Comments on: Married To A Narcissist – My Top 10 Lessons Learned https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/ Devastated by a narcissist? Melanie's Narcissism blog offers support & empowering tools to heal & thrive after narcissistic abuse, gain a new life & fulfilling relationships. Thu, 17 Sep 2020 08:44:27 +0000 hourly 1 By: Becky https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-959317 Sun, 26 Nov 2017 09:57:58 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-959317 In reply to Joni.

I have the same problem. I’m finding it so hard to forgive myself for the abuse that my children suffered. I have suffered the narcissistic abuse for over 36 years. We are divorcing now, after finding out he was gay and having affairs all along. I can’t get over all the lies and all the years of my life that were wasted loving someone who never loved me and was never honest with me. But the abuse of my children is the hardest, they have and continue to suffer in their own ways. All I ever wanted to be was a good mom and I have failed. With no chance to fix it.

]]> By: Julie https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-909062 Wed, 09 Aug 2017 09:19:24 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-909062 I don’t understand how I am still addicted bc now that I see him for who he is, I’m scared to death of him and want to get as far from him as I can. Hkewever, with shared parenting, I cannot get away.

Julie

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-908951 Wed, 09 Aug 2017 02:07:15 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-908951 In reply to Cheryl Marecki.

Hi Cheryl,

it’s my pleasure 🙂

I totally agree that balance in your life is so important. It sounds like in your present life situation, the isolation is “hurting” because your soul is screaming, “No that’s not quite it”.

My suggestion would be to listen to this …and make a change if you can.

Also in regard to your Module work I would love you to come into the NARP Forum to get support and coaching help with your NARP work … because you totally do not need to do this alone.

That, in itself, is an incredible connection with others.

I hope this helps.

Mel xo

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-908948 Wed, 09 Aug 2017 01:59:36 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-908948 In reply to Maryam.

Hi Maryam,

I love your suggestion 🙂

I will pop this on my list.

Wishing you wonderful healing!

Mel xo

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-908943 Wed, 09 Aug 2017 01:51:23 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-908943 In reply to Christine.

Hi Christine,

please know not all is lost, and what is so important is that you do heal all over again and purge this trauma too.

It may just make peace for the entire situation to shift.

Oftentimes the deep inner healing of us does generate that energetic shift.

Sending you hugs and wishing you blessings and breakthrough.

Mel xo

]]> By: Melanie Tonia Evans https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-908940 Wed, 09 Aug 2017 01:46:54 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-908940 In reply to Satina Cooper.

Hi Satina,

I am so glad you are enjoying the forum!

Mel xo

]]> By: Satina Cooper https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-908904 Wed, 09 Aug 2017 00:02:07 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-908904 In reply to Lady Jedi.

Hi LJ
WOW thanks for sharing. A light bulb went off while reading your feedback. I’m going to look into my situation fir I just know the same thing was what I was up too as well. Can feel the ah ha before i even look for it. These forums are such gems. Thanks again hugs Satina

]]> By: Christine https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-908873 Tue, 08 Aug 2017 22:03:52 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-908873 I have been on this program for many years now, and have succeeded in leaving that life of abuse behind me, except for my eldest daughter taking over where he left of . She is full of resentment that I left her poor Father and has chosen to be a fully fledged member of his new family. His partner being one of my friends , her children having been life long friends of my children. It appears to me that she wants to punish me and she keeps me distanced from the grandchildren . I feel like an outsider trying so hard to get to see my grandchildren when she makes such feeble excuses as to why she’s too busy for me. My youngest daughter has been affected by this so much and I understand that she feels torn between her loyalty to her Sister and Father that she is also becoming rude and hard hearted .. So the effects of not leaving earlier are wide reaching and devastating. Even now they question if Dad made you so unhappy why didn’t you leave. I honestly feel thst enough heartache has been suffered and I do not want my Grandchildren to be brought up with this animosity, I feel that all ICAN do is leave them all alone to live their life in the negative environment this N spreads as I cannot fight it anymore. My heart is breaking at the breakdown of the relationship with my daughters and find myself back in the place of needing to heal all over again. This time I don’t know that I ever will, so continue to put that one foot in front of the other and accept it’s my cross to bear for my role in participating in a life with a Narc.

]]> By: Maryam https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/10-lessons-learned-from-being-married-to-a-narcissist/#comment-908679 Tue, 08 Aug 2017 08:21:35 +0000 https://blog.melanietoniaevans.com/?p=5089#comment-908679 Dear Melanie,

Could you please write an article on Emotional Blackmail (e.g narcissist threatening you to use the information you confided in them against you, revealing your secrets, etc.) and the ways to deal with it?

Many thanks,
Maryam

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