Comments on: Is My Adult Child A Narcissist? When Helping Them Is Hurting You

By: Traci

Traci — Sun, 16 Nov 2025 20:53:44 +0000

If my mission is my healthiness, then I inspire all of life in the healthiest of ways. 🙏❤️‍🩹

By: ian mcloughlin

ian mcloughlin — Sun, 20 Nov 2022 01:11:38 +0000

its Really good to come across and read personal stories about what its like to have an adult narcissistic child. My Daughter was raised by her Narcissistic mother and at the time I did not understand who i was co parenting with. It was like hell on earth and finally when i started to read about Narcissism i was able to start arming myself with the correct tools….until my daughter reached 15 or 16 (i cant remember). That changed my life in ways i never thought, coming to terms with my daughters strange behaviours towards me that at the time i took for granted as part of her personality that she was quirky and childish. She was raised by a Narcissist and i felt guilty that if i would have raised her then maybe she would have had somewhat a normal personality and not end up becoming Narcissistic. Her treatment of me was toxic and cruel and it was hard for me to accept that she was this way, she was my daughter and i wanted to protect her as any parent would. It didnt matter though because my loyalty to her wellbeing was challenged to the point of almost breaking me and some who knew me said that after that she changed something in me. Her mother took her to florida when she was 17 and i have not seen her since, though ive heard enough abuse from her through texts and phone calls over the last 4 years to try and keep me down and out, but she does not win as often as she would like to. Make no mistake its changed my life in ways that i wish things were different, like not getting to see her graduate because she thought i didnt deserve a ticket(no reason ever given) I flew 1000 miles to where she lived just to watch her graduate on line and atleast she cant say that i was not there. She never cared that i was there and still doesnt now even though she is 20 now. I will Never get to enjoy my daughter in my life like other parents and birthdays and Christmas are not the best as it hurts. Its affected my relationship with my Girlfriend and we struggle sometimes.i struggle with her daughter because she lacks emotion and i get alarm bells and become stand offish with her cause im worred that history will repeat itself. I have read some amazing books over the years from HG Tudor and Sam Vaknin but i do have my low and dark times when i hear from my daughter is some abusive way. I am hoping to get some insights and support from other parents who have gone through this and still deal with it.

By: Melanie Tonia Evans

Melanie Tonia Evans — Thu, 15 Jul 2021 23:58:10 +0000

In reply to Sarah.collinsrae@gmail.com.

Hi Sarah,

I am so pleased I can help you with this grief.

So much love to you and yours and thank you for your kind words lovely lady.

Mel 🙏💞🦋

By: Sarah.collinsrae@gmail.com

Sarah.collinsrae@gmail.com — Tue, 13 Jul 2021 07:30:05 +0000

Hi. I have been following your blogs very quietly. My story around my son ended in no contact so this also means I do not see my grandchildren. Partly my choice due to seeing them struggle and witnessing the abuse from my son toward me and partly due to my son punishing me by refusing to let me see them. It has been nearly 3 yrs now. I do not know where they live nor have any contact details. It breaks me to know my grandchildren will be brought up by my son and the trauma they will continue to live. I am finding each day a little easier as I move forward and I value all the positive things and people in my life. I could not have done this without your support. I am and will continue to quietly follow you. Please don’t underestimate the powerful impact you have on those who quietly continue to be part of this community. My faithful gratitude always. Sarah

By: Sonya

Sonya — Sun, 03 May 2020 17:33:08 +0000

I have been going through this with my now 26 year old daughter, for what seems like a lifetime. She was raised by her daddy, since was 5, and he is a narcissist. She says she has so much anger towards me, for not spending time with her, when she was a child. That I didn’t cook every single meal. Just anything you can think of. She has unfriended me on Facebook, she talks to me, but I always feel less than her. If I say something, or call her out, she alienates me, won’t let me see my 3 grandsons. I have another daughter, that I didn’t have any problems with until, her dad and I got divorced. Then hell opened up, and she shifted. We were divorced when she was 11. Her stepmother, was some kind of instigator, she caused much of our division I’m sure. My daughter got married last year, and didn’t invite me to the wedding. She got pregnant, and I was the last person she told. She had a baby shower, didn’t invite me. They say everything is my fault. I was not a bad mom.. I didn’t drink, do drugs, smoke, waste money and not pay house payments. I didn’t beat them. I didn’t lay up with different men in front of them. I took them to church. I’m so confused!

By: Melanie Tonia Evans

Melanie Tonia Evans — Tue, 05 Nov 2019 08:11:26 +0000

In reply to Johanna Garvey Rubin.

That is so beautiful Johanna,

Power to you

Mel 🙏💕💛

By: Johanna Garvey Rubin

Johanna Garvey Rubin — Mon, 04 Nov 2019 13:58:51 +0000

‘If my mission is my healthiness, then I inspire all of life in the healthiest of ways.’ While letting go of the guilt I feel about my adult child’s narcissism – perhaps understaing why – wanting to have a magic external “fix” just feeds my own codependent addiction.
I must accept – It just is. Entrust it to my Higher Power – And now in this moment I will continue the inner work of healing. Thank you!

By: brenda firebaugh

brenda firebaugh — Tue, 08 Oct 2019 00:33:09 +0000

In reply to Melanie Tonia Evans. I know sometimes they don't come around even with boundaries. I have 2Nadult children like this and it has been very painful. They are so selfish. They wanted us to keep the grandchildren when they were little but now that we are no use to them (grandchildren are older) they never come around, they are busy and don't have time. They get sick and don't come Xmas after I have cooked and make plans other times and don't show up. When we did make plans Xmas we would have to get together a week before, never Xmas Eve or Xmas because they had to be with other people, we got crumbs. Last year it was peaceful and we went out of town. Plan to do the same this year.

By: brenda firebaugh

brenda firebaugh — Mon, 07 Oct 2019 22:56:44 +0000

I have set boundaries and sometimes nothing works with Nchildren. I have 2Nchildren. They come up with every excuse in the book. Never have Xmas Eve or Xmas with us, they say they want to come week earlier, then they don’t show half the time after I have cooked. THe holiday last year we left t own and it was very peaceful. Glad your son came around but sometimes they don’t and you have to find your joy elsewhere.