Comments on: How To Leave The Narcissist With Your Emotions Intact https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/ Devastated by a narcissist? Melanie's Narcissism blog offers support & empowering tools to heal & thrive after narcissistic abuse, gain a new life & fulfilling relationships. Sun, 21 Aug 2022 17:06:27 +0000 hourly 1 By: Kristi https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-1272596 Sun, 21 Aug 2022 17:06:27 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-1272596 Brett Gyllenskog is a maniac! He hurt me physically, emotionally and sexually for almost two years. Thanks for giving me the courage to turn him in to law enforcement.

]]> By: Joan https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-1226987 Mon, 23 Dec 2019 13:20:44 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-1226987 Dear Melanie,

Thank you for your blog. I suspect I am with an extroverted narcissist, and now know there is no dialogue with such an individual. It is what it is.

I fear leaving will be worse for our child due to business like visitation and the possibility he would take her overseas. Don’t want to go into too much detail about him or that.

I’m part of the problem too as I married in spite of red flags, and really spent more time thinking about finally marrying than taking a good hard look at who I was marrying.

Didn’t try for a second child with him as I wasn’t sure if the marriage would fall apart. It’s easier to be divorced with one child than two or more.

I know now from your blog I need to shut this individual out, not converse with him any more than is necessary, and grow up and be the consistent parent for our teenager.

Love your teaching to project well being for my child and the results I want, and when she’s ready, she’ll change, that change only happens when the individual is ready and not due to another’s nagging. Projecting she’ll take pride in her living space and grow up healthy and well adjusted.

Thank you so much for this website.

]]> By: Belinda https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-906989 Thu, 03 Aug 2017 21:59:56 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-906989 Hello

Thank you for your insightful articles and personal testimonies from Narc survivors. I had been involved with a Narcissistic for about 3.5 years.
I did not know people like this existed. I met my Narc at work. They are there to help people look for work not bed them and take them as their personal property to use and abuse. I have to forgiven myself for allowing myself to taken for granted by abused, damaged attention seeking vampire.

I experienced all of the stages, called them out on it and for some strange reason, I repeatedly gave second third and fourth chances each time hoping for a different outcome. It was never going to happen. A leopard doesn’t change it spots and narcs do not change.

I do not feel anything for person no more. I caught them in a lie with evidence of lie and they shouted out” i can Fuck who I want!” Then as nothing has happened invite me to Musuem and dinner. to add insult to injury. I discovered this old ass Narc took my wine filter. Stole it, put it in her purse. The sad thing is, if was something she really wanted I would have given it to her if she ask. Nonetheless, I went along because I knew in my spirit it was a wrap. i would never share time with them again. It was crystal clear despite all of the comments such as: I’m not seeing anybody, just taking care of Grannie and doing gardening was all just pure Bullshit.

I can tell you i have experienced alot of emotions since that night at the Museum and love is not one them.

So my comments to anyone who is even thinking for a nanosecond of taking these individuals back…
Think about this, you were subjected to every kind of STD known to man due to attention seeking behavior of the Narc and a person that truly Loves you would never ever put you in that position or expose you to this.

As long as their lips are moving, they are lying. They (Narc) needs always to the attention of many partners to try and fill the deep dark pit in their soul

If you got away with your sanity and free of any STDs as I did..Run and don’t look back ever. May I remind you, don’t be jealous of the new supply or supplies, past the baton. It is the turn to enter the “crazy house” and be added to the list of the Narc appliances.

Celebrate your Freedom!! I am!!

.

]]> By: Anonymous https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-762198 Tue, 20 Dec 2016 21:34:05 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-762198 Hello.
I’ve been in my relationship for just over 6 years now. My N was everything I ever wanted, in the beginning. Although he was married, they just weren’t getting along anymore. I fell, and I fell hard. They divorced and she remarried. Years went by and as they did, he always had female “friends” that I didn’t trust or like but was reassured there was nothing to concern myself with. Always had it in my mind he was cheating. Eventually the verbal abuse started. I’m a cunt, I’m a stupid bitch, etc. Anytime I didn’t do exactly what he wanted he would verbally lash me and tell me to pack my shit and go. “If you don’t like it, you know where the door is.” Hindsight is 20/20… I wish I’d walked out each time. Always ended up begging to stay. Stupid. But I was not in my right mind; I was being manipulated. Last year he came clean about a lady he had sex with. While dropping that bomb on me he decided to rub a little salt in the wound and mention he had never stopped having sex with his ex wife. He said that she would text him everyday and ask to come by on her lunch to have sex. He “tried telling her no but she just persists” I know now it’s bullshit. She’s an enabler as she still allows his hooks to penetrate… amongst other things. He made me feel that it was my fault he cheated. I wasnt being nice to him. I wasnt helping him with his business enough. He didnt feel the love from me… all lies. He swears up and down he has not cheated on me since coming clean last year but recently I’ve seen his emails where he mentions that I’m busy with work and not around and they discuss times. I’ve been calling them his “sex appointments” as I discuss my exit plan and progress with my family and friends. I just recently learned about N and started researching it extensively. I have been cold and distant this week, not allowing him rule over me. He knows something is up but clearly doesn’t know how to handle it. He hasn’t addressed it. I must admit it’s a little fun and feels good to play the game from on top for once. Now I wait for another rage where he tells me to get out, and I will. I feel that I will do much better that way as we have 2 very young children together. I read blogs and posts everyday about N and it’s made me unimaginably stronger mentally and keeps me going. I am determined to hold my ground next time and leave with what tiny sliver of dignity I have left. For my daughters!!!

]]> By: Lunye https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-680540 Mon, 15 Aug 2016 15:26:30 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-680540 In reply to Elena.

This article was very helpful with dealing with my narcissistic abuse. It’s very painful mentally & all I could think of is I want my life back. The control & the manipulation is horrible. These ppl r evil & I really regret I met this man. Nevertheless, I will continue to pray will go ” NO CONTACT”. The game they play with your emotions is a no win situation with them. Rembr u will not win!!!!

]]> By: Fillyo4 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-659770 Sun, 10 Apr 2016 20:09:28 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-659770 I discovered this article while sitting in divorce court! It helped me have perspective that I was finally breaking free after 19 years of marriage hell!

]]> By: Anisha https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-656666 Wed, 24 Feb 2016 06:13:24 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-656666 In reply to Kitty.

Thanks fr the helpful write-up…m in a bad phase myself where I hv been left alone n he dnt evn mention the reasn..just SD its coz of sme hurtful things I SD I past..plz pray fr my recovery as I hv accepted this as gods will…thnks stay blessed all

]]> By: Denise Roget https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-649539 Wed, 16 Dec 2015 03:26:33 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-649539 Forgot to add: u tube blog will be entitled: Narcissim The Clearing Thanks, Denise Roget

]]> By: Denise Roget https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/how-to-leave-the-narcissist-with-your-emotions-intact/#comment-649536 Wed, 16 Dec 2015 03:22:44 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=960#comment-649536 I ‘woke up’ in a phone therapy session. I just had to do something this time! I found that my husband had been making homemade porn with myself as the unwitting mount ! He still defends that this is normal because we are married. “It’s just us, whats the prob? No! that was just YOU! I was out of the loop. After hearing 17 years worth of the odd and irritatic behavior in my home, the therapist politely suggested that I do a bit of research on N abuse. After doing so, I realized that YES The shoe fit like Cindy’s glass slipper. I think my dad may have been an N with my mom as the empath. She died 5 months ago, poured out in her service . I love that God has made me to be a caring woman but I was imagining that I was serving The Lord by supporting my husband whatever that might include on a given day. The scriptures seemingly teach that but for the cause of physical adultery, we should not separate. The word for adultery is more precisely interpreted DEFRAUDING. Look it up, Jesus girls. This is the first time I’ve blogged. I also made a video blog, my first, this morning, documenting my uncertain journey . I will upload on u tube on Dec. 15.15 Please watch and subscribe

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