Melanie Tonia Evans

6 Sneaky Tactics Narcissists Use At Christmas

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
32
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
32
  It’s so important to be prepared for the narcissist’s bag of tricks at Christmas time because traditionally this is a ‘hot-spot’ time when narcissists cause untold trauma to many. If you’ve been in a narcissistic relationship for some time you will probably have a great deal of trepidation, remembering just how horrible the narcissist made Christmas for you last year. Or maybe you haven’t experienced a painful narcissistic Christmas yet, and this may be one where you will need to be prepared. It can be so awful to experience all the ways that narcissists act out when Christmas threatens to upstage them, and there are a few specific things which narcissists do which are Universal, to try to bring every else’s good Christmas cheer down. (more…)

 

It’s so important to be prepared for the narcissist’s bag of tricks at Christmas time because traditionally this is a ‘hot-spot’ time when narcissists cause untold trauma to many.

If you’ve been in a narcissistic relationship for some time you will probably have a great deal of trepidation, remembering just how horrible the narcissist made Christmas for you last year. Or maybe you haven’t experienced a painful narcissistic Christmas yet, and this may be one where you will need to be prepared.

It can be so awful to experience all the ways that narcissists act out when Christmas threatens to upstage them, and there are a few specific things which narcissists do which are Universal, to try to bring every else’s good Christmas cheer down.

The 4 Steps to Opening Your Heart After Narcissistic Abuse

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
35
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
35
  I know you may be struggling to keep your heart open to love again after narcissistic abuse, and it’s totally understandable, because there is nothing quite like the devastation that this level of abuse inflicts on our heart … And it’s natural for our mind and body to try and protect us. However, you may feel frustrated because you would like to connect with others and fearlessly build new relationships, and even possibly fall in love again. Maybe, because your heart has been hurt so much, you couldn't possibly contemplate purposeful dating, even though there have been no love opportunities enter your life. (more…)

 

I know you may be struggling to keep your heart open to love again after narcissistic abuse, and it’s totally understandable, because there is nothing quite like the devastation that this level of abuse inflicts on our heart …

And it’s natural for our mind and body to try and protect us.

However, you may feel frustrated because you would like to connect with others and fearlessly build new relationships, and even possibly fall in love again.

Maybe, because your heart has been hurt so much, you couldn’t possibly contemplate purposeful dating, even though there have been no love opportunities enter your life.

Why Narcissists Prey On Intelligent People

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
49
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
49
  Have you ever wondered how you can be capable in so many areas, yet for some reason narcissists are able to hook and deceive you? Have you ever berated yourself for not being able to see it coming? If you’re anything like me I used to constantly tell myself “I know this person is tearing me to shreds, I know I need to go … and I’m smart, I know everything about who they are and what they are doing but why can’t I leave?” The truth is you’re not alone … this is the plight of intelligent people regularly. (more…)

 

Have you ever wondered how you can be capable in so many areas, yet for some reason narcissists are able to hook and deceive you?

Have you ever berated yourself for not being able to see it coming?

If you’re anything like me I used to constantly tell myself “I know this person is tearing me to shreds, I know I need to go … and I’m smart, I know everything about who they are and what they are doing but why can’t I leave?”

The truth is you’re not alone … this is the plight of intelligent people regularly.

Financial Abuse – Rebuilding Your Life After Narcissism

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
32
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
32
  Sadly, narcissistic abuse doesn’t only come with psychological, emotional and spiritual torment. One of the most devastating things is the almost inevitable financial abuse.  Financial abuse is one of the most widespread devastations in this community – so many people are stripped of the resources they have worked hard all their life for. If you are going through it right now, please know you are certainly not alone. Today’s Thriver TV episode is all about how why we fall into financial dependencies and traps with narcissists – and how you can heal from this, let go of the shame and restart your life, regardless of your age or current situation. (more…)

 

Sadly, narcissistic abuse doesn’t only come with psychological, emotional and spiritual torment. One of the most devastating things is the almost inevitable financial abuse. 

Financial abuse is one of the most widespread devastations in this community – so many people are stripped of the resources they have worked hard all their life for.

If you are going through it right now, please know you are certainly not alone.

Today’s Thriver TV episode is all about how why we fall into financial dependencies and traps with narcissists – and how you can heal from this, let go of the shame and restart your life, regardless of your age or current situation.

Why People Attract Narcissists

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
40
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
40
  It's a sad truth, that if we've been hooked by a narcissist in the past, it's very likely that we'll have encounters with more in the future. You may have had the experience of seeing narcissists 'everywhere' and feel like a small fish in a sea of sharks every time you step foot out into the world. If you are anything like I was, you might be incredibly sick of continually attracting toxic people into your life and just wish that you could finally connect with healthy, authentic and supportive people instead. How do we do this? (more…)

 

It’s a sad truth, that if we’ve been hooked by a narcissist in the past, it’s very likely that we’ll have encounters with more in the future.

You may have had the experience of seeing narcissists ‘everywhere’ and feel like a small fish in a sea of sharks every time you step foot out into the world.

If you are anything like I was, you might be incredibly sick of continually attracting toxic people into your life and just wish that you could finally connect with healthy, authentic and supportive people instead.

How do we do this?

The Narcissist’s Silent Treatment – What To Do When You Are Treated Like You Don’t Exist

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
86
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
86
  Narcissistic silent treatment is something that virtually every narcissist delivers skilfully. Ironically it’s the horrible blow that they themselves are terrified of - being rendered invalid, invisible and totally redundant. We all know what it is to ignore or be ignored – we may have snubbed someone at sometime in our life, or we may have been given the “cold shoulder” ourselves. We all clearly know silent treatment means this: “I disapprove of you or something you’ve done”. (more…)

 

Narcissistic silent treatment is something that virtually every narcissist delivers skilfully. Ironically it’s the horrible blow that they themselves are terrified of – being rendered invalid, invisible and totally redundant. We all know what it is to ignore or be ignored – we may have snubbed someone at sometime in our life, or we may have been given the “cold shoulder” ourselves. We all clearly know silent treatment means this: “I disapprove of you or something you’ve done”.

How To Use The Holiday Period To Heal In The Most Spectacular Way

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
44
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
44
  First off, I want to wish all of our lovely American Thriver Family a wonderful Thanksgiving this week! Because we are heading into the holiday season, I really wanted to do this Thriver TV episode to help you stay safe and maintain your peace this Christmas ... And also to explain how you can use this time to heal in the most spectacular way. If you are dreading holiday time, my heart goes out to you. You may still be suffering the trauma of what happened to you, or be in terrible battles with the narcissist over custody and property. (more…)

 

First off, I want to wish all of our lovely American Thriver Family a wonderful Thanksgiving this week!

Because we are heading into the holiday season, I really wanted to do this Thriver TV episode to help you stay safe and maintain your peace this Christmas …

And also to explain how you can use this time to heal in the most spectacular way.

If you are dreading holiday time, my heart goes out to you. You may still be suffering the trauma of what happened to you, or be in terrible battles with the narcissist over custody and property.

How Narcissistic Abuse Taught Me To Be A Source To Myself

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
55
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
55
  I talk in the Community, a lot, about how important it is to become a source to ourselves, so that we can stop handing power over to narcissists – False Selves. And, also, so that we become powerful creators of our own lives, without dependence on anyone else to provide it for us. And then I realised – I had never done a Thriver TV episode specifically on this! In today's video, I am going to be addressing the four key elements of self: self-love, self-approval, security and survival and how you can identify if you are deficient in some or all of these areas. Personally, before recovering from narcissistic abuse, despite appearing outwardly that I had my life together, I was a complete disaster in all of these areas. (more…)

 

I talk in the Community, a lot, about how important it is to become a source to ourselves, so that we can stop handing power over to narcissists – False Selves. And, also, so that we become powerful creators of our own lives, without dependence on anyone else to provide it for us.

And then I realised – I had never done a Thriver TV episode specifically on this!

In today’s video, I am going to be addressing the four key elements of self: self-love, self-approval, security and survival and how you can identify if you are deficient in some or all of these areas.

Personally, before recovering from narcissistic abuse, despite appearing outwardly that I had my life together, I was a complete disaster in all of these areas.

How To Forgive Yourself For Falling For A Narcissist: Love After Abuse Series

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
43
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
43
  One of the hardest things about recovering from narcissistic abuse is that we have to reconcile with the fact that we put so much of our time, love and resources into someone who wasn’t even real. You may be carrying a lot of shame about the fact that your life is now in a far worse state, as a result of the relationship. And worse yet, you may have lost total faith in yourself for making the decisions you did in the past. I want you to understand this, right from the onset, often even more than having to forgive the narcissist – we have to forgive ourselves. And the irony is: unless we forgive ourselves we can’t forgive and be released from any of this, and we can’t forgive the process and what happened to us. (more…)

 

One of the hardest things about recovering from narcissistic abuse is that we have to reconcile with the fact that we put so much of our time, love and resources into someone who wasn’t even real.

You may be carrying a lot of shame about the fact that your life is now in a far worse state, as a result of the relationship.

And worse yet, you may have lost total faith in yourself for making the decisions you did in the past.

I want you to understand this, right from the onset, often even more than having to forgive the narcissist – we have to forgive ourselves. And the irony is: unless we forgive ourselves we can’t forgive and be released from any of this, and we can’t forgive the process and what happened to us.

Pathological Jealousy And Narcissism – Why You Can Never Earn Their Trust

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
30
Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans
30
  If you have ever experienced the pathological jealousy of a narcissist, you know it goes a long way beyond being merely insecure. In today’s Thriver TV episode, I explain to you the difference between the narcissist’s levels of pathological jealousy and what we would term as “normal” levels of jealousy, and what the steps are to recognising it. We also go through how narcissists play out pathological envy ... and I'm going to explain to you how I released myself and healed from the pattern of jealous and controlling partners. (more…)

 

If you have ever experienced the pathological jealousy of a narcissist, you know it goes a long way beyond being merely insecure.

In today’s Thriver TV episode, I explain to you the difference between the narcissist’s levels of pathological jealousy and what we would term as “normal” levels of jealousy, and what the steps are to recognising it.

We also go through how narcissists play out pathological envy … and I’m going to explain to you how I released myself and healed from the pattern of jealous and controlling partners.