Melanie Tonia Evans

What To Do When You Lose All Hope To Recover

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans Permalink 2
38
Written By   Melanie Tonia Evans

 

When we are broken, devastated and crawling through our life second to second and looking at the rubble of what used to be our life smashed to pieces on the ground, it may seem hopeless and helpless.

It is really common for us Thrivers to experience people in the NARP Community starting their inner healing journey who admit they feel like it’s too late, they are too old, they have lost too much or they are too broken to heal.

I promise you once upon a time I felt like I was never going to heal … and I can’t tell you how many people have told me the same things over the years – and many of these people I know now as incredible glowing Thrivers.

During this video we take a deep dive into why is it that some people heal and Thrive, whereas others don’t.

Is it do with the level of trauma they sustained?

Yet, how can this be the factor when there are people who have suffered unthinkable damage and trauma who have come back from that? These are people who have been devastated by narcissistic abuse mentally, emotionally, physically, financially and spiritually.

Yet in the Thriver Model, despite how broken and devastated their Inner Beings and their lives are they heal … they come back, they reignite and many of them step onto brand new trajectories of love, joy, vibrant health and expressing their personal missions and soul contributions to the world.

So how did these people recover and come back from a totally devastated life?

And how did people recover who had illnesses and conditions that were deemed chronic, incurable and even terminal?

How DO they heal, resurrect their health and make their way back from the brink … to be released into their true lives?

In this episode you will learn HOW the narcissist does not have the power to take away our chances of recovery – no matter how malicious they are and what they did or do to us – and how the Level of Belief is the ONE and only determining factor.

I also provide a VERY POWERFUL mantra in this episode, that by you repeating can start shifting you out of trauma into your New Life – one free of abuse and abuse symptoms.

My heart goes out to you, if you feel like giving up hope, and it my deepest wish that this episode can help you turn it all around.

I’d love to hear from you, in regard to what you felt inside of you – at the Level of Belief – when you repeated the mantra.

Please share with myself and the Community by posting in the comments below, and let’s continue this conversation in order to co-generate and access the breakthrough into True Recovery!

 

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Melanie Tonia Evans is an international narcissistic abuse recovery expert. She is an author, radio host, and founder of Quanta Freedom Healing and The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program. Melanie's healing and teaching methods have liberated thousands of people from the effects of narcissistic abuse world-wide.

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38 Thoughts on What To Do When You Lose All Hope To Recover
  • clarkch5@hotmail.com'
    Resilient
    May 3, 2017

    Another great video Melanie! Thanks for all you do. I love that you consistently reinforce the same message in all your videos and articles. It’s gotten to the point that I know WHAT to do whenever I’m feeling distressed. Track the feeling in the body, release, and replace with light. This has become my “go-to process,” and I know it’s because you’ve reinforced this concept in all of your material (so it’s sticking). Thank you for that.

    By the way, when repeating your mantra, I felt a little lighter. You are so wise and intelligent. We are blessed to have your resources!

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Resilient,

      thank you for your gorgeous comments and I am so pleased you enjoyed this episode and the mantra!

      That is so awesome that you have that simple formula down pat! That truly is IT!

      Many blessings to you Resilient 🙂

      Mel xo

  • vick.i@live.co.uk'
    Vicki
    May 3, 2017

    Dear Melanie,
    When I heard you say this mantra, it totally resonated with the cells in my being. I love hearing it so much as it feels like pure truth. Thank you for this wonderful video, it is so inspiring and uplifting. Especially when I am at the beginning of my healing journey and still have so much work to do. Thank you for your support, it is amazing.
    With love xxxx

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Vicki,

      I am so pleased it resonated with you!

      It’s my pleasure and how wonderful you are clicking into deep truths and Quantum stuff right at the beginning.

      It SO makes healing go in a straight line!

      Mel xo

  • sussex.woman@gmail.com'
    HELENA
    May 3, 2017

    Ouch you have described EXACTLY how I feel right now, after breaking up with a Cover Narc: “broken, devastated and crawling through our life second to second and looking at the rubble of what used to be our life smashed to pieces on the ground”. It DOES “seem hopeless and helpless” and I DO “feel like it’s too late, they are too old” and that I am “too broken to heal”. Six months on and I still sob every day. I am 59 in a few weeks. He took away the years I could have spent building up a relationship that would continue into old age. Instead I am a spinster again and nearly 60!

    • My_bba@yahoo.com'
      Hélène
      May 3, 2017

      Oh dear, dear sister ((((hug))))
      Pls know u are thot of today, u are lifted up. U are loved.
      U have worth as an older person, as a thrown-away. U are you, so worthy in just being you.
      Pls absorb this from the universe today, from God, from me. From many others. We are all here, with you. U are not alone, dear one. Not alone.

    • valpal@rogers.com'
      Valerie Palmer
      May 3, 2017

      Dear Helena, I am 73 and am only just beginning to understand, after many many years of anxiety and depression. I got back to the orginal abuse with my Mother, who was mentally ill, and am growing towards the LIGHT of awareness, my soul journey. Many call this the SHIFT as earth is in dire strais. I discovered Mel just a couple of months ago and everything she speaks resonates with me. I am on the up and up. Good luck! Sending Love and Light to all who are here! Valerie Canada

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Helena,

      my heart goes out to you …

      Please know Dear Lady we have many Thrivers your age and even more mature – I promise there is a way through this.

      I would love you to listen to this episode, and please consider joining our NARP Community to start healing … We would love to have you and help you achieve this.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S1kL8kvxv3w&list=UUtIVcBdfm2hZGd0V0tEFtxw&index=12

      Mel xo

    • Susanmwyer@gmail.coml'
      Suzzie
      May 4, 2017

      Hi yes my story is the same .. and I’m struggling ..without neil use regular talks and the Naro program I feel like I have no hope every day.. u think I really need to do these modals more and more

    • Susanmwyer@gmail.com'
      Suzzie
      May 4, 2017

      Hi yes my story is the same .. and I’m struggling ..without neil use regular talks and the Naro program I feel like I have no hope every day.. u think I really need to do these modals more and more

  • bev@blanman.co.uk'
    Bev
    May 3, 2017

    Melanie – thank you so much for ALL your great videos and articles. This one in particular has been so helpful, as having left my narcissist, currently homeless, in financial ruin, and with health issues, I find myself crawling through each day simply surviving. I have moments of complete despair. I have felt it is hopeless, that I am too old to start over, and build my life back again – but am slowly getting myself back. I have listened to the episode again, so that I can write down the mantra and carry it with me every day. Thank you for all your work!

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Bev,

      I am so pleased this one spoke to you.

      I promise sweetheart there is a way up and out – no matter your age … to start connecting to your True Life.

      It is all to do with releasing the inner trauma, and that is when our True Life begins.

      Mel xo

  • t.morley7@icloud.com'
    tracy morley
    May 3, 2017

    When i repeated your mantra I saw myself walking up my garden path towards the family home ; where all of my chores and responsibilities are always waiting for me and an exhausted narcotising wave crashed through my body. So I’m getting – it’s the litter of stuff and beliefs around this thats is blocking me from graduating to that next level. I have so many creative ideas re film/ tv scripts and children books that I am not putting out there – the block carries the same feeling. I know it’s connected. Thank you for breaking through and being the light you are.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Tracy,

      It is so true that the only thing preventing us for having our True life is the trauma and beliefs that are internally clogging us up, not allowing Life-force, inspiration and Wellbeing (our organic natural states) to flow through us.

      All we have to do is release / replace those, and the battle is over and Real Life begins.

      I am so glad you are feeling this truth!

      Mel xo

  • te1343@hotmail.com'
    Torhild Eik
    May 3, 2017

    A brilliant starting point when introducing the QFH reality and the NARP program.

  • katjababei1@gmail.com'
    Kat
    May 3, 2017

    Brilliant video, Melanie.

    Could I please ask: I think my sons are suffering from similar trauma, but obviously they are too young to deal with the experience in adult terms and so couldn’t
    take on board your concepts and programme. But I want them to overcome the trauma and fight their narc father’s damaging influence.

    I feel hugely guilty about how your and other methods are helping me, but my children aren’t able to access such helpful concepts.
    I don’t want their pain to go neglected, but I not sure what I can do. They both refuse counselling.

    • avab1@yahoo.com'
      Ava
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Kat,
      I felt this way and worried myself about it too. What I realized is that for children, we just have to model the behavior we want them to be influenced by and they will begin to naturally gravitate towards your light on their own. If you keep doing the healing, they will be drawn towards you, the healthier person. It worked for me.

      • katjababei1@gmail.com'
        Kat
        May 4, 2017

        Thanks, Ava.

        You’ve response is so helpful. Thank you so much x

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      HI Kat,

      please know many of us NARPers work on our children by proxy through our bodies – and experience that is the ONLY way to help them Quantumly …

      And it works INCREDIBLY well.

      We can’t “make” them do healings at any age … that is a choice as a mature individual they have to come to themselves.

      I will stand by it time and time again when we shift – they do they are Quantumly connected. There is no denying that reality.

      For your personally it is about releasing the traumas you feel about them including the beliefs you have described, cleaning up your wounds and working on them by proxy (which we coach you how to do this in the NARP Forum), then your sons will be better than well … just as our children are evolving into.

      Truly …

      The results are nothing short of incredible. With us working with NARP our children DON”T miss out at all.

      Please come into the NARP Forum http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/member and we will coach you on how to help your children by shifting their DNA for them.

      Mel xo

  • martin.issima@hotmail.it'
    Lady Jedi
    May 3, 2017

    Dear Mel,
    this is directly relevant to me…I am one of those people with the belief that I can’t heal my wounds and create my life. I’ve always known that but is surfacing violently right in the last days. I am back to live where I grew up for a while and all the progress done in the past year seems like another life; I am that level of triggered. I’ve been hit by a layer of desperation and hopelessness, I feel like this toxic environment is my reality even if I don’t want to. During a module I found the belief that I am “cursed” and I belong in the dark with bad people, and cut off from light and “my people”, and if I try to escape it darkness will get me anyway. I also found the belief that I deserve to be punished. In the “little me part” of this shift what did show up is a broken creepy lifeless doll…I felt the shift and the relief right away but since then I have been having nightmares, and I feel terrified it is something I cannot overcome. I also had realizations of others painful beliefs and feelings quite heavy, but the underlying one is still “you’re stuck and there’s no escaping this”. So I have very much appreciated your video, as it addresses directly what I am going through even though is not related to narc abuse. I also somewhat feel like a failure for carrying this belief itself (it’s very meta, isn’t it?) and not being “good at healing”…
    I have written down the mantra. I hope to get better…Thanks for everything xoxo

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Lady Jedi,

      as I am reading this I really do recognise “the darkness before the dawn” that place when we hit big deep stuff that feels like it is “taking us out” – yet when we meet and shift it we relate ourselves very quickly (instantly) to higher and more freer levels of self than we ever knew previously.

      I have been there many times previously in my journey, as have many of us NARPers.

      In your case Lady Jedi, for starters – as you have named – that belief needs to be shifted. Because whilst it is in existence no matter how much work you do on yourself, things and feelings will appear to confirm the validity of that belief.

      So as a really important series of shifts it would be great for you to use the Goal Setting Module to dig it out and clean it up diligently. And please know we can help you with that – all the way through – in the NARP Forum if you need support, suggestions and encouragement to get that done.

      You returning to the environment you are now in is perfect – because it has surfaced for you these beliefs that have to GO if you are to step forth into the next Highest Grandest version of your True You. These parts can’t come forward with you, hence why this has all lined up to deliver this reality right now.

      These traumas regarding “the darkness” can only be met and released to get free of them … as you know cognitively trying to overcome them (when this big) equals getting mired in them.

      The nightmares are your subconscious saying “this needs to be met and healed” and they give you direct information. As such you can say “ok that trauma of this nightmare where is it in my body?” and then connect to that within and shift – Module 1 shortened version of NARP is great for that.

      Rather than battling on with the belief and then feeling like a failure with it – just shift it Lady Jedi …. honey – go in after it and clean that little blighter out!!!

      Then it just will NOT be sabotaging you and you can go free.

      It is the same with all these beliefs you named. They are only beliefs – dense energy in your body clogging you up from receiving the organic flow of Life-force, Wellbeing, Expansion and Love that you really are (True Self).

      All you have to do is go in after them and clean them out.

      I hope this helps and sending you love and blessings … you’ve GOT this!!

      I believe in you and help hold the space for you.

      Mel xo

      • martin.issima@hotmail.it'
        Lady Jedi
        May 4, 2017

        Melanie I am so grateful for your advice but even more, for your loving presence, which I can truly feel. It means really a lot, as well as your encouragement.

        I love your definition of belief, it definitely helps me see it as something that it makes no sense to battle against or even think about too much. And yes I do battle with them – a state of non acceptance, or better, not surrendering that it is also something I am trying to change – because I have experienced that all progress starts with my surrendering.

        Thank you also for pointing out that “being here” right now is for my own evolution. A part of me knows that very well, but it is easy to lose focus of it when in pain and a good reminder helps 🙂 “These parts can’t come forward with you”, really did struck a chord. They can’t. I have no use for them where I am going, so I’m gonna have to let them go.

        Sending you a million hugs! xoxo

  • joni_spring@yahoo.co.uk'
    Joni
    May 3, 2017

    Thanks Melanie- I can say in the past two years since cutting contact with my ex-housemate I have noticed how many relationships in my life are unhealthy. I am working on making myself healthy and some changes for the positive are happening. Learning to see my happiness as paramount and willing to do what I need to make my life better. Then I can be better.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Joni,

      you are very welcome.

      That is wonderful you are focused on your own development and healing 🙂

      Bless!

      Mel xo

  • I8yourcupcake@gmail.com'
    Melissa
    May 3, 2017

    I feel lost ..

  • tuuliturtola@hotmail.com'
    A girl
    May 4, 2017

    Hi Melanie!
    I love your videos and you have helped me in my life very much!

    Sometimes I think, how do we actually know when we have really healed? I too had done a tremendous amount of “healing”, thought I was “done” and then attracted this N into my life, thinking he was the one. That is dangerous! :/ One relationship “expert” said that we know we have found our soulmate, when we can be “completely ourselvers with them, look into the eyes and feel like we have “come home” and feel unconditional love”. Oh boy, exactly what I felt with the N in the beginning!! So how do we recognize the real soulmate?

    With the N, I heard he was arrested by police. When I gently tried to ask him about it, he exploded. He said it is ME who is the bad person and if I continue “harrasing” him, he will report to the police that it is ME who should be arrested. That was THE moment when love died, right before my eyes 🙁 Until that moment, I always had a “reasonable” explanation for his unusual behaviour, but that moment…my eyes opened to see the truth, he was suddenly behaving like a total lunatic, his reaction simply was not “normal” anymore! It scared me.

    Several months has passed, we have no contact and no relationship anymore. Now I will visit the city where he lives. I am scared. What is he happens to see me and indeed tells the police something false about me? This feel horribly unfair, all I ever wanted was to find a lovely boyfriend and I fell in love with him, I really loved him. I should have all the freedom and peace to visit any city I want, without fear! This is classic N behaviour, he had probably the fear to be arrested and he very effectively transferred that fear into ME, made me to be the “bad guy” of the story!

    Today I had a huge aha-moment! I have always been controlled by fear. My father used to do that a lot, threated me with physical punishments etc. Ever since a child, I have been scared of everything, as a child, I feared ufos (!), ghosts, insects, men, being alone at home, sleeping alone…
    Today, at the gym, I just had this aha-moment, I’m probably “addicted” (get used to feeling) fear! Now as an adult, fear controls my career, finances, everything. I’m 40 years old and never before seen all this so clearly!! I wonder if it is possible to ever heal ALl this fear out of myself, as I think I’m so “used to” it?

    Sorry about so many questions…I hope I have been able to say something useful to others too! 🙂 Love and all the best to all of you!

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi A Girl,

      That is very painful, what you went through … big hugs.

      I was the same – as were many of us before being N-abused regarding “thinking we had done the work.”

      And the reason why it still happened is because regardless of how much cognitive work we had done on ourselves, there was still trauma trapped in our inner being as well as painful programs that were going to co-generate the validity of those beliefs to the letter regardless of what we “knew”.

      Subconscious dictates 95% of our life – thinking is only 5%. The true healing needs to be in the subconscious to truly change our life.

      When we meet “our soulmate” we are meeting the person who is the EXACT match of our inner programming. We all had that experience with narcissists – because these were “soul mates” the people who would reflect back to us our broken parts so profoundly that we were given the ultimate opportunity to heal what we needed to heal to love and approve or ourselves.

      One of the most loving thing any soul can do for another is to help hand us back to ourselves.

      We are never “completely healed” and part of healing is to know we are still going to experience life – but the difference is “Who will be in it this time?” For me knowing I am “healed enough” is this: I know I speak up, I confront, I show up and there is no way I would accept crumbs clinging on to traumatic relationships because I am now a generating forever evolving source of my own love, approval, security and survival.

      I am no longer inwardly a broken needy child trying to get other adults be a parent to my unhealed inner child, and I no longer leave fear and pain in my body without releasing it and up levelling to the next version of myself.

      I thought I had done all of that work on myself, but it wasn’t until I healed (released / replaced) my inner traumas that is worked for real. That is what Quanta freedom healing created for me.

      Yes …A Girl .. you are BANG on! Fear (the trauma) in our DNA draw other things to fear.

      That is what all needs to be cleaned up to go forth into a new trajectory.

      I highly suggest to you the NARP Program http://www.melanoetoniavenas.com/narp because that way you get to do the healing work in a way that does work for real.

      I hope this helps explains

      Mel xo

      • tuuliturtola@hotmail.com'
        A girl
        May 5, 2017

        Thank you Melanie, I appreciate your help very much!!

  • Steph.roberts86@gmail.com'
    Stephanie Roberts
    May 4, 2017

    Hi Melanie,
    I have been watching your videos and reading your posts for some time and they have helped me so much, to gain clarity on what happened to me and to realise that the abuse was real and not in my mind as my narcissistic ex would have me believe.

    I found out I was pregnant after I left my ex after he cheated on me and gave me an sti and after almost two years of constant emotional, sexual and financial abuse. I told him I was pregnant and even considered getting back together but his abuse continued and something clicked in me finally, if not for me, for my unborn child.

    I went no contact and changed my phone number after receiving abusive texts and calls. I gained as much support as possible from friends and family and started to thrive and see a life without abuse for me and my baby.

    My baby boy is now 6 weeks old and I did not put my ex on the birth certificate to protect my child. I have allowed contact but supervised in my presence. He has brought his other two children here and started making comments about us all going for tea, his kids asking to sleepover and my ex asking at every visit what I’ve been doing and with who. He started emailing me telling me he loves me and we aren’t finished and texting me saying the same. I started to feel uncomfortable and that he was merely using contact with my son as a way of getting to me, to try and Wear me down. He kept asking to come round and would stay for hours. I started to realise I had no boundaries in place and was not protecting myself.

    I suggested a more stable routine to create boundaries, it was then that he flipped completely, his mask slipped. He started insulting me, saying I was using my son as a pawn, that all I want is money, that I’ve been a mum for 5 weeks and think I’m super mum. He has threatened court so that he can be named on the birth certificate as he says it is imperative he has a say over my son’s future. It is all about control with him.

    I work in family law so I know the court process and I am confident that it wouldn’t even get that far, he won’t pay for legal advice and he is threatening me to get his own way, however, like in the past his words have stuck with me and I feel a knot in my stomach and every time my phone goes off my heart stops.

    I feel like I’ve gone backwards and I feel mad at myself for allowing him to get back in my head but I also felt that I had to seem reasonable and allow contact. I truly felt I was strong enough to handle the situation but clearly I’m not.

    I really want to be strong enough to be able to protect me and my son from him. I hope with your continued help through your emails I can handle the situation better.

    Thank you for your support and it is so good to know that it is possible to survive through this nightmare!

    Steph

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Steph,

      I am so pleased my material has helped.

      It is great that you are recognising that boundaries are needed, and what he has become when you are looking to create them.

      It truly is about healing the parts of ourselves that narcissists trigger so that we are immune and they begin to be benign in that way. That is when they lose power. The healing path if we keep it simple – find and release and heal the trauma being triggered – I promise is the fastest way to be solid, calm and KNOW what to do.

      It can all unfold in divine and organic ways from there.

      Wishing your strength and healing for you and your baby.

      Mel xo

  • milicama09@gmail.com'
    Sandra
    May 4, 2017

    Hi Mel,

    thank you for showing us the true way of healing and for being so kind, generous and loving. I have few questions regarding my healing with NARP:

    1. I feel there is unbearable amount of pain inside me, emotions so intense that I would break down if I face and feel them (like despair, injustice, victimization…I can’t stand it). Right now I am numbed because of food addiction, but if I stop eating unhealthily the pain will come up and I’m afraid it will hurt immensely. Is there something I can do about it or I just have to be brave?

    2. I’m afraid of becoming a homeless person, because the trauma is so great that it stopped me from having a job. I lost all money, all support (friends and family, I’m all alone), social skills, I had to quit education and in this condition I don’t have the strength and the ability to work and earn for a living. I’m terribly afraid of the future. Can NARP help me resolve all of this?

    Much love xo

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 4, 2017

      Hi Sanda,

      it’s my pleasure and sure I’d love to help with these questions, and please know we can all help you so much more – as well – in the NARP Forum … http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/member

      There needs to be specific shifts done with NARP on “I can’t face the trauma” … because that belief is going to sabotage your journey. The entire basis of getting well in Quantum Ways is getting the trauma (that is eating us alive and destroying our life) out of our Being, creating space and replacing it with Life-force and Wellbeing … that is what QFH does.

      And this is what turns our ENTIRE life around in record time in miraculous ways. because we become an inner force of our True Life, which is impossible with trauma clogging us up.

      Sandra we cannot heal what we are not prepared to face, meet, claim and feel. Thank goodness through with QFH we do that to move it OUT .. and the relief and space in our cells is incredible after doing that.

      Absolutely NARP http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/narp is specifically for all of this. And yes Dear Lady it is about being brave – but you don’t have to do this alone … there is an an entire army of angels to help support your and help you with this.

      Just as we did it before you …

      Mel xo

  • dm_hrs@yahoo.com'
    Ray
    May 5, 2017

    Strange how everything that is written would happen, has. Started this program and found so much strength. Have slowly crumbled. I am thinking it is the no contact part. I brought her into my community where I found true safety and now am divided. She is going to everything that I would sign up for. Agoraphobia is at an all time high and I cant even look at the sign ups anymore. Lost me….

    Ray

  • ultimatespice@yahoo.com'
    Jilian
    May 6, 2017

    I just stumbled upon this website when researching recovering from a breakup. I had a feeling something was different about this relationship. I just haven’t been able to “get over it” as everyone is telling me to do. I have been really trying to heal. It’s been over a year now and it doesn’t seem like the pain is any better other than I can function most days, but I was forced into medical leave from my job due to extremely high blood pressure and anxiety and have been suffering from PTSD (according to my therapist and psychiatrist) I just can’t seem to understand why…

    He left me very abruptly. 10 days before my birthday, two months before our wedding. He told me that my “personality just wasn’t compatible anymore” There was “nothing [I] could do to fix it.” He “didn’t want to work on anything” and he “wanted to be single.” (even though I did get the feeling he was talking to someone else on Facebook even before he dumped me) After three years and changing my entire life to fit his needs, that’s all I got. Empty words and dead eyes. And promises that I was still his “best friend”. He kept everything- our house, our cats. (I wasn’t even allowed to pack my own things when he said I had to leave.) Then he sold it all and moved to Chicago. He left all his friends behind… like none of us mattered anymore. I am devastated daily. I think about him, dream about him, and get this pit in my stomach when I feel something big is happening with him.

    He blocked me from everything social media related when he started dating (within a month after he ended it). I don’t think I did anything wrong. Not anything that would deserve to be left like that. I don’t know. I am second guessing everything in life. And I can’t seem to break the attachment. I can’t get rid of our wedding rings or my dress. I’m crying at the very thought of it.

    And despite the silent treatment, the control over finances, and the selfish behaviors I still miss him and my old life. I feel like I am a piece of trash that he dumped off. I feel worthless. And I must be if I am that easy to forget….

    I guess I will read more and watch more videos. This site seems like a good hub of information.
    Thank you for putting it all together.

  • Mdeenis@yahoo.com'
    Maria
    May 9, 2017

    Dear Melanie,

    I only recently found you and have stayed committed to reading and subscribing to your blog and newsletters. I wish I found you sooner because you are so helpful and insightful and I no longer feel alone.

    This video and article is very true in the fact that you do lose hope. I’m there now. I have recently gone down again after having been doing pretty good. The fact that the narcissist in my life still has a grip of me is hard. I ruminate a lot over everything he’s done and still continues to do and it’s hard to just keep living and going when he’s gotten away with so much.

    I hope to fully cross over and recover from his abuse and lead a better life free of him and his controlling narcissitic ways. But it is a hard process. Every time I feel close to fully breaking free, something happens and I go down. It’s not the way I want to be living my life.

    Thanks again for sharing and for helping so many of us! This video among all your others was very informative and helpful!

    I look forward to spending more time on here with you.

    Love,
    Maria

  • Marciblank@me.com'
    Marci
    May 15, 2017

    My local area has a clinic that is offering brain mirroring. A technology that allows your brain to recalibrate. It turns your brain waves into sound and plays it back while you listen. Have you heard of this? I am wondering how you would compare it to energy healings.

    http://brainlifecenter.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/unnamed.jpg

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