Thank you Faye!

Bless you 🙂

Mel 🙏💕💚

I think I may have done the wrong thing with my mom when I gave my parents a thank you card for allowing me to stay there without having to pay rent… Yes, it WAS threatened a couple times when my mom (the narc) and I got into it with verbal fighting. I took the blame for things getting bad… Saying in the card “I’m sorry I was such a pain, especially to mom) … I guess I was appeasing her with that .. which my mom truly WAS to blame. But that was when I was about to move to a new city and I didn’t want to bring out a huuuuge can worms during that last dinner I was there. My mom had already told me in a sarcastic way “I hope you appreciate us allowing u to live here.”. Yes, I AM family and that was just totally out of line. I had already done that card earlier that day, so when she said that I said
“Wow, u really think that, mom!” So I went and got that card right then and there to SHOW her that yes I WAS appreciative, and even DID that card before she even said that!!! Yes, SO dysfunctional… And yes I know they are dysfunctional beings.

I am now moved Away to a new city more than. An Hr away. Just me and my cat in a spacious studio apt while I am working at Amazon nearby and maybe somewhere else in the near future. I am SO thankful I am out of there. & I moved out without ANY of their help, even tho my mom DID try with trying to get brother to help me again when he came to visit. I had to keep reassuring her that I had it all taken care of and I didn’t need their help. & She she sarcastically said back to me and my dad that “you have and she has it alllll taken care of!!!!” Thanks to me saving $ and the Two Men and A Truck company!!! I am ready to thrive and heal in this new environment!!!!

BIG thanks, also to you Mel, and other narc info teachers and spiritual teachers out there!!! 💜🙏💜

Karen, have you considered going to groups, like local Bible groups, or group counseling sessions? Even if it’s AA a lot of times even if you’re not an alcoholic they talk a lot about toxic people and how to deal with them, and you can meet some really nice loving people there.

Karen, you need to stop being so hard on yourself. I think so many years of abuse have left you in a state where you are constantly allowing that little terrorist in your head, that your lifelong “partner” turned even more evil against you, by reinforcing the negativity and making it exponentially get worse over the years, well you need to STOP LISTENING TO THAT EGO TERRORIST IN YOUR MIND telling you that you’re not good enough, that you don’t deserve to be happy, that your life is over, that you’re too old to find happiness, that it’s too late or that this is it for you. BECAUSE IT’S NOT. IT’S NEVER TOO LATE.

Karen, people who are 60 still go to college. I went to community college at 25 years old, and I felt so bad, that students would point and laugh at me, and then I noticed that at least 30% of the students were all older than me! And now, I don’t feel bad taking classes at college at any age! I am 29 by the way now.

But Karen, please, please please please don’t be alone, don’t hide from people. We aren’t meant to be alone. Go to some meetings, go join some groups, and at first, just sit in and listen, you don’t have to share if you don’t want to, but within a few weeks you will have all kinds of friends who will love you for who you are! I can promise you that. You deserve love, friendship and happiness. Don’t you give up! And hey, feel free to email me any time. I am from the Northwest and I know what it’s like dealing with emotional abuse. Many times, it seems, dealing with the pain and recovery of extensive emotional abuse can be tougher than dealing with recovering from physical abuse, because emotional abuse seems to have so many more layers to it. And I am not trying to take anything away from people who have been physically abused, I know it has its own challenges. But emotional abuse is no joke. Emotional abuse has the power to kill, literally.

Karen, I really hope you are doing OK. But I want you to be doing well. You deserve to be doing well. I wish I could give you a big hug ma’am. I never respond to these, but your message touched my heart. Because I also know what it’s like to be and feel alone. But I’m making changes now and things are looking up, and so can you! Karen, don’t you stay discouraged! Don’t you even dare stay discouraged! Don’t shut yourself in. Everything can and WILL get better. Just reach out. Reach out, and the right people will show up. I promise. Just reach out.

You are never alone!!

Hang in there Trish and have self confidence and do the internal work of recognizing and letting go of not only what was done to you but what you may have done in return. Don’t use it as an excuse but as a means of personal growth. Be a better you! You will come out on top and they will always be the same. God will bless those who let go of the Jezebel Spirit who is infecting their life. Have Faith and be Strong!

Melanie Rocks!

You are an amazing woman and very wise! Each day gets better and better. Just as we slowly “lost” ourselves into the relationship, once free we slowly re-gain and re-energize ourselves by removing the malignant spirit from our lives. xoxoxoxoxoxo Have a great day!!