Hi Julie, I have lived it. Hang in there!! One way of approaching your kids is by adopting the mantra that they have room in their hearts for all of you. I said this over and over to mine. It was the only way that I could think of to not be turned into the enemy. Don’t make them choose. It’s going to take time. A long time but you are their mother and their hearts will choose ♥YOU over all. Peace sister. 🙏AMEN

Hi Julie,

my heart goes out to you, and please know that what you are going through is so normal and absolutely excruciating,

1) the quick replacement and 2) the obsessive, painful thoughts and feelings that you are suffering.

The complete and utter solution is NARP http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp

You have already come so far, and now it is the serious, dedicated inner work that will release these terrible thoughts / feelings from you and free you into the next part of your graduation/journey/life – the one you are here to live for you and your children.

NARP is the answer Julie. Once you start healing with it you will totally understand why.

Also, you don’t have to get through this alone – the NARP community is incredibly supportive, solution and growth based.

Mel 🙏💞🦋

Oh Man from California,

thank you for your lovely words!

Bless your growth Dear Man!

Mel 🙏💞🦋

Hi Maureen,

all dis-ease I believe is trauma or toxin based. So yes absolutely N-abuse creates illness.

The wonderful thing is that by releasing trauma we can re-set back to organic wellbeing.

You are very welcome and much love and healing to you

Mel 🙏💞🦋

In December I officially ended my 24 year marriage to my narcissist. It wasn’t until I found your resources that I even understood what had happened to my life.

I have been through hell and back one thousand times over. I definitely understand that your method of healing truly works.

I am at that phase where I am on my own island. There isn’t much here yet, just me and my teen and young adult children and we are hopeful that there is going to be soooo much fruitful life here, but it’s not here yet.

I feel like life came to a screeching hault. I have started obsessing again and turning outward because my ex-husband has been in a relationship with a girl practically since the day I said I wanted a divorce. From the outside it seems to be working with her. My kids have even been saying maybe dad is healing.

She is in the profession I always wanted to attain. I even tried to go back to school when the kids were little to attain this profession but found that myself and the kids were getting abused because of it, so I let my dreams of becoming a nurse become a loss.

Another thing going on is I always wanted to travel. I thought we should be making memories with our precious children but he was never interested.

Now, he has found a nurse. She apparently has tons of money, and 4 months into their relationship they are already heading to a tropical vacation.

It makes me feel beyond hurt because I feel he was a nothing for me and I lost so many years with my kids to make memories.

I’m afraid now because I am a shell of who I used to be, with very little resources. I’m afraid that my ex-husband and his new girlfriend are going to start having the life with my kids I always dreamed of. I feel so beyond scared of this.

I understand I don’t want that relationship any longer but I am stuck on obsessing over this. It hurts so bad. I also feel so depleted that maybe this girl will win my kids over because she hasn’t been diminished like I have been.

I am fighting with the thoughts that I feel like I was stronger in the end of our marriage when I lived with the narc and started to not feed into his narcisstic ways, I really had felt healthy and my kids saw that. I wasn’t relying on him to be my savior. But this, this is beyond hard. Like how you said you were lying on your bathroom floor and all those other horrible feelings…yep, that was me when I found out all this news.

I need to move forward. I need to make my life for my kids and myself. I don’t want to lose them to their narc of a dad and his new girlfriend.

Any helpful advice would be much appreciated!

💕🙏

Hello Maureen,
I’m sure the constant high levels of stress caused by my Narc Abuse gave me immune system disorders and yes, pre-diabetes. The only thing that gave me joy was exercise, probably due to stress relief and endorphins . Still, my health was getting worse year after year, non coincidently as was my relationship. After ending things with her almost 2 years ago and going no-contact, my health has improved significantly. I’ve lost weight, lowered my blood pressure and blood sugar, and have much more energy. Best of all, no more living with stress and the constant adrenaline surges. I didn’t realize how bad it was until a few months after I’d left town and she tried to contact me. My adrenaline surged and my stress went through the roof. It shocked me as I suddenly realized that this level of stress was what I lived with every day for the last few years of our relationship. I now know what kind of damage this does to the body.