Melanie Tonia Evans

Mankind’s Movement To Evolve From Narcissism

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans Permalink 3
Written By   Melanie Tonia Evans

This article is about a very big topic, and one I believe it’s the perfect time to talk about.

Lots of people are wondering what is going on. Why are so many people going through hard times? What has this got to do with abuse? And what has it got to do with victims of abuse?

I believe lots, and that’s something I want to talk about in this article, including information about what I believe is really going on.

Many people are sensing things are different now. Things feel different, and precarious and even frightening.

I know a lot of people are faced with their greatest fears and insecurities, and suffering greater emotional battles than they can previously remember.

It’s like everyone’s stuff is coming up for them.

Everyone I talk to has stories of how their life has recently gone through drastic changes, or they know of many people whose worlds have recently been turned upside down.

Many people’s relationships are splitting up, including the relationships we may have thought were stable and ‘tight’.

Additionally, many people’s businesses are failing, or they have suffered retrenchment. Many people have lost the possessions that were dear to them. I also know of many, many people suddenly contracting all sorts of illnesses – even serious ones. In fact many people’s lives bare no resemblance to what they thought their life was two years ago.

I also believe that narcissistic abuse is becoming so much more obvious. Relationships based on fear, control and exploitation are exploding. We are seeing this happen personally to people around us, as well as publically through the media. What was once hidden is coming to the surface. Narcissism is being exposed, and people are learning on a much greater scale what a narcissist / sociopath is.


Our Rapidly Changing World

When we look at our world, we can recognise there have been drastic changes, within a very short time span. In the last 200 years, in Westernised countries, women now have legal, property and voting rights. For the first time in thousands of years, women have been able to survive, even abundantly, without a man.

No longer are children working in mines.

Love relationships are no longer gender defined and based on survival needs, but are now demanding greater emotional mutuality to continue.

In many parts of the world, differences are now embraced, rather than the fearful segregations of different nationalities, skin colours and religions of yesteryears.

Technology is updating at lightning speed, we are seeing unprecedented levels of information accessibility, as well as technology and medicine that has increasing our wellbeing and longevity.

Yet, despite these advancements in our life, many people are realising their happiness is not granted by technology, acquisitions, greater life spans or even increased rights.

A lot has changed very quickly. But has it created a world, on a personal and collective level, of true harmony and wellbeing?

When we see the epidemic levels of ego, fear, manipulation and abuse being passed from generation to generation and escalating, through all tiers of society – we need to acknowledge something has gone horribly wrong.


What Isn’t Working in Our World?

Many things have changed for the better, but there are clearly systems which haven’t. We have been moving towards more compassion, equality and Oneness in some ways, but are still struggling in many others.

We only need to look at our world to see that the last 5,000 years hasn’t brought about collective emotional wellbeing.

This era of ‘Power’ (the last 5000 years) that many civilisations had predicted for centuries, was a time of growing consumerism, and man defining himself as per acquisition, personal power and outer accomplishment, in order to know his ‘worth’.

This era is what Paul Levy wrote about in his book, “Dispelling Wetiko.” The term “Wetiko” Is a Native American Indian term meaning ‘a parasite of the human mind’. Wetiko is coined as the psychic virus infecting humankind – the egoic madness of basing inner worthiness on acquisitions and external forces.

The truth is – Wetiko is referring to narcissism.

The 5000 year long era of Power created a belief of lack, separatism and the need to compete. Hence a world of ’dog eat dog’, and ‘survival of the fittest’ was valued. As a result, consumerism and class distinction became about ‘the haves’ and ‘the have nots’.

Institutions in the last 5000 years have created separatism, not Oneness. Many religious and political systems have asserted ‘My way is the only way’. As a result, countries have been attacked, and millions of people have been murdered, in the name of: “I am right and you are wrong.”

Absolutely, there are wonderful religions and communities who embrace Oneness, apply inclusion by accepting differences, and promote self-worth, self-love and true collectiveness and harmony – these are not the institutions I am talking about.

The ones I am referring to, have committed genocide on a huge scale, ordained by a higher authority (usually a man-made narcissistic version of ‘god’). The murdering of millions of women – any woman who was connected to arts and crafts, the land, healing, herbs or her intuition in any way, or suspected of  –  was just one example of these barbaric atrocities that had nothing to do with either ‘Love’ or ‘God’.

These genocides were committed without sanity or reason. They were fuelled by fear, ego and the thirst for power and control.

This 5000 year reign of power was based on externalism – if you don’t follow my outer control, you will be shunned or discredited, rendered inoperable, or tragically, in many cases, exterminated.

Mankind was programmed to look outside of ‘self’, through control and fear of consequences. We were told we were minuscule, unworthy and emotionally and morally incapable. We were told that we must answer to an outside source to be ‘saved’, and if we didn’t acquiesce we suffered wrath or threats that terrified our soul.

We were not allowed to tune into the inherent Oneness, divinity and love that we all have coded within us –  when we love, accept and embrace ourselves, and are not toxically poisoned and traumatised with control and fear. Collectively we were disconnected from our inherent state of love, wholeness and Oneness.

This is insanity at its worst – because organically when we are ‘at One’, we are whole, and we are peace and love. Then, this is exactly what we see, promote and co-generate with others.

People who are whole and at peace are not needy and empty and they have no need to compete. They don’t need to win at someone or something else’s expense, and they have no need to force other people to change in order to feel happy.

Wholeness by definition means exactly that – being whole.

How on earth could we feel whole, when our established role models expressed enormous requirements – in fact demanded them?

To add insult to injury, our apparently ‘needy, not-whole’ role models who required us to be a certain way in order to be ‘fulfilled’, were vengeful or threatened us with our own demise if we didn’t comply.

That is not a model of wholeness, peace or true spiritual unconditional love. In fact, it’s incredibly easy, after being abused by a narcissist to recognise this is a narcissistic model. And of course, as you know, your own narcissist identically vowed and declared his or her control, demands, conditional love, conditional acceptance and abusive behaviour was for your own good.

In stark contrast, spiritual unconditional love goes like this: “I have no requirement for you to change in order for me to be ‘love or ‘whole’. If our values don’t align then I allow you to be you, and I love you enough to set you free.  I am now free to be my own version of life, with people and situations who are my reality.”

If the world wasn’t so focused on fear and pushing back and trying to force certain people to be a certain way in order to be at peace – it naturally would be.

If we had been encouraged, or even allowed, to connect healthily to own Inner Being,  inherent inner guidance and already coded in Higher Power, we would naturally be whole, and we would treat life and others accordingly.

Lecturing, prescribing, forcing, controlling, power-tripping and abusing in order to try to get self-serving narcissistic needs met, has never created healthy results. It only generates more fear, more pushback, more separation, more division and abuse, and more of the unconscious illusions that keep fear, pain and the struggle going.

The fear of separation and externalism all relates to the same core wound – the illusion of: “In my own energy I can’t be whole and at peace, and therefore I have to get or change something or someone outside of me to try to feel better.”

The intense discord on this planet all began with intense separation and emptiness emotionally within our own individual selves.


The Shifting of Eras

Fortunately many people are waking up out of the trance.

Now, more than ever, there is a huge shift of consciousness – with the recognition that personal happiness and wellbeing actually has nothing to do with acquisition or intelligence or power, but is in fact defined by our emotional relationship with ourselves.

The interesting thing about the last few years is: many people are losing all of the outer things, labels and identities that they thought defined them.

The greatest gift of having nothing to cling to on ‘the outside’ is: we have nowhere left to turn expect inside. This is where we finally discover the truth – that what we were scrambling for all this time outside of ourselves, was inside of us all along.

This is precisely how most people experience personal catharsis.

I certainly don’t believe there is any coincidence that so many people’s lives, the version they believed to be ‘real’, has broken down, leaving them with the truth, if they choose to embrace it.

Many people pulling away from the illusion: I have to get myself from outside of myself, are discovering that their natural inner coding knows love, knows Oneness, knows there can be enough for everyone, and knows that a deeper part inside connects to a higher guidance system, as well as love, peace and wholeness.

This connection to Oneness promotes growth and the highest potential of self, and adds to life and others holistically, rather than needing to reduce, take and abuse in order to succeed.

When we are in touch with the deeper, inner and higher aspects of ourselves, we connect to the bigger universal understandings of life.  Our True Self then starts emanating forth from within us, as love and expansion without fear and neediness. This opens up for us the ability to generate and receive our greatest joy, most expansive wisdom, most divine expressions of love and highest flourishing – and not just for ourselves.

If it was just for ourselves, we would only be catering to our small needy disconnected separated self. This is ego consciousness, which is unconsciousness – fear, separatism and lack.

That is narcissism.

When our wellbeing caters to the entire Field of Life, it caters to our True Self – our expansive self that is ‘all of it’, the self that is connected as Oneness in life to everyone and everything.

In such a state, how on earth could we harm or diminish another, when we know we would only be damaging an aspect of ourselves?

Many societies talked about a time of reckoning – a time of change of eras of consciousness, and a time when life as we know it would no longer be able to sustain itself. History has proven all eras collapse; they all have their time periods and their endings.

I believe we are in exactly that time, the collapse of the Era of Power, which to all extent purposes is already dead, and simply going through the decaying process. The green shoots of re-birth are all around us. I believe we are being forced, whether we like it or not, to let go of our false disconnected egoic selves and evolve.

It’s up to us whether we go down with the ship, or we choose to evolve to a new way that our psyches, souls, and world desperately needs.


The Painful and Destructive Results of Ego

Egoic separatism and externalisation is self-destruction. Anything or anyone that needs to consume, trying to fill an empty void, not only causes destruction of the environment and others, but also themselves.

The Era of Power promoted individuals valuing their egos above the collective values of personal responsibility, truth, authenticity and wholesome and holistic connection with self, each other and the world in general.

This is exactly the environment for narcissism to flourish.

It also created an environment of people who were suffering enough of their own disconnection, inner emptiness, powerlessness, fear and anxiety to be attracted to and mined by narcissists.

When a world is trained to be needy, empty and addicted, choices are not good, and they don’t generate healthy results.

The world’s financial system is in chaos. Foods are classified which aren’t foods. The quality of our planet’s air, food, water and soil is seriously affected. We are publicly mesmerized by celebrity’s lives that convince us how we are not good enough and need to buy more.

Pharmaceutical drug pushing keeps us alive, sick, and medicated.  Many of the structures of psychology and medicine have kept people entrenched in remaining unconscious, powerless and dependent –  a life of persistent symptoms that forever require management, rather than finding one’s own true consciousness, and one’s own inherent ability and power to be whole and healed.

All in the name of ‘ feeding the economy’ and  ‘substituting beingness with havingness’ , which has been the template for the last 5000 years.

Have you noticed how so many truths are being flushed to the surface now? Can you see how many people are questioning, and lies are being exposed individually and collectively? Can you understand that many systems are crumbling? Many, many people now are turning away from these old outdated egoic systems, and developing, finding, generating and connecting to holistic ones.

Our health and our choices are to do with consciousness. When we are deeply unconscious we don’t feel whole, and we choose instant gratification and quick fixes to try to dull our inner pain, rather than dealing with our consciousness. We choose and re-choose unhealthy foods, unhealthy habits and unhealthy people – regardless of how much these choices hurt us – and we totally ignore our inner guidance which we have turned away from.

In this disconnected state, we believe our worthiness is dependent on outer approval. We hand the sovereignty of our inner being away, because we aren’t listening to it and we don’t honour it. We feel disempowered, and we don’t believe we can be healthy, whole or loved.

If we haven’t woken up for our slumber, we remain stuck in the programmed cycles of unconsciousness – where we are needy, dependent, trapped and sick. We are reliant on love addiction, more stuff to get in debt to, more non-foods to eat, more medication to take, more ways to avoid going within –  simply more ways to stay stuck in the loop of forever chasing our tail as we plummet into deeper unconsciousness –  merely grasping at false substitutes trying to claw our way out.

People, despite an improved quality of life, are suffering incredible and intense emotional and spiritual starvation. The greater the emptiness on the inside, the more the compulsion to try to fill it from the outside.

When we are conditionally positioned in our minds, we are always precarious. We believe “I can’t be happy until (this condition is fulfilled).” Then we discover even when ‘that’ happens we are still not happy.

This dis-ease has nothing to do with what we are or aren’t getting – it’s symptomatic of inner separation and emptiness. It is about unconsciousness, and both narcissists and co-dependents suffer from this. In fact, our entire human conditioning is modelled on it.

Inner emptiness, in the energy of this new Era of Co-creative Consciousness, is now more quickly than ever creating the result of the identical inner state. This is exactly what ancient civilisations talked about – as this era progresses, it will reach the critical point where people will no longer be able to avoid the truth – I am creating all of this for myself as per my personal levels of consciousness.

Naturally, what this means is blame and shame are futile. That is exactly the narcissistic model – the extreme unconsciousness of: “I am never responsible for my bad fortune. It is always someone else’s fault.”

It’s a fact, people are feeling more heightened depression, anxiety and emotional disappointment than they ever have. Why is it that even people who seemingly ‘have it all’ can be some of the most addictive, self-medicating, depressed and suicidal people on the planet?

During this massive shift from one era to the next, we are discovering a powerful and unavoidable truth – that no amount of ‘getting’ is working anymore.

And now, in this time of intense change, even the false substitutes that represented ‘getting’ are being ripped away – leaving us with where we need to be to get us and this world healthy – with ourselves.


Waking Up From The Trance

This evolution period calls for raising our consciousness, the coming out of the trance of separatism, disconnection, egoic neediness and externalism.

Importantly, in this time of transition, we can make it our mission to let go of the false beliefs and traumas which are not Who We Really Are, and we can inwardly free ourselves to become more and more in tune with our natural inner guidance and our Higher Self.

Then, we start to make conscious choices about loving and nourishing ourselves with healthy choices, healthy self-talk and thoughts, healthy food and healthy people. Then, we naturally unconditionally love and approve of ourselves non-reliant on what other people do or don’t decide to do.

We no longer sell our souls out, or our life – trying to force others and things to be our ‘source of self’, or by trying to seek outer approval.

We honour the sovereignty of our self – our True Self – and we deeply wake up and understand the truth: we are the creator of our own experience, and that was always generated from our inner beingness.

Co-creative consciousness is about Oneness, it is about realising that ‘we are all one’. What this means is a quantum physics theory:  we are all made of the same stuff, and more than that we are all connected.

We know ourselves as the One Soul. We know we are more than just a part of God/ Source / Creation / Consciousness or All That Is…

We know we just are it.

This means what I do to you – I do to myself. It means that every action or non-action I take affects the entire Field of Life in some way. It also means that every person I meet, and every experience I have is showing me an aspect of myself. What I don’t like in others represents my own disowned/ non-integrated parts and still unconscious parts.

It means: the illusion of separation and that there is something ‘out there’ happening to me is no longer a view that serves me.

The Mayans talked about this time of ascension. It is about growing past our needy, starved, disconnected, empty selves trying to fill up from the outside, to realise that the very reason we chased ‘stuff’ was to get a whole, fulfilled self – and it was within us all along – non-reliant on conditions outside of us.

We are evolving to understanding the incredible vibrational, emotional Creators that we really are. If we are connected as One to the Field of Life, then the control centre of our life is our beingness. It is our beingness that is calling forth what we know as ‘Life’ into our experience.

Then the real question is:  Who am I presently being?

We also realise that no amount of ‘doing’ or ‘getting’ can compensate for a disconnected beingness.

This is the wakeup out of the trance, realising if we are trying to generate a life from a False Disconnected Self, the results are now slapping us hard with more fear, more anxiety and pain, more need to compete, more unworthiness, more ‘not winning’, and more ‘coming up empty’.


Spiritual Evolution

Evolution can be viewed as Darwin’s theory of physical survival, or maybe we could look at evolution as a deeper, more spiritual purpose.

Maybe it is to be closer to God, Source and our True Nature. Maybe it is to conjoin with Oneness, and to know our connection to Life and each other, rather than operating as separated, empty, lonely, frustrated, competing, distrustful beings.

Maybe it is to unleash and connect to our true power. The Infinite One Soul that we are connected to, not through our logical consciousness (which is incredibly limited – most people’s minds are their worst enemy), but through a greater force, a creative beingness, and expansiveness that is connected to the whole.

The huge irony is, in this era of Co-creative consciousness, inner freedom, peace, love, connectivity and abundance generates outer identical results – as the pure expansive truth: my beingness is generating my life.

This has nothing to do with unconscious ego emptiness, which is: “I need that person / thing to grant me proof of my worthiness.”  The conscious True Self is simply expanding, and already knows itself as ‘expansion and Oneness’, non-reliant on physical evidence.

The True Self is unconditionally fulfilled. There are no requirements, demands or conditions when:

I feel whole, love and Oneness simply because I know Who I Am, and because  I exist.”

That, I promise you is your natural state, without the programmed disconnected false and fearful beliefs which have separated you from knowing yourself.

Miracles of abundance and wellbeing emerge from this level of creation, when we are connected to the whole. The ‘doing’ and ‘getting’ becomes inspired, radiant and wonderful – because it is an expansion of the flourishing of our True Self connected to life holistically, and Life is co-generatively injected with wellbeing and flourishing as a result.

The crucial shift of eras is incredibly relevant to this community, because I believe we are shifting gears from survival fear, into authentic creation.

This new era is not about narcissists or clinging to narcissists. The cycle of narcissistic abuse, and being victimised by narcissistic abuse is one of fear, clinging, disconnection from self and being precariously focused outwards to try to emotionally survive.

That is not our soul’s truth.

Is it coincidence that we are in this community together, at this time, focused on the ultimate shift in consciousness – which is coming out of the clutches of abuse and narcissistic egoic false power in order to claim our True Selves, and true power as authentic connected holistic beings?

I don’t believe so…

This evolutionary orientation is totally what myself and the MTE team stand for.

I look forward to answering your comments and questions below.

Please note there are also a few limited spaces in my next free Webinar on Friday, which shows you the direct path to going inwards and evolving yourself.

If you can’t make it on the day it is still worth signing up as you will receive a replay of the event which you can listen to at any time.

Reserve my spot for the 3 Keys To Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse Webinar.

I look forward to helping you find the power of your True Self very soon…


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Melanie Tonia Evans is an international narcissistic abuse recovery expert. She is an author, radio host, and founder of Quanta Freedom Healing and The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program. Melanie's healing and teaching methods have liberated thousands of people from the effects of narcissistic abuse world-wide.

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35 Thoughts on Mankind’s Movement To Evolve From Narcissism
    Lori Hykaway
    July 10, 2014

    What an amazing article Melanie! I have never come across a piece of writing that integrated so many concepts, so very well. I have read a lot about many of the issues discussed here but never in a way that showed how they are all intertwined. Fanstastic job! Very eye opening!

      August 8, 2014

      ditto that!!! extremely well written and drew me in deeper and deeper as i read. All that i know, is mentioned in that article…reminding me…and giving more detail to that which is not totally understood. to know does not necessarily mean to understand, nor even to ‘practice’. I am evolving forward and this article summed up the evolution.

  • Melanie Tonia Evans
    July 10, 2014

    Hi Lori,

    I am so pleased this resonated with you.

    Thank you and Bless 🙂

    Mel xo

      July 11, 2014

      Brilliant article, hitting All the nails on the head, Mel. Vital, essential, much-needed information for our times. Thank you.

    peter mochrie
    July 10, 2014

    thankyou,such a profound piece of writing is very inspiring at this time….there is a cleansing upon us and your article is validation that a positive outcome is nigh….bravo

    Sharon Hill
    July 10, 2014

    Thank you for the wonderful insights and for bringing to consciousness our every day struggle with narcissism. You are so right that the struggle is huge and also at a tipping point; because people are so unhappy, and are searching for truth and guidance. My daughters talk of the negative messages given daily to them as women from media about their ‘Not enough ness’ Your words are sustenance; food for thought and positive change.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 11, 2014

      Hi Sharon,

      You are very welcome.

      I am so glad you are feeling this necessary shift, and realise it is so much deeper and wider than just being about ‘abuse’.

      Mel xo

    July 10, 2014

    Thank you Melanie. This article sums up everything I am going through lately. Such a relief to understand what it is all about.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 11, 2014

      Hi lldi,

      you are so welcome.

      It is powerful to realise everyone is going through this shift!

      Mel xo

    July 11, 2014

    Soul by soul, we are getting there! SOOOOOO glad that I have found your work!!!

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 11, 2014

      Hi Christine,

      I am so glad you are here too!

      Yes, soul by soul we are getting there!!


      Mel xo

    July 11, 2014

    Could not agree more. The topic you are tackling really is so much more than just the specific type of abuse.

    Everywhere you look people are struggling with anxiety, depression, lack of self-worth. A plethora of ills could be healed by the re-connection to the higher power and our true source.

    I’m helping spread the word every chance I get and such a believer in this mission of taking responsibility for our own healing- its GREAT to be able to offer someone tools that really are almost magical in their effectiveness.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 11, 2014

      Hi Sarah,

      it is true so many people are struggling, and the true healing is about re-connection.

      That is wonderful that you are doing your bit to raise consciousness Sarah. Thank you.

      Mel xo

    Nora Ayala
    July 11, 2014

    Dear Melanie,

    This is your greatest article so far. Looking forward for more to come. days ago, I found myself asking to a friend what was wrong with the world these days. well, today, you were able to give me a great answer.
    Thanks in love,

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 11, 2014

      Hi Nora,

      I am so glad the article resonated deeply with you.

      Isn’t it astounding how Life delivers the answers, when we show up and are available to hear them?

      You are so welcome, and much love to you.

      Mel xo

    July 11, 2014

    Beautiful !!! Thank you !!

    LaurenR Lauren
    July 11, 2014

    I am an enrolled Native American in a federally recognized Tribal Nation. I am ‘mixed breed’. Meaning I am of European and Native blood. I studied for five years and have a degree from a prominent Native American College alongside a Holistic Health degree. I would like to ad to this article two things. In many Native tribes one is not allowed to call oneself a medicine person. Ever. The tribe decides that. Most ‘medicine’ people are born into that role. In other words they are trained since childhood to heal. It is not widely discussed but I have surmised in a good European explanation is that if one is not raised since childhood with a highly subdued ego and taught in strict traditional methods then healing can become a ‘free for all’ of sorts and dangerous. Methodologies become experiments and not time tested by Elders of generations past that carry wisdom. Peoples souls are involved. As children our egos can be shaped and formed to fulfill specific roles. Adults have enormous egos unless trained since childhood. In Native cultures acceptance of money is forbidden for healing services. The Indigenous Empires pre Colonial civilization are often looked at as Euphoric societies and falsely so. While the medicine men of those times espoused true and good spiritual philosophies and prophecies the Empires of those days were as violent and awful as today’s. Riddled with pollution in the forms of burning of fires/ sewage/garbage etc. There was constant warring. Greed.Prostitution.Slavery of children from the kidnapping of other enemy tribes people. The huge Native empires in North and Central/South America raped and pillaged other smaller tribes that traded metals and farmed food for these huge Empires. Raping/ taking of slaves and persecution for different religious ways was also a thing happening. As a wife (as he referred to me) of a traditional Navajo man of several years I feel I have lived and experienced allot from my Tribal Nation and others. The Navajos believe there were other worlds before this one and were destroyed. That we are coming into a New World. This one will be destroyed. That it is ok. It is part of Evolution of man/woman and his/her thoughts. All Indigineous people come from vastly different religions and Gods. Their values and ways are different from one tribe to another. The Hopi prophecies all have come true but one or two.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 11, 2014

      Hi LaurenR Lauren,

      It is so true that ego has been rampant through so much of mankind.

      It is also very true that a great deal of ego, violation and exploitation has occurred with healers of all denominations contemporary and supposedly spiritual.

      Hence why it is so important to be connected to one’s own inner guidance and inner wisdom, and to not take on outer authority or assistance when it ‘doesn’t feel right’.

      The truth of Oneness is regardless of what we believe or ‘follow’ – at the most fundamental level we are the One Soul.

      Thank you for your post!

      Mel xo

    July 11, 2014

    Excellent article. It puts the diverse research I’ve been doing in a single perspective. I knew it must all fit together but I didn’t know how and it seemed far off to me.
    Isn’t it strange that it is recovery from narcissism that brought it all together? More discoveries and epiphanies. Gratefully accepted. 🙂

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 11, 2014

      Hi Claire,

      thank you.

      It truly does all fit together. It is wonderful this experience brought us to this – a profound gift of truth at the highest and deepest level.

      A gift that does set us free.

      Mel xo

    LaurenR Lauren
    July 11, 2014

    One last thing. I read all your material. I love it. Very thought provoking. I have lived poor on the reservation and on my own. I am in a stage of wealth in my life. So wealthy I do not ‘need’ to work to pay my bills. But I do work so I can thrive not just survive. Wealth is a wonderful thing if ones core self is coming from spiritual power. I see all my material things as reflections of me. Living in Beauty.One can be penniless or a millionaire: depending on ones spiritual health one can be happy or not. I lived in poverty and to me it was oppressive.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 11, 2014

      Hi LaurenR Lauren,

      Money, wealth and abundance is an energy – like all energy – an expression of ‘self’.

      Where many people get confused is they believe spirituality has to be poverty, or ‘going without’.

      This was never the intention of our True Self, which knows itself as expansion and wellbeing,and there is enough for everyone if consciousness is raised.

      When we are expanding and free rather than being empty and ‘needing’, abundance and expansion on all levels is a natural by-product.

      Mel xo

    July 12, 2014

    Melanie you are an amazing person/medicine woman/Shekinah (The Shekinah is held by some to represent the feminine attributes of the presence of God (Shekinah being a feminine word in Hebrew).

    Thank you for sharing your life, suffering and wisdom.
    I have come out of hell with my N, after three years of legal B.S, and all the other traumas that go with it. Working the NARP program has set me free in a way I could never, EVER have predicted. I still work it to clear myself of the negativity which clogs the drains of making good decisions. It works if you work it. (But it is work!)

    Please keep doing your beautiful work, beautifully.

    July 12, 2014

    p.s sorry if I offended anyone by using the terms medicine woman or Shekinah- I hadn’t read any of the other comments when I posted- just wanted to share my gratitude. Perhaps it was culturally insensitive of me. I see Melanie as a great spiritual healer.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 13, 2014

      Hi Becca,

      Thank you for your lovely post. I believe true unconditional love is the allowing of anyone to have their beliefs and orientations. If that causes offence, that truly is saying more about the person being offended. If it is not their truth, there is no need for it to be taken on.

      Shine who you are Becca, and who and what is your truth will glow back at you.

      Mel xo

    Shawn Montazemi
    July 13, 2014

    I believe in cycle theory. All I can say is narcissism is absolutely everywhere. I live in America and the general population are complete zombies. Totally disconnected from source. It is so sad to see the iconic “John Wayne” American male and “Grace Kelly” American female degraded to helpless, spineless, mindless sheep posting selfies on Facebook to extract energy from the cloud of the internet. So hopefully we are at the end of a major narcissism upcycle.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      July 13, 2014

      Hi Shawn,

      It is sad to see where human consciousness has gone. However, what is really important for all of us is to understand what ‘consciousness’ really means, and how powerful it is.

      Whatever we ‘see’ and ‘believe’ is generated more powerfully by our consciousness. This is why the entire focus on the negativity of narcissism only feeds it and manifests it more.

      The true solution can only and will only ever happen one person at a time purging our own negativity, fear and pain and ‘seeing’ and ‘believing’ ourselves our world and other people completely differently – and completely detaching from what is not well being and healthy.

      Then we will see the old way die out and dissolve, and we will dream and create a better dream.

      Mel xo

        Shawn Montazemi
        July 15, 2014

        Thank you Mel for reminding me.

        I already knew what you said; however, because it is such a different way of thinking for me right now, I still get locked into mind and body, my five-sense illusionary reality. Our “reality” is NOT what we “see” or “believe”. What we “see” or “believe” is just our consciousness downloading a finite sliver of infinite possibilities from source and then our mind-body computer constructs our “reality” from this finite sliver of information.

        So to change the world, we must choose to “see” and “believe” the world as we want to see it. Stop focusing on the negativity, fear, and pain; otherwise, we will pull this “informational energy” from source and then it becomes our reality. Like attracts Like. Now as individuals, or God’s nanotech or God’s worker bees as I like to think about it, we can not change the “collective” consciousness. We CAN change our personal consciousness and in doing so, we can change the collective consciousness one person at a time. I get it.

        Again, thanks for reminding me. This knowledge is still new for me and I am exercising my “consciousness” muscle for the first time in a very long time.

    LaurenR Lauren
    July 13, 2014

    I am of European and Native blood so I have my own cultural thoughts about things. My intention in sharing was to give relevant cultural knowledge pertaining to this article. Asian culture is opposite in that they are very open in sharing their spirituality and precepts. They do not percieve it as theft as Natives here do.I have studied different cultures and healing modalities for decades. I am paid for my healing services as a massage therapist; reiki and reflexology practitioner. I am not a healer. Being a high level Healer is a level of healing practice that I percieve my Native culture to be correct about. I am too busy healing myself. Although what I do is healing and some of my Native clients compliment me. I was told by a psych therapist in 2009 that one of my parents was a narcissist long before I found NARP. I use this NARP material to help me. I am sorry if anyone percieved an insult. That was not my intent.

    Kelly Simmons
    July 17, 2014

    This is a wonderful article/blog. I want to share it with everyone i know. I had a epiphany 6 months ago,or as i prefer to say God whispering in my ear. “We are One”, this includes those that have passed before us. I felt that my purpose or at least part of my purpose is to get this message out. I have tried to explain the epiphany stumbling over my words. This is it exactly. I had no idea when i discovered they’re was proof as well as words to describe the abuse i have suffered for56 years. My mother is a Narcissistic sociopath. That this information would be so important to every bit of my life.
    I feel as if we are on the ground floor (can’t think of right word) of something that can define our future. Our children and grandchildrens future depends on this. The world cannot go on the way it is headed, with instagram and Facebook. The look at me, aren’t i great. Isn’t my food wonderful etc.
    I believe Benjamin Franklin said Technology was going to surpass Humanity. This is the now, we have reached this point. No talks, no eye to eye contact.
    ThAnk you Melanie for all your information.

    Tricia Sea
    October 14, 2015

    Dear Melonie,
    Thank you for this “big picture” explanation!
    I have had an increasingly strong intuitive feeling of this shift occouring in my awareness for several years. In fact, I believe that my traumatic experiences have been the doorways that, as I step through, bring me into an even greater clarity. Doing the work to find MY integrity leads me to see others doing this same work. We co-join in energetic responsibility and increase the “collective consciousness” allowing for the evolution for “what is possible” to move past the previous limits of “scarcity” and “fear”. Since I have started working with your program I have been awakened to the parts of myself that were holding onto the belief that I could not support myself physically or emotionally without “another’s love”. I am transforming these errors & clearing them from my physical & energetic body. Amazing changes are happening in my life and I am now finding more peace & fulfillment than I thought possible. As I work on this “small self” the “greater self” or consciousness is expanding rapidly. Beautiful harmony!

    November 7, 2017

    Excellent article. Totally resonates. We are shifting as a species in consciousness that’s for sure, one person at a time. Thanks to you Mel and The Narp program.❤️❤️❤️

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