you free to honor yours, and I wish you well.” Really, what do you do? She has told me that none of her long-term female relationships last and she can’t figure out why. Well now I know.
I haven’t gotten much sleep in the past few days as I’ve been devouring your free information and videos. Just fantastic perspective and examples. I won’t see my friend for about a week. Any ideas on how to handle my next interaction with her? I’m ok to let our friendship go and I don’t hold out any hope she will honor my boundaries going forward. The situation is only getting worse.
Thank you SO much. I’m so glad to have found you and once again, I’m excited to continue down the path of self-love, self-healing, and personal responsibility so I can up-level to a new world of possibilities. I just didn’t realize I was wearing the ruby slippers all along …..
Hi Jules,
thank you for your lovey comment!
I am so pleased my information is resonating with you, and you understand the “inside out” orientation to healing.
Regarding the narcissistic friend that you are going to cut ties with – really either way can work … but this is the catch …
If you were to send her an email (as an example) stating your truth you need to be really clear that if there is a tricky response which there could be designed to hook you and project onto you, that you do NOT respond any further.
An “exit statement” needs to be a boundary – meaning it is not reliant on her getting it – it is only reliant on YOU getting it.
If your motivation is to try and “teach” her something – then it is “conditional”. And when we do anything “conditional” if it does not have the follow up response of the “condition” then we are hooked again.
Your motivation needs to be “unconditional”, because that is the ONLY healthy and wholesome exit statement motivation … “This is my truth and I totally don’t even care or need you to get anything at all in regard to it”
(Feel the freedom in that … )
If you can really check in with yourself and know you are susceptible to being hooked by her response (or even non-response) then I would not do it – I would simply go no-contact.
Silence is pretty golden, and truly it does say all that is needed to say … “My silence and zero contact means ‘you are NOT My Reality’ … and truly after someone has been abusive we don’t owe them anything – we simply owe a responsibility of “health” to ourselves.
And I LOVE that you understand you ARE wearing the ruby slippers … like we all are.
I really hope that my response has helped.
Mel xo
Hello Melanie, when I first started following you about 2 years ago I focused on every bit of information about the N. I remember coming across one of your blogs about taking the responsibility for myself. I was horrified, angry and thought impossible – I cannot be responsible. I kept reading and kept coming back to read more – then it happened. I was left no choice but to leave – the fear of staying overcame the fear of the unknown. I was escorted out of my home by the police. I was only allowed to take my clothes and just a few personal items like my hairdryer – I was a wreak – I look back and I am shocked I was even functioning on any level. It became so bad I thought of suicide …then he was charged with Criminal Harassment and life took a bit of a turn – I went to a women’s domestic violence course of 10 weeks – in this group they also mentioned taking responsibility for our own choices – that we can only change ourselves. I remember you saying the same thing..so I came back and read more – I started reading ones that pertained to me healing myself. I met a spiritual coach and she worked on my energy levels – cutting the threads that bound me and the N energetically. I don’t know all the terms just yet but what I have come to embrace is believing we are all one with the Universe – that good positive energy radiated out is a beautiful, wonderful place to be. I had a slip back – he got off of the Criminal Harassment charge and the order of protection was removed today. I fell back into fear and what a dark ugly place that it is – I knew I had to get back..so I found your article today and I went outside and said hello to the universe – the sun beat down and I was filled with love. I lost everything, I am facing bankruptcy and I live in a room that my friends gave me to live in but I am free – I am free to choose to love and give love – I am free to live my life to whatever I choose it to be… with that said I know I have a way to go since I just slipped back recently..today is a good day.. but I know with the order lifted I will have to face what will come my way – I wish to do it with the strength and the love that is all around me – I am in Ontario, Canada – is there any support groups that follow the Quantum theory? Is there a work book I can purchase? I know this is my journey..this is the path to follow – YOU are the one that gave me hope – you are the one that has guided me 2 years ago from the beginning when I typed in google how to deal with a bully in a relationship – I cannot thank you enough… you saved my life… I believe my purpose is to carry on with this in some way of fashion ..I just have to get there first. Thank you for listening.. hugs xox Carol
Hi Carol,
I am so sorry you have had such a hard journey – as many of us also had as a part of our awakening …
This is wonderful, however, that it has led you back to yourself and that you have found true love within and flowing through you as you.
It is so, so true that once we have a taste of that and fall back into victim feelings and fear that the difference is like day and night.
I love your orientation now – it is wonderful 🙂
Carol the incredible support Group that is this orientation is the NARP Program https://www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp and the NARP Private Forum –
https://www.melanietoniaevans.com/member/
That is the exact path of Quantum Healing which has created so many Thriver Recoveries in this Community, with systems that are unique to anything else available in the world.
I am so pleased you did find your way here Carol and that I have been able to help you …
Yes it is your time! You are so welcome Carol and many blessings to you too.
Mel xo
Thank you and ongoing recovery here:
https://www.gofundme.com/letitgonpdsurvivor
This lady is quite brilliant. I have been immersed in a small portion of her prolific output and I must offer my deepest compliments. To me she is unquestionably extremely gifted. All of this has been profoundly helpful to my journey. As I always say after doing a module….Thank you Melanie.
Hi Melanie,
For quite some time now I’ve been following u on fb n also reading ur blogs. I’m goin through my own journey of my awakening process…tats watt I would prefer to call it. Its diff..not at all easy. But I can relate to watt u r saying abt quantum healing…although I don’t really feel it at present. I know..hv experienced watt it means for life to b in d flow until we try to block it wit our actions. Tats when all hell starts…when we stop listening to tat inner voice! Pray tat I too find my breakthrough soon. Thanx for all ur writing on Narcs….helped a lot.
dear melanie, thank you so very much for your wonderful work 💖💖💖 you helped me soooooo much 💖💖💖 do you know this video from eckhart tolle it is also interesting? much love aloha 💖
The Prison of Narcissism – Eckhart Tolle
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dLLB7daSttY