My mother is also a covert narcissist, she is cruel, judgmental, and sneaky! And the gaslighting, always telling me I must have dreamed things that I know happened! I am stuck living in my mother’s house now while I’m going through cancer treatment and I would almost rather be living in my car! I can’t wait for the day when I can tell her goodbye for the last time!

Hi Shane,

yes most definitely you can lead the way and help your son.

Please google my name plus “helping our children” and there are many resources which I hope can help you in detail.

Mel 🙏💞🦋

A big question and my only concern now.
Is it possible to stop this cycle of abuse for my son. He’s now (10yo) he lives week on week off between his mothers house and my house. I feel he is moving forward in leaps and bounds. He was withheld from me for a long time after separation, also convinced of many things about me that aren’t true. He now trusts me again which I achieved by making sure he was strong enough to trusts himself. He notices her behaviours that aren’t right and expresses them to me. He points out the things that she said I was doing to her then explains she was doing those things to me, these things he only knows cause he was with her while she done these things. I never tell him the things that his mother has done to me as I feel that would be me controlling his emotions.
If there is any websites or sources you can think of to point me to that will help me guide him the right way, it would be muchly appreciated.

Thank you for your work in helping people heal.

I had the realisation a few weeks ago that my mother is a covert narcissist and both myself and my sister had years of emotional abuse which we really struggled to deal with. Everything makes so much sense to me now. I developed chronic OCD anxiety when I was about 13/14 years old and I realise now that was my protective/survival system kicking in to keep me safe in my home environment. I did feel so defective and worthless growing up and I started journaling my thoughts to try to make sense of it all and to remind myself that it did actually happen and I wasn’t imagining it and going crazy! The instances of abuse that I have been recollecting has been profound. Since I went NC, things in my life have just started to ‘flow’ more easily. I don’t feel so wound up, anxious and down and I am feeling like I am unravelling the pieces of the puzzle and becoming more aligned to my true self. Your videos and posts have helped me IMMENSELY over the years and the work you do for this community is amazing! Thank you so much 🥰🙏

Dear Laura – this is quite an amazing synchronicity to come across your words. chills actually on my body as I write. I am doing Mel’s thriver course and going deep into the pain of my narcissistic mother and a team member of the programme shared this link with me and yours is the first comment I am coming across and word for word it speaks to my experience. I especially love: “I sure as hell do not want to reincarnate with her again! Um, no thanks!” Thank you for voicing your experience so eloquently and your gratitude to Mel so beautifully, it inspires me to commit more deeply to the QFH as a tool, and I so appreciate the way you speak of your soul choosing Mel as a teacher and healer. Anyway, from a fellow Laura: thank you for giving me the inspiration and soul support to face the truth that I would rather loose it all to gain it al then to continue being the scape goat for my mother’s life and to be at the behest of her constant games. Laura x