Comments on: How To Become A Boundary Boss https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/ Devastated by a narcissist? Melanie's Narcissism blog offers support & empowering tools to heal & thrive after narcissistic abuse, gain a new life & fulfilling relationships. Tue, 26 Oct 2021 20:55:22 +0000 hourly 1 By: Molly https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1258181 Tue, 26 Oct 2021 20:55:22 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1258181 In reply to Kat.

Ok, So thank you Melanie for another great article.

I hope I will be able to continue posting, as my narcissist is not only a smear campaign expert but also a hacker and I have had computer issues for years. Now since I have been on this site and posting, I have had difficulty with posting stuff, but I will persevere!!
I have had major upheavals in my life since I started setting boundaries. My narcissist wants to control my every movement i.e. (what I wear, how I do my hair, what I eat, what I feel, what I think). But I have set boundaries and stated that I am not comfortable with this type of behavior and that my private life is my private life. My narcissist then launched into a smear campaign trying to make everyone believe I am mentally ill. Unfortunately this person is a GOOD manipulator. But I don’t care how manipulative they are, I STILL WILL SET my boundaries and what the narcissists fly into their rages. Since my narcissist is so controlling and has access to me, I do worry for my safety often. Is there a point a which we should just lie to the narcissist and pretend we agree so that they do not harm up physically or harm our loved ones etc…

]]> By: Jennifer https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1257472 Sun, 17 Oct 2021 03:34:24 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1257472 I was just guided by my gps to get some Melanie guidance and this is so apropo. Thank you!
I have a woman neighbor who is N and asks for help when she’s away checking on a package or other small tasks when away, something I’m happy to help a neighbor with, unless I”m not available. I set that boundary for the first time last week because I was busy getting ready for my first concert since covid. Not only did she not respect my basic boundary but sent me reactive texts. When I calmly told her the other day (thanks for all my growth in NARP!) I needed to be spoken to in other-than-one-word texts, she sent me a page long email. I let her know I was available to speak in person but would not be reading it. She refused to do that (she wouldn’t be in control!). She responded with several more reactive texts.

Sigh, of course I want to have great relationships with my neighbors but this was a long-overdue boundary setting and it’s great to be learning how to be calm and respectful of my voice and speak up, accepting and embracing my truth and the letting the chips fall as they may, loving my soul shining and bright. I will not dim myself for anyone any longer.

]]> By: KB https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1257467 Sun, 17 Oct 2021 00:53:14 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1257467 In reply to Hazel.

I had a similar situation myself with dating & was honest and clear about forming a friendship with trust before any physical relationship. He agreed that he wanted the same but then I started to feel pressured in a nonverbal way to be more physical. I continued listening to my inner voice & kept my boundaries. After a nice dinner/movie date he texted me the next day saying he needed more physically and said some rude comments before ending things with me. I took it as a positive affirmation that I held my boundaries & listened to myself. It showed me who he really was & now I can move forward knowing I trusted myself!

]]> By: peggy b https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1257423 Fri, 15 Oct 2021 13:38:09 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1257423 This is so good it lets me know that I am on the right track for healing. I find myself not cowering down to my abuser instead my voice speaks out againt things which are abusive to me.

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1257384 Thu, 14 Oct 2021 22:28:59 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1257384 In reply to I.

Hi I,

truly the breakthrough for you is the healing of you that gets disarmed through this.

So that you can stand in your truth regardless of what others do or don’t do.

Great awareness and sending you love and healing.

Mel 🙏💞🦋

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1257383 Thu, 14 Oct 2021 22:27:17 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1257383 In reply to Peter.

You are so welcome Peter,

as always!

It’s brilliant that you are so open to the information and “teachable”.

Much love to you

Mel 🙏💞🦋

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1257382 Thu, 14 Oct 2021 22:24:17 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1257382 In reply to Col.

That’s so great Col!

I’m so happy for you!

Mel 🙏💞🦋

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1257381 Thu, 14 Oct 2021 22:23:41 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1257381 In reply to Suz.

Thank you darling Suz!

Mel 🙏💞🦋

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-become-a-boundary-boss/#comment-1257380 Thu, 14 Oct 2021 22:23:19 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=10073#comment-1257380 In reply to Hazel.

Hi Hazel,

It’s so great this brought you clarity, because then the power, truth and alignment can come back to you!

Mel 🙏💞🦋

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