Comments on: 6 Signs You May Be A Target For Narcissists

By: Melanie Tonia Evans

Melanie Tonia Evans — Mon, 06 Dec 2021 00:36:03 +0000

Hi Alex,

I am so happy that this deeply resonated and that you have set yourself free!

Mel 🙏💞🦋

By: Alex Davies

Alex Davies — Sun, 05 Dec 2021 19:53:38 +0000

Wow! Melanie – this one really hit home: “Our relationships are not formed by “treating others how we wish to be treated ourselves”, they are created from treating ourselves with love, value and respect and speaking up, saying “NO” and not staying attached to people who don’t have our best interests at heart.” OMG! How many times have I sat listening to a narc friend who talked forever and never gave me room to speak? Who then shouted at me when I offered my own opinion? Or walked out of the room. And I kept thinking: “Any minute now (or any day soon) they will see how respectful I am of their opinions, and how I listen to them. And they will suddenly do the same for me.” I can’t tell you how many years I was hoping/expecting that to happen. All to no avail. In fact the narc just got worse and worse and worse. I did, eventually, work out for myself that nothing was going to change, and it only took 18 years (LOL) but I got there in the end. Of course, if I had known/understood about narc behaviour from day one, I would have been out of there within the first month. But, Never Too Late, – as the saying goes. Thank you Melanie for confirming for me my correct decision. and for alerting others to the truth asap (so you don’t waste 18 years of your life, thinking: any minute now, they will change their ways. They will see how I listen to them, and then they will respectfully listen to me.) Negative – that doesn’t happen with a narcissist.

By: Melanie Tonia Evans

Melanie Tonia Evans — Tue, 30 Nov 2021 22:16:15 +0000

In reply to Iris.

Iris,

thank you honey.

I’ll update you real soon!

Love and power to all of us!

Mel 🙏💞🦋

By: Melanie Tonia Evans

Melanie Tonia Evans — Tue, 30 Nov 2021 22:15:12 +0000

In reply to Hagen.

It is my pleasure Hagen,

Many continued blessings to you

Mel 🙏💞🦋

By: Melanie Tonia Evans

Melanie Tonia Evans — Tue, 30 Nov 2021 22:14:35 +0000

In reply to Jo.

Hi Jo,

I am so pleased that this is helpful!

Much Love to you

Mel 🙏💞🦋

By: Melanie Tonia Evans

Melanie Tonia Evans — Tue, 30 Nov 2021 22:14:03 +0000

In reply to Deppy.

Hi Deppy,

yes we are trying to get it up again – working on it!

Mel 🙏💞🦋

By: Iris

Iris — Tue, 30 Nov 2021 11:24:53 +0000

HI Melanie,

Thank God that you continue to write these reminders for us, and do not give up. There is so much Narcissistic Abuse going on globally, we are having to apply these principles and Personal Protective Practices more attentively and widely. I keep discovering boundaries that I have to articulate to myself because they are constantly challenged. I am getting more at peace realizing this process of Self-identification (by finding my boundaries) IS itself the process of living. So rather than feeling ‘traumatized’ or ‘victimized’ I understand I am evolving. THANK YOU for the work you do to support everyone’s Self-Discovery and affirmation.

Lots of love, dear Melanie – and I hope everything is working out for you right now.

By: Hagen

Hagen — Mon, 29 Nov 2021 22:30:57 +0000

Hi Melanie ,this sentence sums it up for me,
“Can you now see how self-partnering, turning within and doing the inner work to heal the relationship with yourself is the most important relationship work you will ever do?” Yes !
Learning that lesson has been my path for almost 5 years . I get it , and I look forward to a better life through self acceptance , and the knowledge that heals me.
Thank you so much for sharing the truths that free our souls from our subconscious selves , pennies from heaven.
Kind regards Hagen

By: Man from California

Man from California — Mon, 29 Nov 2021 19:38:05 +0000

Rachel: I do feel your pain (and even confusion), especially as I smack-my-forehead how many times I have repeatedly attracted narcs into my life. I didn’t realize, I didn’t understand who (or WHAT) they are, I wasn’t aware of the deeper (really, REALLY deep) multi-generational aspects to this sort of behavior in my family tree (past and present), I didn’t know so much. There was an “a ha moment” after I was discarded by my two-decade-long domestic partner, what might be called the beginning of my realization(s) and recovery: I found a text message on an old phone of ex-narc’s where she called herself “Ms. Narcissist” (meaning she KNOWS what she is). This brought back a flood of recall from my undergraduate days at university where I took a Psychology course that mentioned “narcissistic personality disorder” and the puzzle pieces started to fall into place.

What I wish for you is that your “what the hell?!” (and I’ve had MANY of those moments with these monsters!) turns into “wow, now I know.” I mean this in the kindest way, as I’ve inadvertently done narc relationships a number of times (without realizing it, until my LAST hard, hard discard), but we do repeat lessons until they “stick.” It sounds like you are so fed up with this, that you’ve “had it” enough to say “enough is enough.” That’s GREAT! For me, this was a crucial keystone to my healing and recovery. May it be the same for you, too.

There are excellent tools (here and with Melanie’s amazing plethora of resources) to continue this journey. It’s great to see how many of us here get up, dust ourselves off, and get on with a life that thrives. I don’t mean to diminish the pain and loss that happens as we find ourselves here, that’s quite real. But it DOES feed the fire, the burning desire, to become “our whole selves.” I wish you the very best on your quest.