Hi Ruth,

its really essential to work with NARP first, because its the abuse inner programs which need to be addressed first..

I hope this helps..

Mel xo

Thank you Tiffany!
I hope this helps – Once you feel free from guilt of others, and free of fixing what the Narc has done or taking responsibility for him and then your soul is still nudging you to take him to court – by then you will have a clear and focused attitude to do it.
Best of luck to you
Annie

I am soooooooooooo extremely happy for you Laura. You go girl!!!! What wonderful life you are making for yourself.
I a seriously excited for you!
All the best
Annie
xxxx

Dear Annie,

I did look back in on this text string and was very intrigued by your two brother’s actions and how your life mirrored your new, calm center. Wow! That gives me such inspiration and hope! I am really starting to see how–if I stay calm and in my spiritual center–it really doesn’t matter if my family “gets” me or supports me. More and more I am able to let my dysfunctional (and beloved of course) family interpret me and my truth as they wish. I am feeling within myself the reward for my inner work and it is becoming enough to counter whatever my family members choose.

An interesting addition to my dad’s heart attack story. I had called my N. sister and she, unexpectedly, handed the phone to my father. He was so in his narc element of having all the four sisters call him, tend him, attend to him that I began to feel physically sick. It was so obvious to me how he was being vampirically fed. Suddenly, I started choking! I had to get off the phone. Immediately I realized what my body was choking on–my truth (throat chakra). And my truth was that I did not want to be one of the devoted daughters to this toxic man. My inner shift happened right away: I don’t have to do this. I am just trying to look good and that is all about ego. Let go of looking good and serve the soul.

Thank you so much for your story, Annie. I can’t tell you how much it has meant to me that you shared so openly and exactly. Bless you for your courage.

Hi Tiffany,

you are very welcome!

I agree with you that misogyny, devaluing and de-humanising are all trademarks of narcissism, and this is often ‘sexual’…and it does not have to be physical – it is emotional as well..

Tiffany when you work on your Inner Being, you will ‘come home’ you will love you – guaranteed.

Mel xo

Hi Ruth,

I hear when you are saying re integration, and not doing ‘all or nothing’ splitting..

My take is ‘good or bad’ is egoic (normally human) and a defence mechanism as well as a control mechanism we can all have..

The real deal is that there is still a wound underneath it all that we are trying to manage…ad when the wound is released we don’t need to ‘manage’ we can ‘flow’.

To me true integration is evolving our shadows, bringing them into the light…because then not only do we ‘integrate’ (come home) we also mine the energy that was trapped in the shadow…that is when we start expanding into new heights and ‘space’ and beingness that was not previously available – and it is much more than ‘integration’…it is ascension..

In regard to not being sure on ‘what to do’ if you were to claim and release all the painful energy around ‘that’ confusion, what would be released (mined from within it)would be the truth on it for you…

I agree anger can be in repeat…the real truth is – anger is a guard, a defence against hurt – it is ‘hurt expressed’…When we reach down under the anger find and up-level the hurt wound (young / vulnerable unhealed part) then the anger is gone, and an emotional pattern is transformed…

The truth is it was these young hurt wounds inside us that were in the shadows (unrecognised) that had to project themselves out into The Field to get our attention – they had to deliver a ‘hurter’ to us..

Then we get angry – but the truth is we need to go inwards to the hurt wound and release and evolve it…

Then we are not ‘managing’ we are ‘ascending’ and becoming more and more conscious (transcending unconsciousness which is the ‘bringer’ of all pain) that we in fact the generator of our experience..and we have the absolute freedom and power to create our life from the inside out.

You are doing great – but there is a more direct process…

Hope this makes sense…

Mel xo

My brother molested me and he is a man who loves his children to the best of his ability. Because he has not taken responsibility I do not have a relationship with him (boundary), but I release myself from the burden of carrying the torch of pain, the evidence of his wrong doing, that only in the end, hurts me. In this way I forgive him and I wish him well.

Thank you for including this topic in your blog. As sexual abuse is hard to talk about, it often goes overlooked in our society and on the internet. Many sites discourage participants from sharing details about how they were sexually abused.

Frankly, I believe sexual abuse is a common tool in any abuser’s toolbox. They use it to create shame, disgust and self-hate in order to weaken us even more… Taking our power from us as they twist the truth making us believe it was our fault or that it ‘didn’t really happen’.

Fortunately, we can take our power back by releasing false belief systems and realizing that it was never about us. It was about THEM.

When we no longer take on other people’s stuff, we are finally free to heal ourselves and elevate to the next level. When we stop blaming others for the condition of our lives, we are finally free to create an amazing life for ourselves.

Your blog is a blessing, as are you!

Annie,

I applaud your courage in coming forth and sharing your story… And your courage for going to the police despite the vicious retribution you knew you would face. Iam still struggling with going to court over something my ex did. O I do not want him to hurt anyone else, but he has finally exited my life. I want to focus and heal me. However, I am having a hard time loving myself for not holding him accountable for his actions.