Melanie Tonia Evans

10 Things To Look Forward To After Narcissistic Abuse

Written by   Melanie Tonia Evans Permalink 40
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Written By   Melanie Tonia Evans

 

After narcissistic abuse we can feel that life will never be good again.

We crave for something new and different.

Today, I’m going to share with you ten beautiful Thriver Gifts that come naturally to you when you heal from the inside out.

These include learning what it means to love, support and approve of yourself while no longer accepting toxic people in your life, how to be present in the Now and have a greater connection to Source accepting that everything is perfect just as it is, and experiencing being open-hearted and authentic, therefore uplevelling relationships so that life just gets better and better!

Also, for those of you who are NARPers, I share with you some of my favourite Goal Setting Statements to help you anchor deeply into these Ten Thriver Gifts!

 

 

Video Transcript

For many of us in the world, today is Mother’s Day.

I’d love to take this opportunity to say Happy Mother’s Day to my beautiful mother, Lorraine, as well as all the lovely Mothers in our Thriver Community.

I know that this day can be quite a painful day for many of our Thriver Tribe, because you may be estranged from your mother or even your children. If this is the case, please feel a big, warm hug from myself and the MTE Team. I want you to know how special you all are and how loved by us.

Today, I want to focus on some positive things as my Mother’s Day gift to all of you – including the lovely guys in our community. This is information regarding the ten greatest things that we get to look forward to after narcissistic abuse. I hope you will find this information inspiring, regardless of where you are on your journey.

Also, I want to share powerful statements for those of you NARPers using the Goal Setting Modules as well as a BIG acceleration with the new Thriver’s Life Modules in NARP Version 3.

So, before we get started, I want to remind you that if you haven’t yet subscribed to my channel please do. And if you like this video, please make sure you hit the like button.

Okay, let’s jump in.

 

Number 1 – Loving, Supporting and Approving Ourselves

We discover through our brokenness and associated victimisation after narcissistic abuse, that the more we try to get love, approval and support from others, the less we get it and the more broken we become.

It may seem that other people are not ‘getting’ what we have been through. Family, friends, systems and legal personnel turning away and not helping is beyond horrific.

However, truly, this is all part of the divine plan, because we are meant to be stripped back to leave us no option other than to turn inside – to go to our Inner Being and Inner Child and do what we have always needed to do – to come home to love and accept ourselves.

Little did we know that this is the template that will bring ‘more’ from others.

After healing the Quantum Way and accepting the Energetic Law of so within, so without, we realise the real reason we were susceptible to narcissistic abuse was not because we were bad people but because we had been unknowingly ‘bad’ to ourselves.

If we aren’t self-partnered we try to blame and shame ourselves into shape. We are our own worst critics. We apply conditional love such as ‘I will only love and accept you if (and then comes the never reachable list of conditions)’.

We didn’t realise that what we are really battling is the inner critical parent; the inner narcissist. This meant that we accepted levels of love and pain at the same levels of painful love that we were treating ourselves with.

After narcissistic abuse and we go inside to release our trauma, we return organically to our True Self state of natural love, acceptance, support and kindness to ourselves. No longer do we struggle to get to these states because of wounds holding us separated from them – we just come home to them.

We know that loving and accepting ourselves IS natural when we are unwounded; it’s organically who we are. From there we get the pleasant shock of discovering just how possible it is to accept and love being in our bodies, on this planet and in life itself.

Everything starts from within.

Many people ask me what are the NARP Modules to achieve this. The answer is every NARP Module brings about this shift, however, Modules 7 and 10 especially grant boosts to get there.

The Goal Setting statement that goes with this is: I love and accept myself unconditionally without limits. It just is.

I also suggest you do the Source Healing and Resolution Module work to target and clear the traumas in your body that are not allowing you to love and accept yourself.

 

Number 2 – Being Present in the Now

Crisis consciousness is synonymous with narcissistic abuse. When we are traumatised, many parts of our brain and Being become dysregulated. We are thrown into states of hyper- or hypo-arousal – that is we are either too over stimulated to perceived threats or we shut down and are unable to interact because our willpower and belief in ‘Self’ has collapsed.

This means we are frozen in the traumas of the past and the fears of the future, and unable to be present and functional in the present. In our previous existence of trying to manage our traumas with medications and strategies, they still existed and it was exhausting having our energy tied up trying to survive our wounds. It meant that we were always trying to stay one step ahead of what could happen.

When we release the traumas and deep survival programs that narcissistic abuse brings up, we can deeply just BE and discover a surprising thing – the mind stops overanalysing everything.

Also the previous energy tied up in trying to manage and survive your inner wounds is released as pure creative energy. This means you have the inspiration, knowing and excitement to be yourself and do wonderful things in life.

You also discover that without your logical mind in the way, you are open to receive Infinite Intelligence – the direction, answers and guidance from a much deeper, wiser, expanded part of yourself. Your True Self who you organically are without your traumas.

Module 1, 3 and 8 in NARP are powerful steps to get into the Now as your natural state without battling to try to stay there.

The appropriate Goal Setting statement is: I release myself from the past to know I am blessed and safe right now. Without my trauma I can just Be.

I also highly recommend a Source Healing and Resolution Module to clear the traumas of ‘My over-active mind’, which will free you from the traumas pulling you out of your Being to be safe in your body.

 

Number 3 – A Greater Connection to Source

Whether we are religious, spiritual or simply acknowledge that there is an unseen force in all of life that keeps our heart beating and masterminds the beauty of nature surrounding us, the following applies: when we detach from False Sources for attempted soothing and love, and start filling ourselves with our Higher Power of lifeforce and wellbeing instead, we discover what it is to be truly nourished and flourished by All of Existence.

After releasing the traumas that were making us dependent, needy, broken and contracted, and opening up our hearts and mind to something bigger than us, we discover how incredible life becomes when we are connected to ‘the Field’ of Quantum possibility which allows life-force and wellbeing to flow through us.

This connects you to trajectories where you organically experience synchronicity, love, support and incredible connections that just can’t be conjured up by your cognitive self. This is because our left-brain limitations can’t comprehend the permutations of how things energetically line up and the intricacies and perfection of the symphony that we all are – wave functions interconnected with each other and everything.

Without our traumas we start to experience Who We Really Are – not self-disconnected from the All, but a part of this greater system of Life, fully loved and accepted, knowing ourselves as Source knows us – inherently worthy of our highest and greatest life.

This connection, which is a spectacular by product of Thriver Recovery, shows us that what our soul seeks is just as determinedly seeking us – and easily becomes our life when we get the trauma of ourselves out of the way.

Modules 7 and 10 in NARP specifically caters to this beautiful alignment in our life.

The Goal Setting statement is: I now open up to receive Source flowing through me as me. I see myself in all my glory and truth as Source knows me.

 

Number 4 – No Longer Accepting Toxic People

When we come home to being whole within ourselves, we are no longer needy for junk. Just as Don Miguel Ruiz explains in his book The Mastery of Love about the Magical Kitchen, if we have a beautiful well-stocked kitchen to prepare and make delicious nutritious food, we would not accept a dodgy deal of being controlled by someone just so that we can partake with them in greasy pizza.

When we are self-generative, we no longer accept bad behaviour from toxic people. We already feel whole and full and so we can say ‘No’, not take it personally, stop trying to turn crumbs into cookies, and cease trying to fix and change people so that they can soothe our wounds and make us happy.

Instead, we can affirm our values and truths and let go to allow them to have their journey with whatever and whoever it is at their level of development, whilst we take full care for our own journey.

The NARP Modules which assist us to generate this level of personal power and inner solidness are Modules 2, 4, 5, 6 and 9.

The Goal Setting statement is: I bless and let you go. I devote now to healing me and connecting to the Life, people and situations which is my truth.

 

Number 5 – Being Able to Be Open Hearted and Authentic – Safely

When we were narcissistically abused, of course we felt we had to hide, shut down and protect ourselves from toxic and bad people.

When we went inside to heal the traumas that were unconsciously allowing us to be susceptible to these people, then we emerged feeling impervious to them.

My motto is to be powerful and graceful, simultaneously and, as I learnt in my recovery, that in no way do we need to shut down and be secretive or defensive in order to be safe. All we need to do is be ourselves, no longer being derailed because of fears and traumas.

This means being lovingly heart-centred and direct. It means speaking up if you need clarification, asking for what you need honestly, and no longer handing your wounds to people hoping that they can ‘fix’ them for you.

The bottom line is, if you are doing the work to address your traumas as your first and foremost mission, in order to get honest, solid and whole in your body, then you can fully be yourself shining a bright light no longer dancing around other people wounds, get sucked in by or dimming down and hiding out.

When we were previously doing these things, we were like injured gazelles at the edge of a pack ready to be picked off by a predator. The strongest, most buoyant boundary beast won’t be touched, and, in fact, we become bright lights of authentic power with Source flowing through us.

This is far too powerful for energy vampires to be near.

All the NARP Modules will help you get to this place.

The Goal Setting statement is: As my True Self I am impervious to all that is not my truth, worth, reality and values.

 

Number 6 – Uplevelling Existing Relationships

After taking on the journey to heal from narcissistic abuse, if we are doing it for real we get very honest about how we have been showing up in ways that have cogenerated the experience of disappointing and painful relationships.

We start to investigate, without judgemental and with fascination, how we have been people pleasing, not laying healthy boundaries, handing our power away in order to try to be loved, or being indirectly passive aggressive because we don’t believe in our worthiness enough to speak up for our needs and be honest about what our values and truths are.

Like so many of us, this was huge for me too. I went from being completely stuck inside, feeling like I had no rights, voice or value in so many of my critical relationships, to understanding I needed to show up differently and be honest. The transformations in my life were incredible. Some relationships ended; others raised up into evolutionary relationships. And my relationship with my family and son evolved in record time with such love and beauty. I was able to use my ‘anchored in my body’ skills, truth and authenticity in intimate love relationships – with the beautiful results that I live today.

From this incredible graduation of self, regarding boundaries, authenticity, relationships and love, we have the courage and skills to create and generate new relationship as well as vastly improve existing ones.

The NARP Modules for this are Module 2, 3 and 6, but in reality all of them.

The Goal Setting statement is: I now show up healthily and honestly in my relationship to generate my true value. I do this with power, grace and kindness.

 

Number 7 – Being Self Generative and Then Experiencing Even More in Life

The dire pain of narcissistic abuse, and even before narcissistic abuse, is that we can feel alone, unsupported and unloved by life and others. Most of us have gone through extreme periods of feeling like this. What we discover is that if we try to hook up with people to ease these feelings, we continually suffer rejection, toxicity and abuse, which leaves us feeling even more empty and unfulfilled.

This is because we are looking for love in all the wrong places.

Whether you are religious, spiritual or neither, I promise you there is only one place to feel ‘filled’ from and that is Your Super Conscious/Higher Power – whatever this Higher Power is to you – it could just be Life-force. I love this about the Quanta Freedom Healing. Every time we release a trauma and bring in Source to replace where that trauma was, we fill with MORE wholeness, love, wisdom and True Self.

We organically reconnect back to our true essence – which is a part of the Whole and is ALL these things.

In this state we feel incredible love, belonging and acceptance just as we are.

The loneliness is gone and the emptiness is filled. Because we have turned inwards to self-partner and self-heal, we have become our greatest lover, supporter and healer and, coupled with the almighty power of our Higher Self (Source), we now have the partnership of love that we have wanted all of our life.

Then we discover the miracle of so within, so without – that when we are releasing fear and pain (trauma) and filling continually, situations and people naturally come towards us to add more to that fullness.

We find that relationships, support, synchronicities, possibilities, opportunities and miracles start arriving. With our now established self-loving and self-respecting boundaries we can investigate these potentials fearlessly, mindfully and sensibly.

All the Modules relate to this point, because the complete NARP system is delivering you to be self-generative. Doing the healings is profoundly self-generative.

The Goal Setting statement is: By becoming my True Self, The Field naturally grants me more of me.

 

Number 8 – Expanding Beyond Previous Comfort Zones

When we are traumatised we are shut down and can’t take action. We are limited in our lives and seem to keep generating at the same level of disappointing limitation with no access to a bigger, richer and more fulfilling field of possibilities.

In releasing our traumas, we know ‘growth’ means growing past where we used to be.

I used to be so agoraphobic that I had to stick to a very small number of safe places and routines to avoid massive triggers going off. I know you can probably relate. Yet when I met and released these triggers within me, I had space inside and outside to move and grow and explore. Plus I was determined. I knew I could confront and release any triggers inside me with Quanta Freedom Healing. Now I never have to hide, shrink and contract. And why would I want to? That wasn’t the real me!

One of the greatest joys of Thriver Recovery from narcissistic abuse is the unlimited expanding that is possible. Life begins to fill with a richness and possibilities that you may never have known existed.

Finally we understand that the only limitations to our life have been the blocks (traumas) within ourselves. When these go, a whole new world and life opens up.

I adore how unlimited, expansive and miraculous my life has become, and I adore watching so many of you NARPers also living the same expansion that bares no resemblance to your previous traumatised self.

This is what I want for everyone.

For those of you NARPers ready for this level of accelerated expansion, my suggestion is the Empowered Self Course.

 

Number 9 – Knowing How to Lose It All to Get It All

When we are full, we know that we have unlimited permutations and continual generation of more from The Field. There is no lack. We know that if something doesn’t work out there is more from where that came (The Field). We also know that when we stop participating and say ‘no’ to something and are prepared to go without before the real thing shows up, it is the universe signalling in powerful ways to supply us a graduation that we have never accessed before.

This is where we know we win either way – either that the person or situation will step up to meet us at the level of our values and truth or they leave our experience and the real thing will enter.

You must know this – if you tolerate something it IS and WILL be your reality. If you are willing to lose it all to get it all, then you are honouring and creating your True Self and True Life.

All of the NARP Modules help you reach this level of development.

The Goal Setting statement is: I release all that is not me and open the space within and without for it to enter my life.

 

Number 10 – Accepting That Everything is Perfect

Acceptance is key. Without it we can’t create our grandest and truest life. This is one of the most powerful mantras to ever adopt – This is happening for me and not to me. What this really means is: Thank you for signalling within me the understanding of another trauma I can now release and live free from.

This is powerful Quantum growth. This is the ability to bless everything, no matter what it looks like, and to work with it in the most positive and powerful way regardless of whatever anyone else is or isn’t doing.

This is the thing. When we give up the notion of trying to control and change other people and things in order to have a great life, and go inside when we are triggered to resolve our Inner Being back to peace and solidness, then we KNOW what wisdom we have gained, what action to do (or not to do) and which direction to take.

And it all unfolds beautifully. In fact, it means our life just gets better and better. Our growth, relationships and success all heal. We stop having to experience the same painful patterns and traumas over and over again because we are resisting the triggers of blaming ourselves and others for feeling that way, and therefore missing the Healing Graduation opportunity.

This is all perfectly and exactly what our soul intended. We understand this when we wake up from the trance, see the magnificent bigger Quantum Picture and start working with it.

All the Modules in NARP allow you to achieve this level of acceptance because that is exactly what you are using the Modules for!

The aligned Goal Setting statement to help you get on board with this powerfully is: I accept that life is working FOR me, in all circumstances, to deliver me to my greatest joy and truth.

Do you know how powerful gratitude is? Wait and see what it will do for your life. The ultimate gratitude is the acceptance of this truth.

 

For those of you who have not as yet started the inner work to step onto the Thriver Recovery path, I’d love to explain more to you about it with an invitation to sign up for my free resources. These resources will help you understand how true inner healing works and how to start actualising it.

You can get started with me by clicking this link. 

And if you want to see more of my videos, please subscribe so that you will be notified as soon as each new one is released. And if you liked this – click like. Also, please share with your communities so that we can help people awaken to these truths.

Okay … just before I close off. I’d love to ask you for your feedback about these ten blessings regarding Thriver Recovery – where you are with them (no matter where that is). Also I would love you to ask any questions that you may have about them. And for all you NARPers, please let me know if you want extra direction with the ten Thriver expansions.

Please write your comments and questions below, as I love answering them for you!

 

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Melanie Tonia Evans is an international narcissistic abuse recovery expert. She is an author, radio host, and founder of Quanta Freedom Healing and The Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program. Melanie's healing and teaching methods have liberated thousands of people from the effects of narcissistic abuse world-wide.

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43 Thoughts on 10 Things To Look Forward To After Narcissistic Abuse
  • jecenderlin@gmail.com'
    Carolyn Enderlin
    May 13, 2019

    Thank you so much Melanie for writing this “10 Things To Look Forward To After Narcissistic Abuse” especially on Mother’s Day! I’m so happy with my relationships with my husband, children & grandchildren; as they are opposite of the treatment I’ve received from my parents. My dad died from Cancer 8 years ago. It is my own mother who continues to do terrible things to me as her daughter & to my daughter, grandchildren, as well as my brother. We are in the process of healing by following your advice. You have given me free sessions; which I am going to start this Winter. At this time, I’m preparing to go to Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota United States; for I am a “test patient” of 37 years, being born with many physical disabilities. The best blessing is I became a Christian at the age of 8 years old at a free Vacation Bible School in our community. This has made a tremendous difference in my help: from whom I call my “Divine Team” of God, Jesus, Holy Spirit in my life! I’m doing what I need to do, to prolong my life physically. By Winter-I’ll have done the things needed to do-which are of utmost importance to stay alive. The free program you gave me, I plan to do this Winter; to help me with my emotional & mental feelings to have more healing in this area. You have given me much hope. Your times you come onto my email, I listen & it helps me also at the time as encouragement! Thank you for all you are doing for me & many others. You are in my daily prayers for God, to continue to bless you with many abundant blessings for you & your loved ones, Sincerely, Carolyn Enderlin

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 13, 2019

      Hi Carolyn,

      My heart goes out to you and yours for the loss of your father.

      I wish you healing and breakthrough.

      Thank you for your lovely post and blessings and keep being the wonderful inspiration that you are Dear Lady.

      Much love to you.

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • rkmarshall56@gmail.com'
    Rhonda
    May 13, 2019

    I was especially interested in how you said when I learn to validate and approve myself, I will overcome people pleasing attitudes and behaviors. I will grow and be able to do and attempt more in my life. It’s cool that you said sometimes we have to be able to risk losing it all to gain it all. I want to forgive myself and others for my mistakes. I want to have a great life now, not contingent on other things and other people and their opinions.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 13, 2019

      Hi Rhonda,

      It is so lovely that you are feeling and wanting that level of personal freedom!

      Many blessings to you

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • lenepilegaard43@gmail.com'
    Lene Pilegaard
    May 13, 2019

    Hi Melanie

    You’ve been my inspiration and mentor all the way on my journey. It works! Whar you’ve told today is absolute true. To all of you who are about to start this journey I will say: Get started!

    Thank you so much Melanie and blessings

    Lene

  • Ilona.rocka@yahoo.co.uk'
    ILona
    May 13, 2019

    I totally agree with everything you’ve said, I’m actually now living the truth that life always supports me and everything happens for my greatest good. Life wasn’t always like that however. 3 years ago, when I started Narp, I was a shadow of a person I’m today. Full of fear, anxiety and pain. Used and abused by many, myself including. Health problems, heart breaking miscarriages…
    Now I know that my painful experiences were my greatest lesson and I’m in acceptance with everything that happened. I actually believe that those experiences saved me and without them I probably wouldn’t even be here, which you as well talk about so often.
    It was emotional to see You and Zack (hope spelled correctly) together during your latest YouTube Q&A video. The bond between the two of you is so obvious. The powerful protective arm of your son around your shoulders and the unconditional gentle love in your eyes towards him….it was very moving.
    I will soon become a mother to a gorgeous boy. Against all the odds and what everyone believed and told me, after three miscarriages, at 41, I will be welcoming to this world in August my first child, my son❤️
    I feel so in love, so grateful and so amazed by how incredible my life has become that it has exceeded any of my dreams. I’m very exited about now and future.
    I know that without Narp and work on myself I wouldn’t be where I’m today. I’m so very grateful…thank you
    Lots of love

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 13, 2019

      Hi Ilona,

      I so love that you too live in acceptance and gratitude for your journey. That is so powerful!

      Thank you regarding what you have said about Zac and myself. It is very true our bond is very special, I feel blessed to be his Mum.

      How beautiful you are expecting your boy. Awww goodness! I’m so happy for you!

      So much love to you Ilona. Your message has made my heart sing with joy.

      Thank you for being a Thriver!

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • jenny.pretorius.nz@gmail.com'
    Jenny
    May 13, 2019

    Dear Melanie.
    I am increasingly reaping the rewards of doing the NARP work. I feel powerful and happy and humble at the same time. Life is GREAT. Imperfect, but great nevertheless. The difference is chiefly in ME. Four years ago, I would never have believed I would stand with so much joyful pride where I am standing today. Having laid down baggage that never was mine to carry. Growing so much. I did not even think I would live this long. But I have myself, my spark, my joie de vivre back. Thank you more than all the stars in the universe. Bless you, you work, and your dedication. There are many others who did excellent work too that helped me in equal measure make sense of what was at the time an insane and incomprehensible life, and to those experts I say the same: Bless you, you work, and your dedication. But you, my dearest allright sheila, were the first one to open my eyes, and point me in the right direction. Carpe diem, la dolce vita!

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 13, 2019

      Awww Jenny,

      I am overjoyed for you to read and feel your excitement and life force.

      It is a ‘miracle’ who we become when we effectively rid ourselves of inner trauma!

      Bless you and please know how welcome you are my brave fellow traveller!

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • msviking212@msn.com'
    Carol Rafferty
    May 13, 2019

    I can not listen to this today. Sat lead into Mother’s Day. My identity has been stolen & I was lucky to know who it’s. Unless my daughter is being abused she too will be spending years in prison. Landed in the hospital, was treated horrible, my proof & witness were discounted. The FTC, Benefits, & Social Security are involved. Then I was told by the benefits the POA is not the POA that I’m. People should be going to prison, they are caught. My husband’s last words were No matter where you go, what you do or say I will take care of you. He is very dangerous the police would not listen rather call me names. Was attacked in the hospital. My blood pressure was so dangerously high & all these people will be reported. All the paper work, legality. running around, packing & moving quickly & I am right in the midst of a nervous breakdown. How am I suppose to do all this, when I can’t eat. He is manipulating our daughter right into prison over money. The pension is not for the children & certainly not for an in law. My legs are badly swollen & I have tendinitis so how do you lie about that. I keep quoting the date & the address where something horrible happened to my entire family & that is ignored. I might be getting the police report, because the FTC will tell you some will want it & some won’t, so get a police report. The police hamper an investigating with the FTC I know, you know what would happen. A woman ambulance attendant was asking sarcastic question, but not to be mean, to get me to say the right thing & I did. Her advice was never mind your office, move fast & leave the area. She had no trouble believing me & told the hospital desk to get in touch with no one, this situation is dangerous. The desk was witnessing thing & she gave me her name & a couple of numbers & her name. I was treated so stupidly as if I didn’t call a taxi. Even in the rain the taxi was pretty quick & proved the officer was being insulting, so I gave him a $10 tip. Mother’s Day was spent fighting God knows how many people, identity theft, being ridicule. At the same time, the hospital staff was starting on a younger man & all he did was say he didn’t like his diagnoses & I can’t say I blamed him. He was only sitting & rather quiet & they wouldn’t leave him a lone. I’m going to my health care & doctor for starters to report this. When I got home my blood pressure was through the roof & I could have had a stroke. Where I live, the victims are treated so cruel. Not in the mood for people today, I rather isolate than put up with this, but then it comes in the mail, phone, & on line. Maybe, I will shut down for a month. Never thought I would say this, but I hate most people. All they want to do is destroy someone’s life. A retired police from the south got it out there, don’t date or get married, men & women are ruining each other’s life. I saw a nice man, who tries to encourage & help people get jobs & he was badly attacked. I stood up for him & again, I got attacked. God should never have created people, look at all the innocent people dying over this, I wish I would. I am married for 51 Hellish years & couldn’t get away. Now, no contact for 14 months & it has gotten worse & he is not here. Thanks to the internet anyone can find anyone. Mother’s Day means nothing to me, but to those who do I hope, your day was the best of the best!!!

  • katlouise101@gmail.com'
    Catherine
    May 13, 2019

    Thank you Melanie, your genuine care and sharing your experience is a lifeline for me. After 38 years of marriage to a very successful, clever covert narcissist, I am slowly gathering momentum to end it. The exasperating issue I face is that after all the years of the cyclic Silent Treatment, then verbal abuse, insults and threats is that he refuses to acknowledge his behaviour, and refuses to divorce. People around me have no idea what goes on covertly. Although I have moved away, he continues to say we must work towards a ‘normal’ marriage! This is a crazy-making situation. Your videos, understanding, inspiration helps to keep me determined to say focussed on working towards complete freedom just TO BE ME.
    My son and I have always had a beautiful close relationship, is now also distant, and completely wrapped up in my husband. I believe my husband has poisoned him against me with accusations of despicable things that are absolutely not true. This horrifies and devastates me. But my intuition tells me the truth will eventually come out and healing will happen. My two daughters are an amazing support and experience his behaviour first hand.

    My heartfelt thank you for your precious and valuable information and care!

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 13, 2019

      Hi Catherine,

      I am so sorry you are going through this intense period right now, but please know if you keep walking your truth, purging the trauma and being grace and integrity with sold calm power (on the inside regardless of what is happening on the outside) – then things will shift to meet you at True Self Level, including the coming together healthily with your beautiful son.

      Are you working with NARP? It takes your path to a much more direct, quicker and powerful level by bypassing the logical mind – where we struggle with the trauma of all of this – getting the programming done directly within your Inner Being, which is where it has to take hold to be effective.

      When people start with NARP, often their only regret is they didn’t try the program sooner.

      I hope this helps.

      Sending you strength, healing and breakthrough.

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • mamacrow71@gmail.com'
    Michele
    May 13, 2019

    Hi Melanie,
    I bought your book and have been plodding along, working my way through the steps. It always amazes me how the feelings that come up after completing one step just naturally flow and are the feelings being addressed in the next step! I’m experiencing more space and freedom and its wonderful.
    I do find that quite frequently after shifting that I will have odd dreams. They are not always pleasant but I do not have any strong emotions from them, more just a feeling of curiosity or interest. I’m guessing the dreams are part of the shifting process as well?
    Thanks,
    Michele

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 13, 2019

      Hi Michele,

      I’m so pleased my book is helping you process and heal! That’s wonderful!

      Yes dreams are what the subconscious is starting to purge and heal from. They can also help to make conscious our next steps to know what to heal.

      It sounds like you are doing a great job and are definitely on your way.

      Much love to you.

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • teriashmeria@gmail.com'
    Violet Spectre
    May 14, 2019

    Happy Mother’s Day Beautiful Mel! I just had to drop you a line to say thanks for passing down this treasured “recipe” on Mother’s Day. Truly- handing down recipes is just one way women have preserved traditions for centuries. Now, moving forward- we have you, dear Quantum Guru, with wonderful new dishes to try and powerful guidance for us to use in NARP. Then we can all eat at the buffet that the Universe has laid out for us…much love to you on this Mother’s Day. xoxoxo

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 14, 2019

      Violet sweetheart thankyou – and happy Mothers Day to you too!

      I love the way you write and describe life my fellow angel Quantum guru!

      (You so are!)

      We are so blessed. Love you!

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

      • Getmail100@yahoo.com'
        B
        August 30, 2019

        This work delivers. If you work Narp, the blessings are way more than I could ever have dreamt. Love love living this way now…..NARP NEVER FAILS YOU. I work it whenever needed, self partner as a way of life now. It catapults one to a level that makes living life now just wonderful. Yes I have triggers, yes I work amodule if needs, yes Ive got to go within every time Im feeling off about something or a person……soooo grateful for Narp…..its amazing just how it brings me to morespace within. Things that bothered me dont even crossmy mind anymore. Work it because it never fails you. Narp truly is my best friend for life

  • Branigan23given@gmail.com'
    Rachael
    May 14, 2019

    Hi Melanie
    Your post is timely I am very grateful for it, reason being me and my (husband) had been separated for 3 and a half yrs divorce papers not finalized yet… I half this trauma of him assigning people to follow me especially when he sends money for child support I still don’t work but it really bothers me… He uses mutual friends or just some of the people he knows passing my house several times a day.

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 14, 2019

      Hi Rachael,

      Please know Dear Lady that you can rise up and out of that fear, so that you are free to be yourself.

      Then truly it does all stop…such is the phenomenon of narcissistic abuse and how when we heal, it ends.

      I’d love you to connect to my free resources to learn more about this – http://www.melanietoniaevans.com/freecourse

      I hope this helps.

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • Gabriele.G.Schulze@gmx.de'
    Eli June
    May 14, 2019

    Dear Mel,
    such a powerful video and always thankful for the script, because my english is not very well, but I can read and understand. After working with your book, which brought me so much relief, I now joined the NARP community and it calms me so, being guided by your voice. I do this work daily. And things are shifting slowly. My outer world has not changed yet, much more disturbing instead, but I have more and more the strong feeling of, I will through it and my goal is a fullfilling life, my life, after 55 years of living with abusive people. I have hope.
    Unfortunately it is very difficult to me to get access to NARP3, even I am very kind and friendly supported by your team, but my technical abilities are very limited so I can´t cooperate to be successful. But I do trust your team.
    Thank you for doing your work.
    Eli June

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 14, 2019

      Hi Eli,

      I am so pleased the inner work is helping you so much. The support team are amazing and patient and will do all they can to help support you technically.

      Sending you love strength and breakthrough.

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

      • Gabriele.G.Schulze@gmx.de'
        Eli June
        May 14, 2019

        Dear Mel, so sorry I got the message, that my problem is not resolved and so I asked for money back, but that is not what I wanted, I really really wanted to be a NARP 3 member, but they couldn`t help me. Makes me sad.
        So I will continuing the work according to your book. I am disappointed.
        Best wishes to you.
        Eli June

        • Melanie Tonia Evans
          May 14, 2019

          Hi Eli June,

          I just popped a message through to support regarding your situation, and this is what the lovely Iva wrote back …

          ‘We probably can help her, no doubt. I ‘know’ her, a very kind lady. Could you please kindly ask for her just a bit of patience – We will be able to assist in about 5-6 hours time. And we will see how we can best assist her, of course!’

          Don’t give up yet Eli, that would be a shame. Help is on its way. Okay?

          Mel 🙏💕❤️

          • Gabriele.G.Schulze@gmx.de'
            Eli June
            May 14, 2019

            Oh Mel that sounds wonderful ,but they gave me the money back, but I will send it return. I would be so happy if they can solve this problem. It means so much to me, finding you and the program!! I don`t want to give up, but nothing seems to work over many days.
            So so thank you Mel, I hope everything comes in order and I really don`t want the money back, much more being in the NARP3 and community.
            Thank you!!!
            Eli June

  • Maoju9@gmail.com'
    Fall flower
    May 14, 2019

    I followed you before I left the marriage a year ago. I bought your book. I look your video sometimes. I need transition of my life/ empower myself to help my son transit.
    I have difficulties to face or look the person . I didn’t completely transited my myself. I am very interested in your system which help people. I don’t have extra money can pay. I wonder if there is grand for low income mom?

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 14, 2019

      Hi Fall Flower.

      I am so pleased you are loving my resources.

      Please know we do have sponsorship opportunities for NARP.

      You can email support@melanietoniaevabs.com for more details.

      Sending you love and healing.

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • walsergio69@yahoo.com'
    Moises S Santoyo-Walser
    May 14, 2019

    After following you for the last six months. I want to thank you for the dedication and passion you put into this process of understanding the nature of Narcissistic abuse. I have been an skeptical person most of my life. But after having some powerful experiences, my mind started opening up to the higher source and the quantum field. This lead me to seek more and more my inner self and what derived from. In that process of liberating my painful past, feeling anew and refreshed, is that I attracted a Woman, who sucked the life out of me. I end up almost going crazy and loosing my life. What this type of people can do is absolutely evil and despicable. And they will not take any responsibility. Now I am in the journey of taking responsibility for my part. ALL THIS THANKS TO YOU! You directed me in the right direction, to seek within and not what the despicable poisonous snake did or didn’t do! That’s her luggage not mine. I am in the process of recuperation and as soon as my finances permit I will get the NARP course. God bless you Mel.😘

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 14, 2019

      Hi Moise,

      I love that you are tapping into Quantum truths and healing – it really does change everything!

      Sending blessings, healing and breakthrough to you.

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • ellejudd@yahoo.com.au'
    elle
    May 15, 2019

    precious ongoing contributions to Soul Repair after trauma. Ongoing ❤️ and heartfelt gratitude for education and healing

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 15, 2019

      Hi Elle,

      Thank you for your beautiful note and please know how welcome you are.

      Lots of love

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • monicalowney14@aol.com'
    Monica
    May 15, 2019

    Hello Mel.

    I am very interested in your program and was about to register. Then I read the privacy policy and discovered cookies and tracking will be put on my computer. I do not like this. Isn’t this why Facebook is receiving so much negative publicity for invading peoples privacy? Anyway, I would like to know the name of your book so I can simply buy that without he online tracking. Is there anyway to access your program without he online option? Thanks

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 15, 2019

      Hi Monica,

      The GDPR legislation required any website operating in Europe to display the notice regarding cookies.

      We state this notice for the sake of full-disclosure to be in accordance with global laws around privacy.

      Cookies are common practice and are stored by websites to improve users experience.

      We have strict policies and procedures around privacy. All data is stored and protected and never available to any third parties.

      I hope this explains!

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • anjasammon@yahoo.com'
    Anja
    May 16, 2019

    Hi Mel,

    Thank you so much for your “check list”, and what a nice “Mother’s Day gift” it is! Your course has absolutely changed my life and I just realise now all the areas in my life which have changed. It happens so naturally and gradually that it is really amazing to see how much freer, more relaxed and at peace I am with myself. There is nothing to lose, and so much to gain, and changes can happen so quickly. You really are brilliant. Thank you for all your hard work!

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 16, 2019

      Hi Anja,

      It’s my pleasure!

      I am so happy for you that NARP has helped so much!

      Thank you for your lovely message.

      Continued blessings and love to you!

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

  • anna_elina@luukku.com'
    Anna
    May 17, 2019

    Dear Melanie,

    “we no longer accept bad behaviour from toxic people”. Now here comes sticky question. The discard by the n was 2,5 years ago. Now finally I feel like I could let a man into my life again and I’ve actually met a new man. Yes, I’ve done healing so am I not especially concerned or afraid to meet a new n, but sure I would be super frustrated. It feels like…I wanna leave the circus to the clowns!
    This man has been somewhat romantic, saying beautiful things to me. I’m like yeah, is this lovebombing? But I think “all” men do that in the beginning, I mean showing this kind of sweet behaviour. So that itself doesn’t “prove” anything. Sometimes I ask something (by email, message) and get no answer. he can “ignore” me completely, like 1-3 days. I already start to feel alarmed, is this some silent treatment.
    So, like you said, I will not accept toxic people into my life. If indeed this man is a n, I run away and do not look back! But maybe it’s all my imagination. If he feels strange sometimes, unsure or withdrawing, it could be also because of my “funky” energy, negativity, being suspicious. Maybe I could just him a chance, and more importantly, give myself a chance! But the questions, at what point I can know for sure that a person is reliable, genuine, and not “acting”?
    I’m somehow prone to very quickly to judge him (or any man!) toxic, but what if he is just a normal human being? What if he can’t always communicate with me etc., if he is simply busy with life, work etc. in just that moment? I mean, that I’m assuming things that aren’t true, missinterpreting situations?

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 17, 2019

      Hi Anna,

      Please google my name plus dating and you will find a lot of helpful resources on this topic.

      Also I have a video coming out next week which is all about this.

      Personally the missing in action thing is not a good sign. If a man is dating you on the premise of checking you out to be in a committed relationship with him then he would be present, and available.

      My statement to him would be ‘I’m
      Sorry but this is not the dating experience I’m interested in. I’m looking for someone who is serious, putting in an effort and available.’ Then let go.

      Of course ‘being available’ doesn’t mean being hounded and seeing someone every day. But an interested man should be pursuing, organising next dates and stepping up to court you.

      In no way should you be initiating the pursuing. That’s a pattern we as women can fall into trying to make unavailable men available to love us.

      If he is not pursuing you healthily with integrity and reliability then move on and heal within whatever needs your attention in this. My resources explain more.

      I hope this helps.

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

      If he isn’t he’s not the right man.

      • anna_elina@luukku.com'
        Anna
        May 17, 2019

        Thank you so much for your support and insights!! <3 I look forward to the video!

  • kim@terrawestern.com'
    Dreama1
    May 18, 2019

    This was a fantastic gift! Thank you Melanie!

  • Kimm.vaughan58@gmail.com'
    Kim Vaughan
    May 18, 2019

    Cant Thankyou enough for these 10 points.
    You have given me Value and Strength. I left him today taking only my clothes. I cant beginnto tell you the many Blessings coming to me.
    A Beautiful home to stay peacefully by myself for next 6 months given me for $50- pw
    The Friend s who have rallied to Help me is Unbelievable.
    ACCEPTANCE truly is the Key. It Really Works n it radiates Love n Freedom from within.
    With all my Heart. Thankyou so much. Kimxxx

    • Melanie Tonia Evans
      May 19, 2019

      Hi Kim,

      You are very welcome and power to you sweetheart. Your true life awaits you with open arms.

      Love and blessings to you

      Mel 🙏💕❤️

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