This is so good! I remember for years I thought I must bring it out of him. My sister used to tell me I was annoying and frustrated her and I figured I must be doing that in my marriage. For years I decided to try and be perfect and I still managed to receive horrible verbal abuse.
I am so glad I am free of this. I now know nothing I have ever done should have received the treatment that was being given to me. I have even concluded that even if a person was doing something awful a living spouse would still never project the type of abuse that Narcs can! I have accepted my losses and am soooo incredibly proud that I have arrived at this level thanks to this whole community! I love you all!

Hi Nath,

I so agree with being truthful. People don’t need the nitty gritty … just the broad strokes without emotional content.

Great job for being real.

Mel 🙏💕❤️

In showing up authentically I am wondering: I started at a new workplace and when having the team meeting one of my new colleagues said: I know your name via your husband. She’s referring clients to him via an other workplace she’s also working. I responded: ” I’m divorced”. An other person asked who he is because we are both in the same field, same city.
I just said his name and we discussed the things that were planned.
The narc doesn’t want colleagues and clients to know we are divorced. To me it didn’t feel right to not tell that I’m divorced even if the narc is going to react not in a good way to this if he knows.
Is this being authentic? It also feels like it’s a stronger position to be honest instead of trying to hide information?

Thank you!

Hi Jane M,

yes “intuit” is to feel.

The mind is where the ego works. And the mind can be “limited” or “expanded”.

Jane have you had the most incredible thoughts of wisdom that you just know are coming from something much “higher” than yourself?

And you also know that you have had thoughts (like we all have) that are coming from a fearful, young undeveloped wounded part. Thoughts that can be petty, defensive, or even self-serving.

The link in the article to “The Difference Between The Inner Child and The Ego” describes the ego in detail.

It’s a longer conversation that what I can pop in a post reply!

I hope this helps.

Mel xo

Hi Kath,

how true is that passage in Mama Mia!

Wow – spot on!

Just wanting to say this to you – it’s really important that we don’t use “other things”, even healthy things, to simply “distract” us from the core wounds.

Because if we are to do that, then the pattern and compulsion still exists and the cycle just keeps going, and it will represent.

It is about healing those core wounds, and then lovely aspects of life are done as a natural outpour of “self” and not a tactic of inner self avoidance.

There is a subtle but massive difference.

In regard to the muscle testing – every QFh I create (Modules), work I do on others and on self – I use a kinesiology style muscle test. On all aspects of the healing. With clients only for my part in it – (I ask them to feel, connect to emotions and intuit) and for myself I feel, connect and intuit, as well as ratings, load up and checking if cleared.

Self-healing is a little bit of a different process than working with others! Explaining it fully could be a little complicated!!

Big hug back Kath! 🙂

Mel xo