Narcissistic Abuse Recovery – How Long Will It Take?

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 7
50
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 7
50
  It is shocking for so many people, how long the trauma of narcissistic abuse plagues them. Trying to recovery from narcissistic abuse can be one of the most frustrating and devastating journeys we could ever take. It can feel like one step forward and two (or more) back! Why is this the case? Why, even when we leave a narcissist and get out of the war zone, does the anxiety and deep depression continue? It is all to do with how we understand and deal with emotional pain. As well as learning and embracing what the trauma is really for and how to transmute it … in ways that not just liberate us from it, but also release us quickly and powerfully into freedom and joy. (more…)

 

It is shocking for so many people, how long the trauma of narcissistic abuse plagues them.

Trying to recovery from narcissistic abuse can be one of the most frustrating and devastating journeys we could ever take.

It can feel like one step forward and two (or more) back!

Why is this the case? Why, even when we leave a narcissist and get out of the war zone, does the anxiety and deep depression continue?

It is all to do with how we understand and deal with emotional pain.

As well as learning and embracing what the trauma is really for and how to transmute it … in ways that not just liberate us from it, but also release us quickly and powerfully into freedom and joy.

Will I Ever Feel The Same Attraction I Felt With The Narcissist?

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 3
61
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 3
61
  Have you ever had the agonising issue of being head over heels attracted to someone who is totally bad for you? And …. even though this person abuses you and is impossible to create a healthy, safe and happy life with, you feel like they are your perfect match? This is the traumatic world of being connected with a narcissist lover, where I promise you SO many people have reported the same thing! In fact, some people when they first connected with a narcissist, felt this heart explosion … “This is The One” (yours truly included), and then ... when the relationship blows up and ends (as relationships with narcissists are apt to do)  there is a forlorn emptiness of missing and obsessing about the ex-partner. As well as, devastatingly, a benign non-existent attraction to anyone else. (more…)

 

Have you ever had the agonising issue of being head over heels attracted to someone who is totally bad for you?

And …. even though this person abuses you and is impossible to create a healthy, safe and happy life with, you feel like they are your perfect match?

This is the traumatic world of being connected with a narcissist lover, where I promise you SO many people have reported the same thing!

In fact, some people when they first connected with a narcissist, felt this heart explosion … “This is The One” (yours truly included), and then … when the relationship blows up and ends (as relationships with narcissists are apt to do)  there is a forlorn emptiness of missing and obsessing about the ex-partner.

As well as, devastatingly, a benign non-existent attraction to anyone else.

Why Grey Rock Alone Won’t Keep You Safe From Narcissists

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 5
37
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 5
37
  If you have asked for help on the internet or read articles on how to deal with a narcissist, chances are you have heard of the The Grey Rock Method. If you haven't heard of it, the Grey Rock Method involves switching off, showing no emotion and providing nothing that attracts a narcissist into granting energy back – by us becoming so boring and lifeless to the narcissist that they simply don't see us as a source of supply any more. Using the Grey Rock method is intended to help us reach the biggest goal we have with a narcissist, which is to detach and get well … mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. But often detaching and offering up “no energy”, to cut off narcissistic supply to narcissist, isn’t enough for us to get there … (more…)

 

If you have asked for help on the internet or read articles on how to deal with a narcissist, chances are you have heard of the The Grey Rock Method.

If you haven’t heard of it, the Grey Rock Method involves switching off, showing no emotion and providing nothing that attracts a narcissist into granting energy back – by us becoming so boring and lifeless to the narcissist that they simply don’t see us as a source of supply any more.

Using the Grey Rock method is intended to help us reach the biggest goal we have with a narcissist, which is to detach and get well … mentally, emotionally, physically and financially.

But often detaching and offering up “no energy”, to cut off narcissistic supply to narcissist, isn’t enough for us to get there …

What To Do If You Feel Like You’re Too Old To Recover From Abuse

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 4
48
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 4
48
  This is one of the most painful questions people ask … It is so understandable, after being narcissistically abused, to think that you have thrown the best years of your life away … and that it’s now too late to create a great life. And let’s face it – it’s very unlikely that you have ended a relationship in a supported state, where you are healthy, happy and buoyantly able to move forward. In fact, the exact opposite is usually true – you’ve lost a lot, and especially your confidence and faith in Life and yourself. You may have been set back years – emotionally, mentally, physically and financially. And of course it feels like the dreams that you had worked hard to accomplish have been thwarted! (more…)

 

This is one of the most painful questions people ask …

It is so understandable, after being narcissistically abused, to think that you have thrown the best years of your life away … and that it’s now too late to create a great life.

And let’s face it – it’s very unlikely that you have ended a relationship in a supported state, where you are healthy, happy and buoyantly able to move forward.

In fact, the exact opposite is usually true – you’ve lost a lot, and especially your confidence and faith in Life and yourself.

You may have been set back years – emotionally, mentally, physically and financially.

And of course it feels like the dreams that you had worked hard to accomplish have been thwarted!

They Told Me I Would Never Recover Part 2

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 2
35
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 2
35
  In Part One, I shared with you the intimate details about my breakdown, awakening and how my life was changed forever. Please watch Part One first if you haven't already. In this episode, Part Two, I share with you the numerous epiphanies I received shortly after my awakening, which took me from a person entrenched to living life from the outside in to one living life – for the FIRST time in my life – to the inside out. And how I had finally realised that the broken parts of myself that had been with me all of my life, had been unconsciously involved in my patterns with painful and disappointing relationships – and that this had nothing to do with “blaming myself” and rather everything to do with loving those parts of me back to wholeness. (more…)

 

In Part One, I shared with you the intimate details about my breakdown, awakening and how my life was changed forever.

Please watch Part One first if you haven’t already.

In this episode, Part Two, I share with you the numerous epiphanies I received shortly after my awakening, which took me from a person entrenched to living life from the outside in to one living life – for the FIRST time in my life – to the inside out.

And how I had finally realised that the broken parts of myself that had been with me all of my life, had been unconsciously involved in my patterns with painful and disappointing relationships – and that this had nothing to do with “blaming myself” and rather everything to do with loving those parts of me back to wholeness.

They Told Me I Would Never Recover

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 8
27
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 8
27
  I got to thinking this week, even though I have shared details of my personal story on my website and in my Free Webinar, I know there are many of you who don’t know the full details of my own experience. Maybe you are one of those people who haven’t heard my full story, and are wondering how I got to where I am today. So, I thought what better way than to share the explicit details in a more imitate way than I ever have -  on Thriver TV. Because … I know I am not alone. I am not the first person to have an incurable diagnosis that was supposed to be the end of my Life as I knew it … and ... (more…)

 

I got to thinking this week, even though I have shared details of my personal story on my website and in my Free Webinar, I know there are many of you who don’t know the full details of my own experience.

Maybe you are one of those people who haven’t heard my full story, and are wondering how I got to where I am today.

So, I thought what better way than to share the explicit details in a more imitate way than I ever have –  on Thriver TV.

Because … I know I am not alone. I am not the first person to have an incurable diagnosis that was supposed to be the end of my Life as I knew it … and …

How To Set Boundaries With A Narcissist If You Can’t Go No Contact Part 2

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 10
40
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 10
40
  In Part One of this series, we investigated many of the energetic truths regarding how to operate in the vicinity of narcissists who we can’t go No Contact with. And how our goal is to detach, grant them no narcissistic supply and grow up those parts of ourselves that used to get triggered and hooked into their shenanigans; understanding that when we stop granting energy, the narcissist must put their energy onto obtaining narcissistic supply from a much easier source. In Part Two, my desire is to illustrate some fundamental differences between a) People who are still hooked in through unhealed parts, b) Those who are working with Grey Rock, but are still hooked in through unhealed parts and c) People who are firmly dedicated to working at evolving themselves, and have placed their personal evolution and showing up authentically as their most important life mission. (more…)

 

In Part One of this series, we investigated many of the energetic truths regarding how to operate in the vicinity of narcissists who we can’t go No Contact with.

And how our goal is to detach, grant them no narcissistic supply and grow up those parts of ourselves that used to get triggered and hooked into their shenanigans; understanding that when we stop granting energy, the narcissist must put their energy onto obtaining narcissistic supply from a much easier source.

In Part Two, my desire is to illustrate some fundamental differences between a) People who are still hooked in through unhealed parts, b) Those who are working with Grey Rock, but are still hooked in through unhealed parts and c) People who are firmly dedicated to working at evolving themselves, and have placed their personal evolution and showing up authentically as their most important life mission.

How To Set Boundaries With A Narcissist If You Can’t Go No Contact

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 14
99
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
Permalink 14
99
  If you’ve been a member of this community for more than a little while, you will know I passionately believe it's best to create No Contact with a toxic person as soon as possible. This grants you the space to turn inward and begin healing yourself, without the daily episodes that trigger your deepest unconscious wounds, sending you ten steps backwards, rather than making your way forward. But what if this person is not someone you can cut out of your life right away? You might have children or an existing business with this person, or an ongoing settlement or divorce that hasn’t taken place yet. (more…)

 

If you’ve been a member of this community for more than a little while, you will know I passionately believe it’s best to create No Contact with a toxic person as soon as possible.

This grants you the space to turn inward and begin healing yourself, without the daily episodes that trigger your deepest unconscious wounds, sending you ten steps backwards, rather than making your way forward.

But what if this person is not someone you can cut out of your life right away?

You might have children or an existing business with this person, or an ongoing settlement or divorce that hasn’t taken place yet.