Comments on: Why Do Narcissists Go After Lightworkers

By: Michelle

Michelle — Sun, 05 Aug 2018 04:56:33 +0000

Thank you.

By: Michael Christian

Michael Christian — Mon, 01 Jan 2018 13:14:29 +0000

Hi all.
I am sitting at the kitchen table watching these videos. As someone coming to terms with being a narcissist this video has helped me a lot. The mother of my child is a light worker, and a mist beautiful soul. One that I am just realising after 4 years of unconciousness that I have hurt so so deeply. She has undergone the rise in consciousness you describe in the video also. I am not sute if there is anything I can do to ‘fix’ myself or turn this into something positive but I’d love to know if any reading material or videos anyone can recommend?

By: Hélène

Hélène — Sat, 13 May 2017 11:49:26 +0000

This rly goes along well with your system–it can affect us bodily for sure & lean INto it, not away from it.

http://kellybroganmd.com/what-is-your-greatest-cancer-risk/utm_source=Kelly+Brogan+MD+Newsletter&utm_campaign=02775abd5fWhat+Is+Your+Greatest+Cancer+Risk%3F&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_d0f977a8c5-02775abd5f-111093453

By: J Woods

J Woods — Sun, 19 Feb 2017 19:27:12 +0000

Thank you for putting this msg out into the world. You’ve confirmed something I’ve been hearing inside for awhile: mainly that all this happened so I might finally acknowledge my own self and be free of the broken parts keeping me from truly joining the light I’ve sought since I was a child. While watching I found myself smiling and shaking my head yes, yes! My light bows to your light.

By: Barbara Radle

Barbara Radle — Fri, 17 Feb 2017 15:41:02 +0000

In reply to Angie. Absolutely the truth Read The People of the Lie by Scott Peck MD He writes about malignant narcissism and he writes further about exorcism and narcissism and exorcism He explains his definition of exorcism too which is not Hollywood style The last narc I knew I used to wonder if he needed an exorcism! It wasn't until I read Scott Peck that I took that seriously

By: Barbara Radle

Barbara Radle — Fri, 17 Feb 2017 15:32:26 +0000

In reply to Ty. Narcs use the word love but what love means to them is that you will do what they say and be under their control to boost and affirm their false image A narc cannot even sort through their trauma enough to see the light that is love Do not fool yourself that the situation has anything to do with love Only to heal yourself

By: Yvette

Yvette — Thu, 16 Feb 2017 22:57:37 +0000

Melanie, I am so glad I found your website. I am 8+ months into the divorce process with a very aggressive and antisocial narcissist whom I was married to for 23 years, lived with for 25 years, and trauma bonded to for 29 years. A few weeks back I hit a low and was fearful that my body was going to give up. Once a sun lover (I live in Florida), I started to realize I was becoming agoraphobic. I didn’t know the sunshine could hurt. 🙁 The symptom that disturbed me the most though was the obsessive thinking about the narcissist and the injustice of his continuing abuse that he is playing out in the court. My cry was: “I’d do anything to turn the switch with his name on it off in my head!” Shortly after, a wise friend sent me a video from your sight and I have been on here every day since. It is saving my life. I want to be free of him and I want to live out the life I was created by God to live. Very long story short, I have always been attracted to the spiritual life. Over the past two years I have been training in lay counseling for trauma and abuse. When I was a teenager, I was enamored with John Bradshaw and watched him on PBS. He was the therapist that coined the phrase “inner-child”. I had forgot about that until last year when I began my lay training. Memories also returned of being in early elementary school and wanting to help others learn about child abuse once I had discovered it was a reality. My NA entered my life at 13 years old, needless to say, the trajectory of my life became about securing and then fixing him for the next 29 years dragging him to everything that I thought could set him free. Last year I finally realized that I was trying to get from him what I was meant to get as a child and that no matter what I did, I could never get today what I was meant to get then, and I needed to become the adult that cared for me and gave me what I needed. One of those things was to go to school; I felt free enough to acknowledge and voice my desire to return to college to get my degree and become a therapist. I let my grip on him go and started to enforce boundaries. Eventually he left me and my three children in an unannounced but dramatic fashion and served me with divorce papers 3 weeks later. I had to drop out of school (because he also took all the money), which was the second time in my life I had to drop out of school because he left without warning (the first time was 22 years prior – oh how I wish I would have learned then). I know I am meant to heal and pursue my call as a lightworker. I know that is what this whole experience has been about. I am so glad I found your website. It is a true source of life and healing to me and I will do whatever I can to help others heal from this kind of crazy-making abuse and live their one and only life with joy and delight and freedom.

By: Debbie

Debbie — Mon, 06 Feb 2017 17:40:54 +0000

Hi Melanie– I just sent you an initial comment on my situation in another post. Mine is a long sad story with my narcissist– who — I never even had a ‘real’ relationship with where we dated normally- I never met his friends or family– he used the excuse first that he wanted to wait till his kids were older–we separated after me seeing no upgrade to our relationship after 7 years of waiting for the upgrade… And it didn’t come- separated 3 years– then reconnected– his kids out of college then but now his excuse was his life was not his own– because he was the main caregiver for his 94 year old Dad and 93 year old step mom with Alzheimers— I myself at this point had my 91 year old mom with me— so I kind of understood–that it kind of made sense the relationship had to stay kind of low key—- but he ALWAYS fed me the HOPE that we were going to end up together–
Let’s just enjoy the times we can spend with each other for now—It’s a long story if you could find my other post from today it explains everything—(even the prior relationship I had with him before my husband))–but now I’m talking about our 232nd time around– after 14 years altogether leading me on– He recently discarded me because I called him out. I told him I have been really reading the Bible and feel that the two of us have been fake Christians—-and that I wanted to be a truer more faithful Christian—- and boom– he was pretty much gone and won’t talk to me now–
Now not only am I a really nice looking woman— I am extremely sweet–demur and submissive by nature– the type of woman who wants to put her man on the pedestal. You see I think in every relationship–every person fits in one of two molds— You either are the “type” of person who. #1) Wants& Needs a Prize………or…….
You are the “type” of person who
#2) Wants& Needs to BE THE Prize

I have always thought I should write a book on that subject— because I believe it’s so true

I obviously have always wanted and needed to HAVE a Prize !!! What I look for in a man— is first and formost-
ATTRACTION—which to me has been in my lifetime as RARE as finding a piece of gold on the ground !!!!! So for me– what I seek– what I want and need in a mate is someone I view as a prize—– I do not like being the prize to the other person. But the trick is finding someone I could feel an attraction for– I won beauty pageants growing up- many guys wanted to go out with me– but I was attracted to none of them— until the unattainable narcissist came into my life— now his attention fed my ego— and only his attention
Therein lies my problem— so I have wondered— am I a narcissist also ???? The only reason I feel confident that I’m not– is because I have such a good and true heart– I have never in my life used a man to buy me things etc and lead them on–the way my Narcissist has done to me— because I have a heart and a conscience— I could never lead someone on that I knew liked me and I didn’t feel the same. I would never want to hurt someone like that– In fact because I have always been so ultra picky – as to the chemistry thing- I have been alone for many years of my life– because I know myself — I want the attraction– that’s all I want— I will not force myself just to be with someone that I’m not attracted to just because they are a great and good person— if the chemistry is not there in the beginning— it does not grow — it just dosnt– and I would not ever want to lead men on or hurt them— because I know I have a good heart. But I know I must have some kind of problem— I have wondered if I was perhaps a massachist ??? If I never had a good healthy 2-way love relationship like I did with my husband— I would say I just might be– because other then my husband– the other 2-3 relationships I had were with a narcissist or emotionally unavailable person—-
Meeting my husband and finally having a real 2 way love with someone I viewed as a prize was the best feeling in the world—- and for me— was like a miracle-
Long story I put in the other post- but we had 4 beautiful kids- and I was blessed to have that happy love for a lot of years before our breakup due to him getting involved with drugs-(he unfortunately was a self destructive personality….smoked alot- Frank a lot b-4 the drug issue–but a really good true person)- me getting a legal separation from him then seeing my prior Narcissist from before I met my husband– talk about the worst mistake of my life!!! 7 years seeing him again but I allowed him to disrespect me all in the name of attraction and how valuable that was to me—no upgrade in7 years- then I went back with my husband to try to mend things- we had only 3 years as he had gotten cancer and died a horrific death at the age of 59– it was all complicated and gut wrenchedly sad-
Then about a year after my husband died I was back with my Narcissist—then 6 more years with him till he just discarded me finally 4 months ago– due to me calling him out in a big way and he didn’t want to deal with the guilt he would have to feel I guess so he has totally cut me off——- and I feel that short of getting a lobatamy I will never recover from this person. Now my Narcissist is 65 years old this year—I honestly felt this guy loved me in his own wierd way and I truly loved- love him unconditionally– no matter how unfairly he has treated me— I have always just accepted what he was capable of giving me- and I always just accepted it his way because he always led me to believe when he was ready to settle down it would be with me–
And that— HE- was that dream person I always wanted—and I believed I was going to have one day– that I would be the last girl standing— because no one else could ever adore him as much as me!!! But now find myself 56 and totally alone– I have never dated anyone else in all these years— he is all that I have known—he’s all I want for myself for the rest of my life—- I now I am faced with having to accept it was all a lie— and he can just skip off to someone else like i never even exsisted—- when he was everything to me!
I don’t have a lack of confidence for I know I’m a good looking woman who could get a lot of men to want to date me— and unknow in java a good and honest kind heart–
My problem is and always has been::
MY INABILITY to FIND A MAN I CAN
BE ATTRACTED TO !!!!!! They simply don’t exsist—- in my entire 56 years of life I can count on ONE hand how many men I have ever been able to find even a shrewd of attraction for !! And when I have found it-
I felt like it was GOD ORDAINED for me because it was like so rare for me to find– it was like a miracle !!!! So that is the main problem—- I have been strong enough of a person to put up with years upon years of being alone and by myself– I have never just gone from one person to another just to be with someone— no for me it is more a spoiledness maybe–‘- that I want what I want and if I can’t have it– I will have nothing—–But lonliness sucks—- so that is the reason I have my sometimes that I was happier to be with my Narcissist on his terms— then to not have him in my life at all—that is why I have accepted his crumbs and accepted a disrespectful relationship as long as I have-
Because I know me— and I know that the reality of me finding another man that I can feel this kind of attraction for….( or for that matter ANY kind of attraction for)— is quite honestly slim to none. I had a hard enough time in my 20’s finding it—so at 56 !!-
I doubt it highly—- and I’m just being realistic here !!!! So for me—- I feel there really is no answer—– if I was the kind of woman who found attraction and some chemistry with men easier– I wouldn’t be so depressed– for it would be easier to say– well there’s other fish in the sea– I’m moving on to find another better one for me-!!! So….I have a big problem because I don’t have a lot of Hope that I will ever find any other man attractive not even a little. Believe me I would be really happy if I could just feel a small amount of an attraction for someone– enough to grow due to him being a good person etc—
But realisticly I know the chances of that like I said are slim to none! For literally I have looked thru thousands of guys pictures on dating sites— and I will find ZERO attractive—
So— I have a really really wierd problem–
Have you ever heard of anyone else like me with this wierd delema ??? I honestly don’t like being mistreated—-i just have put up with it because I can’t seem to find attraction to a man with a good heart…..(except for the fluke of my husband)–…..now I live in the past putting our wedding video on and remembering how happy I was then—…and knowing that outside of my husband– the only other man that made me just feel happiness was my narcissist— and now i feel I don’t have any source of real happiness at all in my life and it’s very depressing and is taking everything I have right now not to literally beg him to come back to me —part of me so wants to do that and the other part wants me to hang on to my self-worth.

By: Deb

Deb — Fri, 02 Dec 2016 20:29:44 +0000

Hi Melanie, wow ! I have been seeing 11:11 or 9:11, 3:11 etc etc . By daughter was born 11 6 11 at 11 and have been only learning recently about light workers ! Don’t really knowing what to make of it really. I have been on so many spiritual paths since 22, broaching on enlightenment, reading so many self help books etc etc. always through my whole life getting so much joy in helping others, seeing them heal from something I said did bring light to my heart. But then they wouldn’t need me anymore so I’d move on and find someone else to heal ( I guess ) I’ve always suffered inside, but then know there is so much light as well. I have been in a 14 year friendship with a narssisist ( although i keep second guessing myself at thinking this of her, as feel bad about this if I am wrong ) but it has been so tough, so much abuse, conditions, manipulation, stalking, a little single white female, control, endless tears, I never feel worthy, always beneath, Etc etc. I have gone no contact for 8 weeks now and only found you on here as I was missing her and wanted to see what to do about it. And then your video came up and honestly I feel like I have never nodded in agreement to what you said before in my life. I just got you, got it, you gave me tingles, there are also tears from my eyes. I always felt there’s something else, but then why would I believe I’m chosen, or special so I brush it off, thinking don’t be silly you are just a number in a giant universe, but then consciousness speaks again going against this theory ! I dont know but am so pleased I found you and connected, thank you x