Melanie Tonia Evans

My Most Debilitating Narcissistic Abuse Hook (And How I Healed From It)

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  A lot of people believe I am self-assured, confident and have created a great life, and that is very true. After my Thriver Recovery from narcissistic abuse, I am blessed to be living a life that at one point I would have considered an impossibility. But this wasn't always the case ... What I am going to share with your today, is information that I have never shared with this Community before. I believe this, not only is this healthy for me to be authentic with you about, it may also help free you from shame and pain as well. So ... today I'm going to share something about my past, a dirty secret that I was once terribly ashamed of. (more…)

 

A lot of people believe I am self-assured, confident and have created a great life, and that is very true. After my Thriver Recovery from narcissistic abuse, I am blessed to be living a life that at one point I would have considered an impossibility.

But this wasn’t always the case …

What I am going to share with your today, is information that I have never shared with this Community before.

I believe this, not only is this healthy for me to be authentic with you about, it may also help free you from shame and pain as well.

So … today I’m going to share something about my past, a dirty secret that I was once terribly ashamed of.

How To Heal The Wounds From Narcissistic Mothers

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  In this Thriver TV episode today, I want to deeply acknowledge with you the devastating effects of Mother wounds, and the trauma this has caused for so many of you in this Community. What does it mean for you if your Mother did not fulfill what a stereotypical Mother does, such as care, nurture, and support? How does this affect your ability to feel whole, worthy and confident in Life? And what is it like to still be caught up in the battle of feeling like no matter what you do it is never good enough? Or to still feel like you are receiving abuse, neglect, or being scapegoated for her issues that she is not taking responsibility for? (more…)

 

In this Thriver TV episode today, I want to deeply acknowledge with you the devastating effects of Mother wounds, and the trauma this has caused for so many of you in this Community.

What does it mean for you if your Mother did not fulfill what a stereotypical Mother does, such as care, nurture, and support?

How does this affect your ability to feel whole, worthy and confident in Life?

And what is it like to still be caught up in the battle of feeling like no matter what you do it is never good enough? Or to still feel like you are receiving abuse, neglect, or being scapegoated for her issues that she is not taking responsibility for?

The 5 Ways A Narcissist Gets Under Your Skin

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  Narcissists get under our skin – absolutely. They infiltrate your psyche, your emotions and your soul. Last week I talked about “Wetiko” the human psychic virus, and this week I want to take this a step further and talk with you about what happens when a narcissist (a horrible manifestation of the Wetiko virus) has infiltrated us. It is a phenomenon, because how does one one human being affect another human being so profoundly to the point where you can barely operate? In this Thriver TV episode I am going to explain to you the exact five ways that narcissists get into our Inner Being. (more…)

 

Narcissists get under our skin – absolutely. They infiltrate your psyche, your emotions and your soul.

Last week I talked about “Wetiko” the human psychic virus, and this week I want to take this a step further and talk with you about what happens when a narcissist (a horrible manifestation of the Wetiko virus) has infiltrated us.

It is a phenomenon, because how does one one human being affect another human being so profoundly to the point where you can barely operate?

In this Thriver TV episode I am going to explain to you the exact five ways that narcissists get into our Inner Being.

Emotional Blackmail – The Devastating Weapon A Narcissist Uses To Betray You

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  Today's episode is about a tragic situation you may have, or may still be dealing with, as a result of getting involved with a narcissist ... When they turn the tables and use your sensitive information against you. At first we did not realize that a narcissist is like the CIA building a dossier of information on us. We simply thought their attentiveness and attention was about genuine affection ... but the truth is it was about something much more sinister. (more…)

 

Today’s episode is about a tragic situation you may have, or may still be dealing with, as a result of getting involved with a narcissist …

When they turn the tables and use your sensitive information against you.

At first we did not realize that a narcissist is like the CIA building a dossier of information on us.

We simply thought their attentiveness and attention was about genuine affection … but the truth is it was about something much more sinister.

What To Do When A Narcissist Swiftly Replaces You And Flaunts Their New Supply

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  Is there any more soul crushing and punishing thing in our life than to be replaced with another love partner? Possibly not. And how horrifying is it to see the evidence of the narcissist and their new lover plastered all over social media enjoying a wonderful loved up time, whilst we can barely get out of bed, let alone function normally. If we have been discarded and replaced in a heartbeat, and the narcissist is cruelly rubbing our nose in it, the trauma may be so horrific that we feel like we want to literally die. (more…)

 

Is there any more soul crushing and punishing thing in our life than to be replaced with another love partner?

Possibly not.

And how horrifying is it to see the evidence of the narcissist and their new lover plastered all over social media enjoying a wonderful loved up time, whilst we can barely get out of bed, let alone function normally.

If we have been discarded and replaced in a heartbeat, and the narcissist is cruelly rubbing our nose in it, the trauma may be so horrific that we feel like we want to literally die.

What To Do When The Narcissist Infiltrates Your Dreams

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  One of the most disturbing things about narcissistic abuse is that it often comes after you, even as you sleep. Just when you think you can get some relief from the aching torment of your waking life, the trauma insidiously finds its way into your dreams. Giving you nightmares. And they are horrible ones ... filled with big emotional content, charges and trauma. What do they mean? In this episode I want to share with you what they mean, as well as how to heal yourself to a level where you simply will not experience these awful narcissistic dreams anymore. (more…)

 

One of the most disturbing things about narcissistic abuse is that it often comes after you, even as you sleep.

Just when you think you can get some relief from the aching torment of your waking life, the trauma insidiously finds its way into your dreams.

Giving you nightmares.

And they are horrible ones … filled with big emotional content, charges and trauma.

What do they mean?

In this episode I want to share with you what they mean, as well as how to heal yourself to a level where you simply will not experience these awful narcissistic dreams anymore.

How I Healed From Adrenal Malfunction After Being Told It Was Incurable

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  Adrenal malfunction is serious and it is a chronic problem for so many people in this Community. It’s the common by-product of the horrific impact of narcissistic abuse – when our stress hormones go into overdrive trying to cope with the crazy-making, the unsafe twists, turns and stunts that narcissists do, as well as the malicious, unthinkable trauma they bring into our lives and to the people who we love. When our adrenals no longer function as they should, our ability to switch of fight or flee is severely compromised and the symptoms are debilitating to say the least. They include such things as hair loss, appetite problems, sleeping disorders, premature aging, the risk of heart attack or stroke, and many other dis-eases due to a stressed immune system – including cancer. (more…)

 

Adrenal malfunction is serious and it is a chronic problem for so many people in this Community.

It’s the common by-product of the horrific impact of narcissistic abuse – when our stress hormones go into overdrive trying to cope with the crazy-making, the unsafe twists, turns and stunts that narcissists do, as well as the malicious, unthinkable trauma they bring into our lives and to the people who we love.

When our adrenals no longer function as they should, our ability to switch of fight or flee is severely compromised and the symptoms are debilitating to say the least.

They include such things as hair loss, appetite problems, sleeping disorders, premature aging, the risk of heart attack or stroke, and many other dis-eases due to a stressed immune system – including cancer.

Conquering The Terror Of Being With Another Narcissist

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  It is very healthy, normal and human to want to love and be loved – and one of the grandest ways we can experience this is through intimate love relationships. Yet, after having our hearts, souls and life smashed by narcissists, we may concede it is safer to go without love at this level than ever run the risk of being abused again. Or … maybe we are trying to find love, yet are continually experiencing connections with men and women, which are disappointing, painful or even downright scary! I totally GET IT … That is exactly how I used to feel as well after being narcissistically abused. Initially, I was alone for three and half years, because any time I tried to date, the only people who were coming into my orbit were seriously disordered and unsuitable … and I felt even more traumatised as a result of trying. (more…)

 

It is very healthy, normal and human to want to love and be loved – and one of the grandest ways we can experience this is through intimate love relationships.

Yet, after having our hearts, souls and life smashed by narcissists, we may concede it is safer to go without love at this level than ever run the risk of being abused again.

Or … maybe we are trying to find love, yet are continually experiencing connections with men and women, which are disappointing, painful or even downright scary!

I totally GET IT … That is exactly how I used to feel as well after being narcissistically abused.

Initially, I was alone for three and half years, because any time I tried to date, the only people who were coming into my orbit were seriously disordered and unsuitable … and I felt even more traumatised as a result of trying.

How To Break The Psychic Connection With A Narcissist

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  I truly believe the hardest bond to break with a narcissist is the one we can’t see … The psychic tie. So many people report this – the terrible feeling like the narcissist still lives on inside of them – the abusive voice in their head, the reoccurring nightmares … and the feeling like the narcissist is coursing through their veins like shards of ice, or a foul black ink. When we are living with this psychic infiltration we feel polluted. We feel like we may NEVER get free of this feeling. And it is so hard to exist with it … because our Life-force is being sucked out of us no matter what we do to block, cut off or escape the connection. (more…)

 

I truly believe the hardest bond to break with a narcissist is the one we can’t see …

The psychic tie.

So many people report this – the terrible feeling like the narcissist still lives on inside of them – the abusive voice in their head, the reoccurring nightmares … and the feeling like the narcissist is coursing through their veins like shards of ice, or a foul black ink.

When we are living with this psychic infiltration we feel polluted.

We feel like we may NEVER get free of this feeling.

And it is so hard to exist with it … because our Life-force is being sucked out of us no matter what we do to block, cut off or escape the connection.

What To Do If You Feel Like You’re Too Old To Recover From Abuse

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
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  This is one of the most painful questions people ask … It is so understandable, after being narcissistically abused, to think that you have thrown the best years of your life away … and that it’s now too late to create a great life. And let’s face it – it’s very unlikely that you have ended a relationship in a supported state, where you are healthy, happy and buoyantly able to move forward. In fact, the exact opposite is usually true – you’ve lost a lot, and especially your confidence and faith in Life and yourself. You may have been set back years – emotionally, mentally, physically and financially. And of course it feels like the dreams that you had worked hard to accomplish have been thwarted! (more…)

 

This is one of the most painful questions people ask …

It is so understandable, after being narcissistically abused, to think that you have thrown the best years of your life away … and that it’s now too late to create a great life.

And let’s face it – it’s very unlikely that you have ended a relationship in a supported state, where you are healthy, happy and buoyantly able to move forward.

In fact, the exact opposite is usually true – you’ve lost a lot, and especially your confidence and faith in Life and yourself.

You may have been set back years – emotionally, mentally, physically and financially.

And of course it feels like the dreams that you had worked hard to accomplish have been thwarted!