You may or may not know what Cognitive Dissonance really is.
It is the confusion of having justifications for staying bonded to somebody who is hurting us.
In other words, emotionally it is feeling horrific to stay, yet you find that you are under the spell of the narcissist no matter how badly he or she is treating you.
Many people don’t understand the real truth about why Cognitive Dissonance takes place, or the real reasons for it.
That’s what today’s Thriver TV episode is all about, explaining to you exactly why you are stuck in Cognitive Dissonance, and how to break free from it forever.
Video Transcript
Trauma bonding is a narcissistic abuse phenomenon. It makes it incredibly difficult to break away from somebody who is hurting us.
Logically this doesn’t make sense. Why would we stay with somebody who is really bad for us and who is ripping our life and soul apart?
How have we been able to reconcile and justify what is happening to us, in order to stay?
The reason that we do this is because we are suffering from Cognitive Dissonance.
And today I can explain to you what that REALLY means in this Thriver TV episode.
But before we get into the truth about why we stay attached, I’d like to thank each and every one of you for subscribing to my channel and for supporting the Thriver Mission.
And, if you agree with my philosophies, and haven’t yet subscribed, I’d love you to please do so, and please also pass my videos on to those in need.
Okay, so now let’s do a deep dive into what Cognitive Dissonance really is.
What is Cognitive Dissonance?
Cognitive Dissonance means we are experiencing two opposing ideas that are creating confusion.
A simple example of this would be the thoughts of, “I want to stay home and relax, but I’d really like to meet up with friends tonight”.
In the case of narcissistic abuse, an example of Cognitive Dissonant thoughts could go like this, “He/she is so abusive. I need to leave to save myself” with “He/she is only behaving like this because of a horrible childhood. I should stay and fix this”.
The Cognitive Dissonance creates the excuses for not pulling away and taking care of ourselves.
Other forms of Cognitive Dissonance can be “reasons” such as, “I know this relationship is meant to be, and I am going to stay and see it through” or worse still, “He really is a great guy, it’s me with all the problems, and I know I make him act like this” or “If I love him enough, I know I can heal him” or “I’m the only person that truly understands her. I can’t leave her, it’s my duty to stay and love her with everything I have”.
We decide to make our choices aligned with these reasons, even though our Inner Being is screaming “Wrong Town! I am breaking down!”
Why do we do this?
Why do we go with a version of truth in our head rather than listen to our emotions which are the Soul Truth of our entire life?
Because we are trauma bonded.
What does that mean?
Let’s investigate.
The Real Truth About Trauma Bonding
I have written a great deal about trauma bonding in the past, and there are so many ways that the narcissist behaves, which trigger us into our unhealed histories and insecurities and hook us into trying to resolve them with the person who is hurting us.
You can read more about trauma bonding here (Trauma Bonding – Is It Love Or Something Else).
Yet, when we get deeply underneath all of this, we understand the bottom line of what is really going on. It’s to do with our subconscious belief systems in relation to any topic in our life. These are the driving force of our life that hooks us up with the people, situations and events that exactly match those beliefs.
If our Inner Identity holds the belief, as a result of a traumatic past, generational wounds or painful and devastating childhoods and future adult relationships, of “Love hurts” or “The people who love me leave me/replace me/invalidate me/annihilate me” (and the list goes on and on) then this is what we continue to experience in our life.
Narcissists are famous for delivering this.
And of course, understandably, we have also formed the Inner Identity beliefs of, “I am not worth loving”, “There must be something wrong with me”, “I am incapable of getting love or my life right”. So naturally, we continue going through this over and over again.
Neuroscientists now know that our subconscious controls 40 billion bits of information per second throughout our entire systems, whereas our logical mind only controls 40 bits per second.
What do you think is pulling the strings of your life? Your almighty subconscious or your conscious thoughts?
Okay, so at this point, you may be wondering what all of this has to do with trauma bonding and Cognitive Dissonance?
Well, everything!
Your mind will come up with all the excuses and justifications to create the validity of the traumatic program.
The brain, with its limited power, defaults to agree with the powerhouse of the already existing subconscious programs.
As revolutionary neuroscientist, Dr. Joe Dispenza says, “The brain follows the body always”.
How Do You Escape Trauma Bonding and Cognitive Dissonance?
I will share with you how I achieved this.
I completely embraced that the Inner Belief systems I had in relation to love and relationships were filled with pain. All of my life I had felt unloved, unlovable and unworthy of love.
And of course, I’d been attempting to cover this up. I’d been trying to be worthy of love with all my might, by trying to be what I needed to be for others to love me.
Additionally, I realised that I had been making the excuses and justifications to stay with people who hurt me, and I tried to change and fix them, rather than let go and heal myself.
To rectify this, once and for all, I knew my life going forward had to be an inside job.
It was all between me and me. Focusing on anybody else was not going to give me my emancipation from this.
Most people, before understanding the deeper truths, when attempting to heal from Cognitive Dissonance try to address the problem at a level that it doesn’t exist.
They try to do it logically. The problem exists in the subconscious, not in the cognitive mind.
The issue is not the thoughts that are the “reasons” you are staying attached. These thoughts are a symptom of what is going on in the subconscious programs. Unless the subconscious programs are addressed, the thoughts will keep coming back, because the brain is following the body.
It doesn’t matter how much we talk, research and even get cognitive therapy, we may be able to hold healthier decisions for a short amount of time, yet the powerhouse of the 40 billion bits per second will have its way.
A deep shift has to happen on the inside of you, within your Inner Identity, and then your brain will follow.
Are you having the epiphany yet about why you are coming up with reasons and justifications for staying attached, or breaking no contact, or trying to go in and get accountability even though you know you can’t? Despite knowing how much extra pain it brings every time you do it?
Is it becoming clear to you what is really going on deep within you beneath the level of your conscious understanding?
If you really do get it now, I want you to stop this video and write below, “Bingo! I get it!”
That’s essential if you are going to break free from this.
You can’t know the following that I’m about to share with you, until you get to the other side of this, but I promise you it is true.
Organically, without these traumas, you are a whole, self-generative, self-honouring person who would no sooner be connected to painful and traumatic love, than a health-conscious person would eat a greasy hamburger.
I hope that this has truly helped.
Okay, so if you have had enough of the pain, and you know it’s your time to become healthy on the inside, then that’s precisely the healing work I provide.
All you need to do to get started is click this link.
And, if you enjoyed this video please give it a like, and share with people who you know are stuck in justifications that are keeping them bonded with people who are hurting them.
And, as always, I am so looking forward to answering your comments and questions below.
Bingo I get it
Bingo I get it
Awesome Luisa,
Bless!
Mel 🙏💕💛
That’s wonderful Gloria!
Mel 🙏💕💛
I am a male, going through an experience with someone i thought I loved. I feed into a toxic relationship even though in the end it turns out they admitted to using me and that I deserve better. Yet they continue to do things to keep me hooked and stay around. She wants to maintain a friendship and I’m sure I have already been replaced. But it doesnt help that I am hurt and broken after all the time I spent OF myself to this person. Why can’t I break free of this? Why do I allow myself to let this continue? I know I deserve better but I don’t want to give up on someone I love. I’m not a victim, I keep feeding into it. I keep blaming myself and the fact that I’m insecure and my flaws are why I deserve this. I’m drained and battered and need help. It’s not as easy as cutting this person out. I’ve isolated myself and am alone, I don’t allow anyone else in and I forgot how to have fun and enjoy myself. I’m a full-time single dad of two beautiful girls who are getting the brunt of it. I just want to live a normal life where I love myself and can have a normal relationship.
I’m married to a narcissist I do know this but honestly the “punishment” will literally go on for days weeks months if I allowed it. I literally can’t take it. Valentine’s Day I’m given a card that says how lucky he is for me bringing all this love to this family etc and so on then 2 days later over something so dumb he abuses me but doesn’t even know of the physical abuse because ever since then he hasn’t slept in our bed and hasn’t uttered a word to me. I could never return home and I don’t think he would bat an eye. How can this be??????
Hi R,
Please know that what you are going through is the usual bamboozled feelings we experience after narcissistic abuse.
Please come into my free webinar http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/freewebinar so that you can get a deeper understanding of what is really going on within you, as well as the solution to it.
I hope this helps
Mel 🙏💕💛
“I want to have a normal life where I love myself”.
Do that!
The pain you feel going cold turkey is a chemical and vagus nerve response. Our ‘monkey brain’ is conditioned from cave man days to be attached, feel connection. The withdrawal you feel is grief; our minds actually produce chemicals that miss this person more when we cut them from our life.
If you read back your message, your truth is within it:
“I have isolated myself” – this is shame. Shame tells us lies. Now you know, do the opposite. Join group activities
“My girls are getting the brunt of this” You are projecting your trauma and lack of self worth and self love on to them. You are repeating the cycle of trauma into them. Do you want that? Yes? Carry on. No? Stop! Get help. Psychotherapy. Energy healing like Reiki will shift deep blocks and trauma.
“I am insecure” – so love yourself! Turn the focus inside. As yourself ‘what do I want?’ ‘What do I enjoy doing?’ ‘What have I always wanted?’ ‘What’s on my bucket list?’ Write it down. Now go do those things.
“I forgot how to have fun” – no you didn’t. You’re just punishing yourself as this does allow you to be the victim (unconsciously). Now you know this. Go have fun! It feels uncomfortable at first but this is the reprogramming part. The ‘unlearning’
You need to know that THE ONE, is One’s Self. It’s you! You are the creator of your life. Decide the life you want to live then go make yourself do it!
Be aware the sub conscious and ego work together to repeat continuous patterns of old behaviour. When you start to make conscious choices to change behaviour It’ll feel uncomfortable as hell. Like dying a million deaths of yourself. Lots of stories and mind chatter comes up. You have to feel into those emotions. Breathe into them. Do mediation and sit in the silence of your own mind
If that feels too intense, use something guided like Paul McKenna hypnosis that are on YouTube…the mind can be reprogrammed by repeated daily behaviour in 6 weeks. Try listening daily for that time. See how things shift
Know that all these strong emotions, they will pass. On the other side is love. Love for yourself. This is self love and self worth
Good luck x
..isolating myself by attempting to cope with the emotional abuse, I know well… (meanwhile i am to our chronically ill to go outside and meet people or visit museums and exhibitions. But creating or recreating an „outside“ is essential, in order not to completly loose the measure and feeling for oneself in normal, relaxed exchanges. Doing a so called „relational based psychoanalysis“ did help me to regain a feeling for myself and recover at least partly from early attachment traumas, which made me vulnerable and a perfect supplier for any narc. Your partner maybe a borderliner, or so, and need help her or himself. But you are not a therapist… Go out and slowly recover your outside world and being – and be it only 1-2x/weeks a meal or walk with an old friend, or reactivating a nice old hobbx, making you laugh and smile… find this quality also in your 2 Girls, and become familiar again with living a life where trust doesn’t mean to bealsays alert to (not) pick up the emotional beatings. Wishing you all the best!!! It’s real work, don’t forget. But it remains being alive and being safe can move closer to each other again. If there is real love on board, your partner may consider therapy for herself….to help each of you.
I’ve just started psychotherapy. The Therapist wants me to go for EMDR treatments to reach deep into childhood traumas which set me up for repeated narcissistic relationships!
AND YET, He’s still in my life! Still illogically permitting his lies, false promises and subtle abuse. I’m smarter than he is. But that doesn’t help me help myself!
Get help!
I am going through the exact same thing – this is a result of them getting in your head you need to find yourself and kick out the narcs voice and thoughts…these people are evil and bring no good to you or this world
Look after yourself and importantly your girls they need you back as a healthy figure -I promise you once you break the narcs spell you will see a different and healthy future away from mind games and abuse….I wish you well and always look after number 1….these people don’t deserve our live they are sick.
Bingo I get it
So true Melanie. I tried hard to fix him so I could get the love I needed.
Learning to love myself now, the program helps beyond measure
That’s awesome Robyne,
I’m so pleased you are breaking through and that NARP http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp is helping so much.
Love and blessings
Mel 🙏💕💛
“ Our bodies know they belong to Life , to Spirit
It’s our minds that make our lives so homeless”
( John O Donahue, Irish Poet/ Author of Anam Cara..
and this which always makes me think of you dear Mel :
May you be blessed with a wise and compassionate guide
Who can accompany you through the fear and grief
Until your heart has wept its way to your true self.
As your tears fall over that wounded place,
May they wash away your hurt and free your heart.
May your forgiveness still the hunger of the wound
So that for the first time you can walk away from that place,
Reunited with your banished heart, now healed and freed,
And feel the clear, free air bless your new face.”
― John O’Donohue,
Such beautiful words Val,
Thank you so much for sharing darling Lady.
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo I get it !! In my heart and head I kept telling my self, in time, things will get better. In time, we wont be going through all of this. In time, she will get help and things will be normal. The heart has a way of pulling your through and making you not see what’s really there in front of you. I miss her. I love her. Why can’t she just get help so we can be together.
Hi PG,
I know how painful it is, but please know your destiny was never about her healing. It was about you being delivered home to healing yourself.
That is the gift if you take that will not just cease all pain, but also deliver you into the most spectacular life and love that you could imagine.
So much more superior to what you ever experienced with her.
Do you accept the gift?
Much love to you
Mel 🙏💕💛
I have bought your $75 set, but I can’t locate them! Can you help me.
Hi Rebecca,
Yes.. if you email [email protected] one of my lovely staff will be able to help you.
Mel 🙏💕💛
Right, the very first time you got away from your narcissist – how did it happen? It was never explained in the book.
Hi Veil,
When I had my profound breakdown, that was the first time that I was able to go completely no contact, and never take or initiate contact with him again.
I talk about that time in my book.
That’s how I finally got away.
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo- I get it!!! Thank you, Melanie. I thought if I stayed long enough for him to get over this “transition” or that “difficult job” he would go back to being that nice guy I married again. I finally realized, there is ALWAYS an excuse to continue that cycle of abuse with npd. (And there is no nice guy!)
Hi Tammy,
That’s great hun!
Much love to you
Mel 🙏💕💛
Wow! This is everything I do always!
Bing-I get it. But that means I get the sense of it–not how to get in and overhaul my inner self.
Hi Paula,
Yes there is a big difference between concept and shifting into embodiment.
Are you working with NARP http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp ?
It is the way to heal this.
Much love to you
Mel 🙏💕💛
everything that I have read so far or watched thru video is making sense.
I have a question tho, my x wife was abusive and almost succeeded in destroying me. But she did it in a way that completely flipped me upside down.
She actually flipped the script on me and claims I am the abusive narcissist. She was so convincing that I actually believed her and was extremely concerned that I was abusing her instead. I would apologize for things that she did, being convinced it was my fault she said or did what she did. She would use psychology terms on me, and tell me I was the one who was doing these things. Like she would tell me I was gaslighting her, or that I am a narcissist. Those are just the everyday occurrences she would use on me.
My question is how do recover from this type of abuse?
Hi Sharon Matern,
How do you recover from that type of abuse? Like all of us who have recovered or are well on the way to being recovered it’s simple… you do the Inner Work!
Please note I said simple and NOT easy because there’s nothing easy about dredging up your past CRAP and laying it bare for your eyes to finally see and your subconscious to accept, at times it’s as soul destroying as the actual abuse but when you get over the hump and start the downhill run things start to get clearer and you start to feel just a little worthy of yourself and slowly that little gain is like a snowball, it gets bigger and bigger and one day you wake up and you’ve found you and really start to live the life of loving yourself… Magic!
They all go on with this sort of soul crushing lying, manipulative behaviour because they never do anything wrong and indeed they’re Entitled to use and abuse you and then discard you when you no longer suit their needs only to pick you up if they lose their other supply person and need you to fill the hole while they look for a new victim.
So to recover you will have to go inside and drag out those horrible memories kicking and screaming and expose them in all their naked glory to the outside world so you become clean inside from all that “stuff” you’ve carried around since you were a kid and be the best you that you can be with and love and friendship for yourself and life will really begin for you.
Bye for now and take care and good luck finding yourself, you’re in their if you look~~~~
Wait! Wait! I can’t eat greasy burgers? First cigarettes now this. Oh Mel, healthy healing sounds pretty good. Thank you.
Hilarious Kathy,
Well maybe just occasionally!
Congratulations on letting go of cigarettes, that such a huge accomplishment!
Much love to you
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo I get it
I love that Terri,
Bless!
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo with bells…I get it, thank you for the clarity and your authenticity once again Mel.
Ha ha beautiful Lulah!
Bless you and much Love.
Please know how welcome you are
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo, I get it, your Right it was like being under a spell with the narcissist while at the same time my mind is going, how can I escape this, and the spell seemed stronger, but have gone no Contact for 14 Months and done the NARP Programme and got divorced yesterday and feel So Free, and life is Good 🙂
Hi Cole,
that’s so wonderful that you have got your divorce through, and that NARP http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp has helped you heal so much.
I’m so happy for you, and many continue blessings to you Col
Mel 🙏💕💛
“Bingo! I get it!”
Awesome Rebecca!
Many blessings to you
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo. I get it. I am being financially abused by a family member and my Ex too. If I bring up the topic and try to present a logical solution to them they simply either get up and walk away or a few days later are trying to squeeze money out of me again and don’t even acknowledge the conversation we just had! I know if I don’t go along with their wishes I will forever sever the relationships and also suffer retaliation. But at the same time I want them to live with the consequences they themselves created for their lives. Yes it is emotionally painful to choose my own well being in this circumstance. What continues to happen to me financially is just devastating. There seems to be no end.
Hi No Name,
It is so difficult to deal with narcissists, because they simply don’t cooperate.
The only thing that they do understand is boundaries and you taking your power back.
Yes they will retaliate, but at least there will be an end to this. If you try to tread water with them and continue on and try to get some sensibility, they will only continue to bleed you dry.
I’d love you to connect to my free healing resources, being my 16-day course, which I know can help you get some clarity and power. http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/free course
I hope that this can help you
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo on steroids!!
Love it Kerry!
Go you!
Mel 🙏💕💛
This is to R, and I hope he gets to read it:
All the responses you have had so far are true.
They may well seem worded as ‘too easy’ or ‘simplistic’, to match the sense of it feeling, actually, way too hard, but one thing you say stands out to me so strongly, and that is “I know I am not a victim”. You are SO right, and this is the best thing you can hang on to, along with a commitment, at every point you possibly can, to love yourself.
You have made choices. They may have been ones that have been unhealthy, but they were a choice, the best you could make at that time. That will always be the case – that you are doing your best – so be kind to yourself as you move forward, because then you will feel the love you give yourself, and your choices will align increasingly healthily.
I can’t recommend NARP enough: life saving, soul evolving, and a gift to future generations as we live out our truth of being healed and whole.
Hope these comments help in some way,
Every blessing for your healing,
Stephanie
Bingo! I’ve got!
Awesome Joanne,
bless!
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo I get it. My healing has become stalled due to a family death. I’m now ready to put the work in and finish my healing. Thank you Melanie from the bottom of my heart. This world is a far far better place with you in it Melanie , helping us all to heal. Love Amanda x
Hi Amanda,
that’s so great that you’ve got it!
Thank you for your beautiful words and sending you love and healing
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo, I got it!
Brilliant Kristan,
bless!!
Mel 🙏💕💛
That the great Kristan,
Bless!
Much Love
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo – I get it
My problem is with my 36 yr old son. He feels entitled to live here, all the while blaming me for many things that have gone wrong in his life .He is a classic narcissist, not caring if he is rude and demanding to me. I took him in after his x-girlfriend battered him. Twice… he does have mental health issues which makes his understanding of kindness to me even more difficult. I need to put him out, even though he has no car, job, or place to go. My health is going downhill FAST. i have moved away twice without him knowing where I lived, then comes the call that he has been batteted, and I go get him. Now I want out with no contact again ever, since he is narcissist, and a rude man. My situation is not one of trying to help anymore.
Yes I’ve had enough but I’m cornered. I can’t pack up my animals I give sanctuary to. I’ve no sustainable indepentant income. I have a dozen large to small animals I tend to all day. I’m also 65. 19 yrs with the source of hell who is 75! He now has heart failure, but it’s his income. I have to find ways to live and thrive in the enemies camp. No other recourse. Talk about becoming bullet proof! Thanks to encouragement and help from your wisdom I don’t feel so secluded. (I actually live quite secluded in the forest) and am coming to terms with my situation.
Oh Lea,
I so understand your dedication and devotion to your animals, and also the position that you’re in.
Please feel my love and support as well as the beautiful energy of this community, to help you in your situation.
Mel 🙏💕💛
Bingo, I get it!
Best wishes, Bee
BINGO – I really do get it!
I’ve had this email sitting in my inbox for a few days, waiting for a good time to read it. Well wow, it is so spot on for what I needed to hear right now!
You see, I left my narc of 18 years just over 14 months ago, and I have been doing so much work on myself, and making great progress, especially using the NARP program.
My ex and I still own joint property, a beautiful 3 acre piece of land we were building our dream home on, except the dream turned into a nightmare and I had to leave. He still lives in the property and finally is agreeing to sell, probably because I’ve got a great lawyer.
I still had a few possessions left that I wanted, so after him complaining about all the stuff left in the house, and saying he was going to throw it all out, I negotiated with him to let me come to the property for a few days, help him with sorting stuff out, and allowing me to get my stuff. As long as he wasn’t there. He agreed to go away for a few days, so last week, with my good friend in tow, I went to my old house and did what I’d agreed to do. Sorted stuff, gave stuff to charity, got my stuff. I thought I’d be strong enough to handle this, that it would be good for me to say goodbye to my old dream home and let it all go.
Well, was I wrong!
I had a huge emotional meltdown on the second day, and basically decided I didn’t want to, or couldn’t leave, wanted to stay there, couldn’t bear to walk away. I started bargaining with myself, making excuses for him, making plans to move back. I knew I was crazy even thinking this way, but I didn’t care. I wanted back in, and nothing was going to stop me. I also felt I was spiralling down into a hole but couldn’t stop myself and just didn’t know what was happening.
How could I have gone backwards so quickly, after all the work I’d done to move forward?!
Well, this article explains it. I knew I’d reopened my trauma bonds, but now I truly understand what Cognitive Dissonance is.
And now I understand it, I can truly heal it.
Thank you again, Melanie, for your amazing insights and information on how to deal with these issues. I am a NARP member, so I’ll will be heading to that course to do some modules for sure!
Can you advise me which ones would be the best to do?
Many thanks, again, for your wisdom 🙏🏽❤️🙏🏽❤️🙏🏽
Hi Sharon,
that’s awesome that you get it!
Sharon, what you went through is so normal, sweetheart, please don’t be hard on yourself. I totally understand how and why you would have had a meltdown.
Hun,what you need to do now is use either module one or the source healing and resolution module to reach in and find exactly what is triggered, load it up, release it and replace it. And I promise you that not only will you be free of these terrible feelings that are happening right now, but you will also go up to the next and highest level of your solidness and empowerment.
I hope that this helps, and please know that if you are a gold NARP member, at any time you can come into the NARP members forum http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp which is your 24/7 support network at any time that you need help.
So much love to you and you have got this Sharon!
Mel 🙏💕💛
I know exactly what the dissonance is and it’s often experienced as psychological stress when we participate in an action that goes against our values or beliefs.
It creates a double-bind which is a dilemma in communication. So if we receive two or more conflicting messages with one negating the other, we experience emotional distress. Example is when we know life is one way, then something so cruelly counter to our understanding happens so we might feel shocked or think something is evil. Or it can be like believing your spouse and that your relationship is good, then finding out something about them that contradicts what they have you believe. Cognitive dissonance is how gaslighting can make you feel crazy. It is something we can experience as a psychological contradiction where we then start to overthink or feel confused. Or it can be experienced as emotional and spiritual violations if you find yourself acting or participating in something that goes against your preference, truth, better judgment or conscience.
Narcs create these complicated issues in us and others and it makes us all very unwell. This clusterf$?! nonsense takes a toll on the adrenals, immune and nervous system and can physically erode you until you have serious health problems. These are fascist tactics meant to imprison and torture you so they can feel awesome and free at the expense of your health and sanity. Narcs should be tried for attempted murder because the extreme mental, emotional and ambient physical abuse that we often can’t name or figure out, that is meant to cruelly disturb reality, can literally kill you by causing damaging health problems.
So how about it?? Anyone know any good legal resources to help us create legislation around this???
I agree suing a man who emotionally abused me should legal as sexual abuse. They Are relentless prosecutors, evil 👿! Thankful to be free but struggling with feelings I betrayed my standards. Healing is happening🌺
Its a very big Bingooooo!🙏
Strange thing is I new already but now it has hit me hahaha great. Because of yesterday wrong experience. Moving on with NARP
Things and pings come in the wright time at the wright place
The narcissist nearly three decades after breaking up with them, got in touch with some relatives to find out about my personal business whilst professing how reformed they are, owned a business and went to church blah blah something rather. Of course I had moved on, doing really well and blamo! they pulled some super nice yet super crazy criminal stuff to try to destroy my current relationship and career. They felt strongly apparently, that my sex life was harming the earth?!😆🥴 and that I was just “whipped” by my current allegedly narcissistic girlfriend and needed to be freed to hook up with them to lead a moral life. Right. Total nonsense and as usual, not splendidly surprising.