Melanie Tonia Evans

Welcome to the Narcissism and Relationships Blog

The purpose of this blog is to grant illumination, empowerment and resources for individuals wishing to change painful love patterns, heal themselves and experience real love.

Here you will discover profound truths about yourself that will put you in the driver's seat to create a life of happiness, freedom and joy.

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A Miracle Story About How Premi Gained Full Custody Of Her Children – Thriver Story #29

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans   Today’s Thriver Show is about Prima, a lady who went through a highly abusive narcissistic marriage that had her eventually fleeing, fearful for her life. He had threatened that if she ever left him he would kill her. Now today Prima has not only recovered herself, her emotions and her life, but she was also recently awarded full legal custody of her two daughters. This occurred despite being initially terrified for her and her daughters that he would charm the courts and no-one would believe her. But one day something completely changed, and what unfolded was nothing short of a miracle. Click the play button ... read more →

Clarifying No Contact – The Common Pitfalls That Keep Us Hooked

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  No Contact is probably the biggest buzz word in narcissistic abuse recovery, and that’s really no surprise because it’s widely acknowledged that No Contact from a narcissist is vital in order to recover from one. Anyone that has experienced narcissistic abuse knows the feelings like black ink and ice running through your veins when enmeshed with a narcissist. If you don’t achieve No Contact it is like being continually poisoned whilst trying to detox from the poison that is making you so sick. It’s very, very difficult to get well when you are constantly tied up in the battle of trying to survive ... read more →

How We Become Better Parents As We Heal

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  The reason I really wanted to explore this topic in an article is because I am very passionate about our children and future generations. I so believe the shift in consciousness on our planet needs to start with us, as the caretakers of our children and their future children’s emotional evolution. So many parents try to fix and help their children deal with narcissistic abuse, but don’t realise that operating from a tormented, agonised emotional state truly makes matters worse. It grants the narcissist more bullets to shoot you with and incites them to use your children as weapons of war. Making ... read more →

What To Do When Your Family and Friends Don’t Support You

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  There are many things that are excruciatingly difficult when suffering from narcissistic abuse. One of them commonly being that people close to you seem to have no understanding of the soul rape that you are going through. Often, adding insult to injury, people close to you might believe that you are the person who is disturbed and not well, and even making stuff up … Because the accusations you make seem so far away from the “perfect” model person that the narcissist portrays to everyone else. It has been said before – and it is very true – that narcissists have the ability to ... read more →

Why Won’t The Narcissist Leave Me Alone?

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  This is a great question that I have wanted to address in a blog article for a while. It’s a question which is asked a lot. It’s also a question that’s very important to understand the answer to. Most people think that narcissists are relentless, and they won’t let up, and that there is no way to get rid of people who keep harassing, hoovering, wanting to rip your life to shreds and trying to suck you back in time and time again. And it can seem unreal that even after years, and even after moving on with new people, that narcissists will ... read more →

The First Ever NARP Couple! [Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse #28 Mike And Catsby]

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  I don’t know the last time I was this excited to bring you an interview … A few months ago, it came to my attention that we had our first ever public NARP couple! The whole MTE team was over the moon and we all wanted to share their story with the community. Now today is the day … This interview between Mike and Catsby was not only incredibly insightful, but it truly made my heart sing … And when I listened back to it, I even shed a few tears! Mike and Catsby are not only in a relationship – they are in a connected, expansive relationship which ... read more →

When Is It Safe To Date After Narcissistic Abuse? Part 2

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  This is Part Two of this series, and I really hope Part One helped you understand why it is so much healthier to not rush into dating after suffering an abusive relationship – ensuring that we create a healthy relationship with ourselves first. Part One, fundamentally was about self-partnering and mating our own soul, so that we could show up healthily as “love” within the creation of another relationship, rather than attempting to get “love” by seeking another person to grant us ourselves. Many people have hidden this under the guise of “but I was / am so loving” … and that was discussed ... read more →

When Is It Safe To Date After Narcissistic Abuse? Part 1

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  I get asked this soooo often, and I mean so often! This is what people ask … “Is it time to date yet … because I’m struggling with being attracted to decent men … Why is that?” Or … “I’m comparing everyone to the narc … no-one lights me up like he / she did. Why is this? I’m dating but it’s so painful …. it just makes me miss the narcissist more.” Or  … “Every person I meet I find myself psycho-analysing them – trying to work out whether they are a narcissist or not. Is this the right thing to do?” This is ... read more →

Interview with Nicolle Edward – Founder of Rize Up Australia

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  This week I did an interview with Nicolle Edward, the CEO and Founder of Rize Up Australia. Rize Up is a community driven organisation dedicated to educating, empowering and ending domestic and family violence. We all know that domestic and intimate partner violence sadly is epidemic. Recently in Australia there was a shocking week with two women murdered in broad daylight, and also a child and a grandparent murdered. These issues are all over the world, and Rize Up is taking a stand by rallying community resources to assist women who need to flee, in order to be safe and re-start their lives. During ... read more →

Is It Possible To Truly Love A Narcissist?

Written by Melanie Tonia Evans
  Being in love with narcissist is one of the most painful things. It starts off with huge highs because there’s usually something that is really attractive. It could be the spirited conversations you have, electric incredible sex, or maybe it’s the way you feel that finally you’ve met someone who “gets you” so completely on so many levels. And often it feels “different” … in that there is much more of a connection than what you experienced with other people. And it feels really exciting. And even intoxicating. Narcissists seem to have this bright spark to them, which often translates as a carefree, liberated “screw you” ... read more →