Hi Miguel,

I am so happy for you and your daughter that you are seeing as you shift, so does she.

Absolutely I’d love you to share this information on your blog. More parents do need to know how we can heal our children, by healing ourselves.

I love that I could help you help her. Our children are precious.

Much love to you both

Mel 🙏💞🦋

My 22 year old daughter is very important to me.

After a disastrous divorce I was always worried about what would happen to my daughter, how to help her and I felt so desperate, so incompetent, so powerless.

I finally heard you speak in a video of a narcissism aid program, about what to do with your children and that caught my attention.
Enter the NARP program, then the love, health and abundance program and then the next one.
I have improved a lot and I continue to do so and it is true, my daughter, although she does not live with me, I see her better and I am hopeful that the situation will continue to improve.

In another known therapeutic method where I participated, they did not offer me that help with my daughter.

I have a blog and I am going to write an article about this, quoting you, you have permission.

With tears in my eyes I appreciate your help because my daughter is very important to me.

Miguel

Hi Sean,

sending you and your son so much love and continued healing.

Thank you for your thoughtful share

Mel 🙏💕💚

Hi Melanie,
I want to warn people of a potential repercussion of a narcissist’s control of their children and of the other parent’s actions combating the narc.
My son’s wellbeing is giving me the strength to delve into myself and that has been a shattering experience. But worth it because I wouldn’t be able to help my son if I hadn’t gone there.
He has a condition called Amplified Musculoskeletal Pain Syndrome. So bad that he was in a wheelchair.
It comes from psychological trauma, a result of the suppression of developing, nurturing and allowing a child’s True Self to be present.
As much as I thought I was giving a positive guidance on routine and structure to counteract the complete lack of those from his mother, I was prescribing and lecturing and responding badly to his mother. I wasn’t being the role model I thought I was. This has probably contributed to his condition and I must accept responsibility for this, for my also suppressing his True Self.
So to help our kids, we must ‘put the oxygen mask on first’.
If you are searching for a switch you can flick that will change your situation, you will be searching forever.
The answer is only within ourselves, only we can switch on the light.
And only then, we will be the guiding light for our kids to follow and help protect them from the insidious everlasting destruction methods of the narcissist.

Thankyou again Melanie, I am sorry for all of your pain, but grateful that( amazed actually) you are able to help others because of it.
Sean

Hi Sean,

I am so pleased that you have clarity and strength – and that I could help.

Mel 🙏💕💚

PS.
I forgot to mention that I have been reading a vast amount relating to this topic over the last couple of months.
Starting off with hearing other people’s experiences. It was such a relief to understand that I was not alone and I was not crazy. Well not that much anyway, but validation of my experience was a relief in itself.
Then to understand these narcissistic traits and how/why they are there.
Then to the treatments that are available.
It was your writings Melanie, that I ended up with that have consolidated all the information I have been reading and helped me come to my revelation. It was your writings that gave me the Aha moment.
Thankyou for them.
Sean

I knew I had fear. But I hadn’t broken down that fear to find out exactly what it was- what was I fearful of, when did I feel it, what could be done to not have it.
Now I have, most revealingly, found out that because it was within me, I own it and only I have control of it.
Aha!
I am fearful of how I feel after interacting with her.
What part of the interaction causes those feelings? Her responses to my attempts to have a rational conversation.(including all of the tactics these people employ)
Therefore I am asking for my own fear!
I am interacting with a False Self, she can’t change. She feeds off my fear.
The only way to have no fear is to realise this and stop those futile attempts of mine.
I just tested my new awareness of this with a typical interaction with her.
Haha…. now I can laugh.
I know one interaction doesn’t mean everything is fine now. I have to cleanse my bloodstream of that poisonous black ink – but I feel I am on the right track. And that’s a great feeling.
I wish you all the best on your own journeys.
Sean